spice4life Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Hey Wellington...don't beat yourself up. These things happen before you begin to get past the "affair" stuff. It's the nature of the relationship. I know it's hard to hear right now, but there will come a day when you start to focus more on you. When that happens, you will start to let go of the unhealthy dynamic of the affair and begin to see that you deserve so much more! When that strength starts to build hold onto it as if it's a life raft when you feel moments of weakness. This probably sounds ridiculous right now because you are still caught in the web, but you will understand it when the time comes. If he can't be there for you in a way that feels right to you then you have to let him go. You have to let the affair go. I'm going through that right now and I feel like I am decompressing from years of forcing myself to hide my feelings and worse yet, being ashamed of them! I felt like I wasn't allowed to have them. That's not normal no matter what rules are! And let me tell you, this is by far one h*ll of a roller coaster ride out to the other side. Ugh. I had to get out before I became stuck in feeling like that is how you're suppose to be in a relationship. No way! I don't want to be that way at all. Sorry for going off on a tangent. I'm up and down right now as I ride this wave through to safety...lol. So try to not to beat yourself up. Everything your going through and feeling right now is normal. 2
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