sigurpol Posted May 7, 2013 Posted May 7, 2013 (edited) Later last year while working at my second job, a new girl came on board to also work there part time. Almost everyone does. We got along really well and normally have a lot fun on our shifts, so it seemed as if we both liked working with one another. Like most people, I don't like asking out anyone I work with and because this place spreads gossip like wildfire, I keep to myself there. Fortunately, I found a new job that can make up for my second part time one and I put in my two weeks. Her and I never speak or text or whatever outside of work until about 3 weeks ago. She threw me a text asking if I could come in for one of her shifts for my last week but I told her I already had plans in town then. She asked where in town, I told her, and she said thats where she was heading IF she could hand this shift off. Told her good luck!- Days went by and I asked her that afternoon if anyone was kind enough to switch with her. She said no, but she's able to get out early so that's a plus. Some time went by until she texted me later in the evening "Are you still at ___?" I said I was and she mentioned the place where she was, right near me and said I could stop by if I wanted to. Eventually I did and it was awesome seeing her. Especially for someone I get along with at my "old" job, it was nice to spend time outside of work. I buy us a round and we hang out all night. She gets wasted, I don't, but she motions me to get in the cab with her and her roommates to go back with them. I spend some time at her place and we chat a little more. She sobers up after a while and offers me a ride back to my car. I tell her it's no worry, I can snatch a cab (she kept complaining that she had to be up early) but she insisted. So I went with it. She dropped me off, hugged her goodbye, told her thanks, and asked if she was interested in getting drinks again this upcoming week. She said sure. Trying to plan this part was annoying to me. I would suggest a day and a time but her answers were never... yes or no answers, sort of coy responses that seemed to dodge my questions. Finally I just said, here's what we're doing: meeting at this place at this time on this day. Ta-da!- Her response was that she's been there before. That was it. I went to the place on our date and was surprised to see her there already. The night was great, it seemed. Shared food, drinks, and we ended up being there for about five hours. Talking the whole time and sharing things about ourselves. Nothing awkward at all. She offered to take me back to my car again. She did and I sort of made a joke about how she's very sneaky with her answers to meet up. They're very 'grey'- she laughed, so that was good. I asked about the weekend coming up and she said sure. Weekend comes and I touch base with her, but she said she forgets what day we planned on and besides, she's really tired from work. Understandable, and we chat for a little bit. But it always comes off as a... like I'm a nuisance when I text her (not just this time, it seems like most of the time). Very short answers, seems disinterested. I know not everyone can be all chippy and happy with texts- especially when you're tired from work-, but it sends a negative vibe to me. This is where I wonder if she's only being nice and agreeing to meet me out because she doesn't know how to say no? I don't know. I mentioned meeting up again and suggested some plans and her reply was "yeah that sounds fun" Almost a week goes by and I don't hear anything from her. I decide to get a hold of her today, ask how work is, etc. Eventually I ask about getting drinks again this week and she says, "yeah sure"- I asked what days could be good, as my new job is still in the works and I have time off. So I don't know... I guess as I type this, things seem normal? I feel like she feels a little weird that we're transitioning from work to not-being-at-work? I feel like she thinks I'm still going to be at the old job? Lastly, I was recently seeing someone a month ago or so and the girl would come in. So maybe she thinks I'm playing two fields? I don't know. Any suggestions as to what I should do if we go out again? Thanks guys. Edited May 7, 2013 by sigurpol
ComeUpOutDaWahta Posted May 7, 2013 Posted May 7, 2013 I'd say you should hang back a bit man. I've known quite a few women like this, and it usually means that they're not interested or just very flaky. Either way, it's probably best you steer clear. You've pretty much been the one doing all the initiating. Just stop contacting her for awhile, and if she doesn't hit YOU up... well, there's your answer. 2
Author sigurpol Posted May 7, 2013 Author Posted May 7, 2013 I'd say you should hang back a bit man. I've known quite a few women like this, and it usually means that they're not interested or just very flaky. Either way, it's probably best you steer clear. You've pretty much been the one doing all the initiating. Just stop contacting her for awhile, and if she doesn't hit YOU up... well, there's your answer. Sounds about right. She got back to me a few hours later after I asked about which days were good and she followed up with something like, "oh, you don't work a lot this week?"- Maybe an attempt at a conversation but it feels forced either way. I also considered maybe she thought she was being a rebound? I thought she MIGHT have known about my recent break up the past month or so and that might be keeping her at bay. But, just a passing thought I had. As of tonight I'll go quiet.
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