gerwyn07 Posted May 8, 2013 Posted May 8, 2013 Understandably i might have not gone about this in the most best way possible, and in truth i am quite disappointed at how i handled this situation, however i'd really appreciate some feedback in regards to this. Basically, been a relationship for a year with my now 'ex' girlfriend, we had had our difficulties primarily with me not listening, though i felt this was sometimes true, she seemed ultra sensitive to whatever i said, my dyslexia didn't help. long story short a few weeks ago she started behaving strangely, when i asked she seemed to divert the question. though seemingly she was still making long term ideas such as getting tickets for download etc. Around that time she had taken on a new job and met a new guy, who she said she was friendly with, being trusting, i never though much of the situation, and knowing that questioning it would amount to jealousy. on later view i would discover that this guy was writing her poetry and quite simply 'chatting her up' while 'bad mouthing' whatever had happened to us as a couple. i'll explain how i found this out in due course, he had tried to get her to come around his once or twice for cooking, apparently this was a common thing for him to invite his 'female' colleges around for dinner. fully knowing she had a boyfriend, bearing in mind he's 37 and she's 24. Long story short, a few days ago we broke up. I thought fair play i've ****ed it up here and accepted my wrong doing, i apologiesed. The moment of realization had hit me in the most unusual of forms when upon receiving my laptop back from her, it appeared that she had not logged out her facebook account. I couldn't help but notice the amount of messages from this guy that i had trusted, and how much manipulation had gone on, whilst i quietly trusted my girlfriend. I learned that within 48 hours of breaking up, she had already had sex with said guy and considered moving in with him (parents didn't like him one bit, and was quite disgusted in her choice of partner, saying she lacked maturity, and to be frank was worried their daughter was being manipulated) it would seem that she had felt guilt and sadness about the breakup, but felt that this new guy was a 'Good thing', suggestions from friends questioned the morals of someone who was willing to chat up a girl knowing he had boyfriend, and that his wanting to dress her up in traditional dress and call her princess was disturbing. her close friends seemed unsure how to take this sudden change. This is perhaps where i should have handled myself more better, i called her and spoke about what i had discovered saying i was sorry about what had happened, and said that we should have spoke about our problems rather than other people, i also tried to warn her about this guy. it was obvious that he was exploiting her vulnerable character at this point. She didn't seem too phased, despite her parents saying 'Friends only, nothing at all out of work' i said we should meet and talk if she felt it was right. We started aguing over facebook, i had decided it was time to put in place non contact, so i blocked her and deleted all of her phone numbers. I had decided that we were in a state of loggerheads and there was nothing we could do, perhaps with space we could be more reasonable towards each other, every good part of our relationship was plagued by a black dust. it would seem that she had forgotten. Anyhow she defriended me on facebook, but i have a feeling this relationship won't last, i know its better for me to soldier on by myself, and improve myself, but how many weeks do you give this kind of relationship? how long before she misses me and contacts me again? how do i go about winning her trust back?
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