maturityassets Posted May 7, 2013 Posted May 7, 2013 Like many, some think that the rebounding will solve there problem of getting over their ex. My first love recently dumped a month and a half ago and while originally we ended on the greatest of terms, in the last few weeks we did some nasty things to get each other jealous and frustrated, which started a few weeks ago when I went to pick up the last of my things (even though we had one of the most mature and understanding relationships, hurt feelings and jealousy got the best of us). We finally had some real closure of saying that we really need our space and that the most we ever could be again is just friends (even though before we both had a sliver of hope that one day when she was ready we could maybe work it out). Now in this time I met someone else. I hardly knew them but she initiated contact with me and I flirted back till eventually we decided to hang out and started dating from there. She is an amazing person, she is much more mature than my ex (even though she is younger than ex), she has the same values of me, she is head over heels for me, and she reads me so well that she knows when I need a break from any intimacy (kissing so far). We decided that we will take things really slow. She understands why perfectly and she really hopes that we do work out. We don't hang out very often, maybe once every one and a half weeks. We flirt a lot through text. She even asked me to talk about my Ex so I could vent it all out. I like this girl, but I do realize I need time. That a part of my heart still belongs to my ex of course and I'm doing my best to get past that. I threw out everything from my previous relationship, deleted the ex on social networking, and limit contact besides our closure. Just seeing if anybody has ever had experience of a successful rebound? I don't want to consider her one but it seems like the term most used. Will taking it slow allow me to better appreciate her and eventually be open to labeling ourselves as boyfriend/girlfriend?
crederer Posted May 7, 2013 Posted May 7, 2013 It may not be a rebound. 6 weeks is a bit soon but it really depends on your emotional state. Give it a go, the worst that'll happen is it wont work out. How long were you and your ex together? I think about a month for every year of your relationship is decent enough amount of time to move on. But again, it's different for everyone.
Author maturityassets Posted May 7, 2013 Author Posted May 7, 2013 We were in each others lives for over a year (dating and talking initially). Officially labeled as bf/gf for 7 months. There was a lot of investment in the relationship, I had convinced her to go back to college and gave her other initiatives in life (her family loved me and are in awe that she ended our relationship, practically regard her as being an "idiot"). I guess I'm just hurt that after all we went through that her appreciation for me was not enough to overcome her feelings that she HAS to be young before anything serious in life. Its an emotional blow that I shouldn't take personally though. I know its nothing against me and my ex still puts me on this pedestal of being an amazing boy friend that has all the right qualities and pretty much has no flaws (which I disagree with, because I am human and if the last few weeks proved anything, my emotions can take over my maturity). It's just I want to make sure I'm not looking for just an extension from my previous relationship. I want this relationship to be defined by its own characteristics.
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