butterflybabe Posted May 13, 2013 Posted May 13, 2013 Hi all. I've talking to this guy romantically for almost a year now. He's been hinting he's gonna ask me out soon. I just don't know if I'm ready for it. I like him a lot but sometimes he says hurtful things. I think he does it to make himself look cool, but it really hurts me. I think everyone does it. So here's my question: how do you deal? And if you live with your significant other, how do you get along if the person puts you down occasionally? Does it stop once you've known each other for a while or is it continuous? He's been hinting he wants to move in together, but I'm not sure I want to because I don't know if I can take his insults. He's a really nice guy and the insults are occasional, but I don't know we can be compatible/live together if he's insulting me. Any help would be much appreciated. Thanks!
Author butterflybabe Posted May 13, 2013 Author Posted May 13, 2013 He's doing that because he feels threatened. From past experience when a person feels threatened or being rejected they will do hurtful things. Try reading the book Women Can't Hear What Men Don't Say: Destroying Myths, Creating Love, you can get it on amazon for $12.15. I said I know that's why he's doing it. My question is how do I put up with it? I am a strong/positive person, but there's only so many insults I can take before I get fed up. Besides, how are we supposed to get along or have a pleasant experience living together if he's doing that? I just wanna know if it goes away after a while or if it's a continuous thing.
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted May 13, 2013 Posted May 13, 2013 I said I know that's why he's doing it. My question is how do I put up with it? I am a strong/positive person, but there's only so many insults I can take before I get fed up. Besides, how are we supposed to get along or have a pleasant experience living together if he's doing that? I just wanna know if it goes away after a while or if it's a continuous thing. What does he say? Maybe you're being too sensitive.
Author butterflybabe Posted May 13, 2013 Author Posted May 13, 2013 One time he said we were in the same class for a reason. Then, as soon as he said it, he said it "wasn't good for him, but good for people like him." Another time he told me he loved me, then shortly after he said he didn't. He said he was just drunk when he said it. He didn't even give me time to reply. -.-
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted May 13, 2013 Posted May 13, 2013 One time he said we were in the same class for a reason. Then, as soon as he said it, he said it "wasn't good for him, but good for people like him." Another time he told me he loved me, then shortly after he said he didn't. He said he was just drunk when he said it. He didn't even give me time to reply. -.- The first one doesn't seem mean at all. I'm not sure why you're interpreting it that way? (unless it was the way he said it) The second one was just him covering himself. He DOES feel that way, but wasn't sure if you felt that way so he took it back. In my longest relationship, when I started feeling "love," instead of telling her that, I asked her if she loved me. When she said yes, then I said "Good. Me too." LOL 1
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