A bit lengthy but my story would appreciate comments so hurt :(

[Flutterbyme]

Okay.. Here goes...

 

It's day 3 of break up and day 3 of no contact from either of us.

 

I think what I'm struggling with and what's making me feel so bad is how he changed.

 

We have broken up before when we lived together but was nothing like this his desision came out of the blue and he was very depressed due to a lot of pressure of his family leaving the country. He was living in our flat alone and talking to a mutual friend and I also talked to him as I needed to sort the flat out. He didn't party or anything just cried. Then after about a week he contacted me saying he wanted to talk and broke down saying he had no idea about why he broke up with me and he said he would get help and I agreed to give it another shot but live separately .

 

I helped him a lot and I mean a lot I stood by him when he got down I helped him talk to his uncle to help him find somehow here to live equally he wanted our relationship to work and started talking about saving for a mortage. Four months passed.

 

Then it changed he started to live with his uncle and his single male cousin and he started get very frustrated with me at absolutely nothing. There was no reasoning. Then he'd buy me flowers and treat me like a princess. Then he said he wanted more space to hang out with mates and his cousin. Apparently I text him too much so I did less even though I never bombarded him. Around other people he's throw stupid joke comments that offended me like he was trying to be someone else or get into their sense of humour.

 

I planned a lovely day out for bank holiday which he knew about. That dreaded evening he told me he was going to his cousins friends party this girls birthday. I asked if I was invited he said no you won't know anyone I can't act like a lad if your there u don't like it!! He said he doesn't want to go on our special day out and I always make plans without consulting him !!!

 

He the. Basically said he loves me blah blah but I do this and I do that and I kept saying sorry I felt so defeated he said that he can't be ringing me telling me his feelings or always seeing me on my days off. Then i said sorry and he said no im the idiot i should say sorry!!!This hurt so much as I'd lost the person I knew he would always be the one planning and texting and couldn't get enough of me. Now nothing I said to him what's the point then and he didn't reply. Just nothing whilst I cried I got up and he said sorry and I said dont worry clearly upset. And I haven't heard anything since . I deactivated my Facebook and deleted his number. Friends said he went to this party as there was photos but didn't look to overly happy.

 

How heartless can he be? How can he change so much ? A lot of you will say it's a good thing but it hurts so much I feel I've done so much stuff wrong. I feel so sad :,( also we have a joint account that will need closing and I think we both have to be there also his dad has my NANs Hoover from when he helped us move and also I have a jumper and DVDs of his :@

[TaraMaiden]

First question is 'How old are you guys'....?

[Flutterbyme]

Hi ,We are 21

[TaraMaiden]

Hmmm.... I figured....

You're not going to like me for saying this, but....

 

Really, try not to sweat it.

You're both young, immature, and inexperienced.

 

And before you bite back, by 'immature' I don't mean stupid, dense or thick.

I just mean exactly that.

You are barely adults, out of your teens, and still very much in a formative stage, biologically.

 

And 'Biologically' it's a pretty certain thing that he's a lot more immature than you are.... Girls in general, tend to 'grow up' a little quicker than guys....

Everything is hugely magnified as being 'do or die' at the moment, but honestly....

 

He's just being a bit of a jerk, and frankly, you would do better to put this into perspective and know that in a year this won't matter a single bit.

 

So truly, try to shrug it off now, and just understand that 'young love' hurts more than you think it ever will, precisely because it's 'young'.

 

In time, this pain will fade, and the importance will evaporate....