FloatThroughMe Posted May 12, 2013 Posted May 12, 2013 Hi there, first time poster here. So for some backstory, my girlfriend of 10 months broke up with me a week ago, and I've been having a very hard time with it. We have had a very eventful 10 months, such as her moving in and out of houses due to living with bad people. I helped her every time with that. We have also had quite a few arguments along the way. None that we ever didn't move on from, however. (but I could be completely wrong about her opinion on that). So a couple nights before the breakup we had a huge blowout, and I definitely did and said some things that I regret that night. So I drove her home, thinking that we would move on like we always did. Except that the next day she wouldn't talk to me all day. That entire day I tried to get in touch with her with no luck. That night, she texted me saying that she was done and that she was sorry. Of course I freaked out and sent her a whole bunch of text messages begging her for not to do that (probably not the best idea but it's too late to take it back now). She didn't say anything else. So the next day, we decided to exchange the things we had at each others houses (we both didn't see each other.) She texted me 5 minutes after I picked up her stuff saying that the breakup wasn't easy for her either, which I agreed with. We both didn't contact each other until today, when sent me an angry text message because I added a girl from work onto my facebook and she thinks I'm hiding things from her (this was not the first time she had accused me of hiding something from her.) My ex had deleted me off of her facebook the night she broke up with me, so she would have found out by looking at our mutual friends I'm guessing. (Also, our blowout was originally caused by her jealousy of me adding a different girl onto my facebook, but then escalated further.) I responded, which may have been a mistake, saying that I wasn't hiding things and explaining that the girl was just someone from work. She sounded doubtful and then asked for the rest of her stuff when I received it in the mail. (She had lived with me for a while so some things are being mailed to my house). I didn't respond to that text, and then she sent me another text in a couple hours telling me that she had finally gotten the promotion at her work that she had been talking about for a long time. I'm wondering what's going on with her? I'm not sure if I should move on and attempt NC again, or if I should keep believing that what her and I had was something that would last, as much as I would love it to. What should I do?
ChelleBelle08 Posted May 16, 2013 Posted May 16, 2013 if she wants to talk to you, talk to her, don't be overly desperate. I have been making those mistakes lately. I want to keep the lines of communication open but i've had to learn to do it appropriately. Ive just been pissing him off. I and you need to stop initiating contact and if they do, keep it short and sweet, if she wants to hang out, just be yourself.. sounds like she is confused
JTP Posted May 16, 2013 Posted May 16, 2013 May I wish that you and her get back. I feel really bad for you as I'm going through a similar patch myself. The offering of the second chance is all that you can wish for. I'd suggest you talk to her but try not to bring up the relationship if she calls but try not to contact her yourself, if she contacts you thats fine but do not call her unless its been at least 4 weeks I say. Thats the best idea on how to let things happen. Have some general chit-chat if you can and just ask really basic things and make small chat, but try let things fly for a little bit so you can both clear your heads. Try improve yourself and take time for yourself while waiting so you don't go mad. Good luck. Hope you get what you want!
JTP Posted May 16, 2013 Posted May 16, 2013 I'd also recommend wait until she calls as opposed to answering texts or something.
Author FloatThroughMe Posted May 17, 2013 Author Posted May 17, 2013 Thank you both for the advice and support, it helps a lot actually. I've kinda been waiting for her to talk to me, which is just texting so far. The thing is, when she does talk to me, she only asks about the last of her stuff, which I don't have yet. So I just keep having to tell her that almost every day. I haven't initiated any contact yet, maybe because I'm the one who got dumped so I feel like she should? At the same time though, I don't want to lose any chance I may or may not have. This has all happened in just over a week though. So yeah waiting for that second chance, while also working on myself seems to be my only option. For a while at least.
aisuru Posted May 17, 2013 Posted May 17, 2013 Oh my dear friend, I know how this time period sucks. You are in shock, confused, and hurt. For right now, walk away quietly. Take one month. Just one month of no contact for right now. It will allow you time to regroup. You really should just step back and assess before you respond.
Author FloatThroughMe Posted May 17, 2013 Author Posted May 17, 2013 Yeah that's the plan for now. Eventually I'll have to give her the rest of her stuff when I get it, as she keeps asking about it anyways. Yeah after that though, I'm going to give us some space and hope for the best, whatever that may be. Thanks. 1
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