ppl in my life have real hardships and i can't get over a girl.

[Blckrooster46]

So if you really want to know the full story I outlined all the bull in a thread called Broke up out of no where. first loves. but my main problem right now is that I have lost two friends over the past month, one while we were still dating and one about a week after the BU. On top of that over the past year my best friend's brother has been battling cancer and he comes to me a lot for guidance (I lost my father to cancer after he battled it for 8 years.) So he asks me about everything and I honestly have no real answers for him because my father only passed away a year and a half ago and I still haven't dealt with it fully. The only thing I could ever tell him that may lighten his load is love, what I thought I had with my ex, she gave me happiness beyond belief and I to her. Now that is gone and the people around me are dealing with real hardships and I can barely get up in the morning because of a girl? I just want it to stop. I want to stop seeing her face. I want to stop hearing her voice. I want to stop picturing her life without me and the subsequent happiness that follows. I want it all to stop because there are much more important things in life than heartache. When does it stop?

[happydate]

So if you really want to know the full story I outlined all the bull in a thread called Broke up out of no where. first loves. but my main problem right now is that I have lost two friends over the past month, one while we were still dating and one about a week after the BU. On top of that over the past year my best friend's brother has been battling cancer and he comes to me a lot for guidance (I lost my father to cancer after he battled it for 8 years.) So he asks me about everything and I honestly have no real answers for him because my father only passed away a year and a half ago and I still haven't dealt with it fully. The only thing I could ever tell him that may lighten his load is love, what I thought I had with my ex, she gave me happiness beyond belief and I to her. Now that is gone and the people around me are dealing with real hardships and I can barely get up in the morning because of a girl? I just want it to stop. I want to stop seeing her face. I want to stop hearing her voice. I want to stop picturing her life without me and the subsequent happiness that follows. I want it all to stop because there are much more important things in life than heartache. When does it stop?

 

You need to first realize that no one can give you more happiness that you can give yourself and when you give that love and happiness right now to your best friend's brother who is battling cancer, that in itself will give you the peace and serenity you seek, because when you giveth you shall receive the same in return. It's in the bible.

 

The thing with you is that, you are lacking self-love and that you need an external sources of love like a girl, a woman or your friend and parents to make you feel loved. And that's a problem when you meet ladies as once they give love to you, they need to receive that back from you. But if you don't know how to love yourself, then how would you give that love back to them? And it has nothing to do with physical sex either. Here's a good chance to learn by giving love and support to your friend who are in need of your love and support. When you give this love, you will be surprised to find that it's the same love you can give to your future girlfriend! So love is not only labelled as girlfriend love, parents love or brother love. It is the unconditional love you give to people that makes people love you back!

 

Blessings!

[Blckrooster46]

You know a lot of people told me that the reason we may have broken up is because she had a lot of self asteem and self love issues. She was beautiful but thought she wasn't, super intelligent but thought she wasn't, and so wonderful but thought she wasn't. She also dealt with her parents infidelity which really hurt her but she never dealt with. I gave her confidence but not enough or not the right kind and I guess what I am realizing is we both never could have given ourselves to each other completely because we both didn't love ourselves. We both tried to use loving each other to fill the pain we were experiencing and that would never work in the end. Thank you a lot this really helped me put things into perspective I am going to read this a lot.

[happydate]

You know a lot of people told me that the reason we may have broken up is because she had a lot of self asteem and self love issues. She was beautiful but thought she wasn't, super intelligent but thought she wasn't, and so wonderful but thought she wasn't. She also dealt with her parents infidelity which really hurt her but she never dealt with. I gave her confidence but not enough or not the right kind and I guess what I am realizing is we both never could have given ourselves to each other completely because we both didn't love ourselves. We both tried to use loving each other to fill the pain we were experiencing and that would never work in the end. Thank you a lot this really helped me put things into perspective I am going to read this a lot.

 

You are absolutely right that what attracts yourself in your life has in a way the same reflections of yourself. If she has self-love and self esteem issues, then you surely will have some amount of that in yourself; perhaps more so than her. It's basically the law of attraction at work and to provide you the lessons of love in life.

 

All of these incidents happening all at once is not created out of randomness. You can be sure that divine intervention is at work here and that I believe GOD has given you a mission to love a friend in need of love and that you are that man for the job since you have the experience with your dad. Just love him like a brother, a son and a human being and be with that person through the sufferings and peaceful end within your means and obligation.

 

You will come to see that once you are healed and become a better person that a better woman comes along and that you wondered what are you so sad and grieving now with this one!