Skipper888 Posted May 7, 2013 Posted May 7, 2013 Hi guys i just wanted to say that i should have listened to all you guys from the start. Im sure you have heard my story from the million threads i create. Just want to say to all those people that hold onto hope and doubt NC please dont!!! It only serves you more pain. I was holding onto hope and trying my hardest to get my ex back but it will never happen unless they want it to. They wanted to break up with us in the first place and not much is going to make them change it back fullstop. No amount of begging, loving, texting, anything will change their mind just gives you a false sense of hope. Let go... they did long ago. Theres always something else to the story that will always remain a secret. Dont believe what they say cause its probably about 10% of the truth. You cant trust what they say and they dont care simple as that. Go NC. i wish i did it 4 months ago now im at the start again. Down, feel hopeless, knowing that she doesnt care and never really did and has a 4 month head start on me and i hate her for that. They stopped loving you the moment they left you!!!! 4
BustedUpInside Posted May 7, 2013 Posted May 7, 2013 that is so hard. I am really sorry that you have to go through this. Don't feel like anyone is judging you for not going NC from the beginning. I would be willing to be that there aren't very many people out there who are able to stick to a strict NC with the ex. Everyone has slip ups or moments of doubt, but it is good that you are taking steps to get better now. You can focus on yourself and what you need to feel better.
Author Skipper888 Posted May 7, 2013 Author Posted May 7, 2013 i cant stop thinking about her. Im at work and still cant. I literally cant see myself with anyone else. I just don't know how she could let me go. I really can't come to terms with it. I treated her the best. Loved her, always made her laugh smile, she always said how attracted she was to me, How good we were in bed, n how we felt when we kissed each other even up to 2 weeks ago when i saw her last. Just having a really hard time
Author Skipper888 Posted May 9, 2013 Author Posted May 9, 2013 i wanna contact her!!! i want to just say im sorry i couldnt trust her and i really want to be able to and for give me another chance. I told her to never contact me again unless she changed her mind, the way i said it was blunt and nasty and i feel bad for saying it. Maybe she was trying, maybe she was afraid id hurt her. She kept testing me by telling me things like she was sharing a room with 3 boys on the weekend and that she was going out clubbing and all this other stuff while we were trying to 'take things slow' Arghh tell me im doing the right thing and that i shouldnt msg her
cavalier99 Posted May 9, 2013 Posted May 9, 2013 Dude of course your doing the right thing! DONT CRACK! Stay NC like your life depends on it. If you dont you will be thrown right back into the pits of hell. Hmm well your already in hell so think of a WORSE part of hell!!!! This is just withdrawl. It will be better in a few weeks once you detox. Right now dont trust your brain. It will conjur all sorts of reasons to break NC. DONT DO IT. If you do you wont get better. Ive been where you were and it sucks. You need to get thru it if you ever want to heal. And you will heal with NC. I was NC 7 months to get indifferent after 8 year RS and im over it and with a new girl and it is awesome. Woudlnt have happened without pure NC. You can do it bro. Rock on! Cav
Author Skipper888 Posted May 9, 2013 Author Posted May 9, 2013 im trying so hard. I feel as though if i just text her everything will be okay. She must miss me, how we use to cuddle, kiss, make love, share out funny jokes. i just dont understand i really dont!
thefooloftheyear Posted May 9, 2013 Posted May 9, 2013 i wanna contact her!!! i want to just say im sorry i couldnt trust her and i really want to be able to and for give me another chance. I told her to never contact me again unless she changed her mind, the way i said it was blunt and nasty and i feel bad for saying it. Maybe she was trying, maybe she was afraid id hurt her. She kept testing me by telling me things like she was sharing a room with 3 boys on the weekend and that she was going out clubbing and all this other stuff while we were trying to 'take things slow' Arghh tell me im doing the right thing and that i shouldnt msg her Your story isnt unique..Its been told a million times. You can second guess til you're blue in the face..Does no good. You acted the best way you knew how. She isnt some "mythical creature" she is just a woman...And there are plenty of them and wow, wouldnt you know it, the other ones have the same awesome body parts all in the same places! And some might even have a better personality than the one that dumped you! All kidding aside. If they wanted you, you likely wouldnt even be on this site. Forget it..Grieve, take your lumps and move on....The most important thing you can get out of this is use it as a learning experience. She wasnt "the one"... TFY 1
cavalier99 Posted May 9, 2013 Posted May 9, 2013 im trying so hard. I feel as though if i just text her everything will be okay. She must miss me, how we use to cuddle, kiss, make love, share out funny jokes. i just dont understand i really dont! She doesnt miss you. Stop deluding yourself. When they leave it is because they want to. They want to date and f*ck new people. Accept it now. Totally blows huh??? Time to man up. Maitain your self respect at all.costs! Stay NC. Cav
mutant Posted May 9, 2013 Posted May 9, 2013 It's over Skipper888. Dude it's OVER. Nothing you can say or do will change your exe's stand. She emotionally abandoned this relationship way before the actual break-up and takes pleasure in letting you know she's spending her night with three other men. She's being callous and she knows it but also takes pleasure in it! Think of this like a job. You have been fired and you can't keep on begging your employer to take you back. It's quite unattractive and there is absolutely no reason to keep on with this while hurting yourself. Your only way out is to go NC and that's not an easy route but you don't have any other option. I tried winning the ex back for a much longer period- 7 months- without success. Those were 7 months of self inflicted torture which was completely unnecessary. My friend you cant keep on committing your resources to a lost battle, it's time to cut the losses.
CelticGibson Posted May 9, 2013 Posted May 9, 2013 She may have loved you once, her heart may have been in it at the time but not any more. Mutant is right. She emotionally checked out long before ending it and when the time came to end it she was over it already while you are only beginning to let go. One thing I learned is that you cannot project your level of interest on another. Just because you feel this way doesn't mean they do so when you say that she must miss you, this means you miss her and cannot accept that she doesn't miss you. The only choice you have now is to let it go and go No Contact. It's over and a new chapter in your life begins today. She is just one page in your book of life and there will be others in time but not until you begin to let go. Stop holding yourself back from getting the love you deserve...
Author Skipper888 Posted May 10, 2013 Author Posted May 10, 2013 i just broke nc im such a loser wtf!!'
Author Skipper888 Posted May 10, 2013 Author Posted May 10, 2013 im having regrets for not being able to trust her 2nd time round. Like she acted like we were back together in front of her family and thats a big deal.. should of i trusted her a little?
CelticGibson Posted May 10, 2013 Posted May 10, 2013 Skipper, you broke NC and now you are analysing whether to trust her because of her actions? This whole argument might make sense IF she was the one to break NC and try get back with you and was behaving this way. The fact that she didn't contact you should prove to you that she has no interest. She's giving mixed signals to you because she doesn't want you. The behaviour around her family is more out of not wanting uncomfortable questions later on. The simple matter of fact here is that SHE didn't make any effort to get back with you and the original assessment you posted in the beginning of this thread still stands regardless of what transpired after.... Go No Contact and Stay No Contact.... it's for your own good.
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