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  • Author
Posted
Look at your avatar.

 

Realise this:

 

if it hasn't found you yet - it's because you keep evading it and hiding from it.

 

This is you deliberately limiting your won progress.....

 

 

tara, i`m not

 

i can`t DO more than i can possibly do :(

  • Author
Posted

i really cant do anymore than i am doing

 

god knows what mess i`d be in without my meds! :)

 

aM

Posted

That's the problem.

You're 'doing' too much.

 

What you need to do is to release, accept, let go and let be.

Posted

If you can try to disappear your "expectations," then you won't get disappointed when they are not met. Cheer up, Yas

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted

i have let go

ages ago

i expect nothing

a part of me is telling me thou, that THAT is not right

small scale

but it builds

like a upsidedown pyramid

sooner or later

well , like right now

it`ll collapse

and it has

even with no expectations i know it cant go on forever :(

 

aM

Posted
t

when we slept together she even said to me

i hope you don`t think that we are getting back together

 

Well, at least you know you're a good lay. ;):bunny::bunny::bunny:

  • Author
Posted
If you can try to disappear your "expectations," then you won't get disappointed when they are not met. Cheer up, Yas

 

i`m giving it my all yas

 

aM

  • Author
Posted
Well, at least you know you're a good lay. ;):bunny::bunny::bunny:

haha

 

yeah thats 1 thing

 

shame my head is so ***ced

or else i`d be perfect!

 

aM

  • Author
Posted
That's the problem.

You're 'doing' too much.

 

What you need to do is to release, accept, let go and let be.

 

tara

your right

even with no expectations i am still `expecting` something to happen

 

aM

  • Author
Posted

so what do i do?

aM

Posted

If I told you, you wouldn't do it anyway (hint.... Signature....).

So you'll have to figure a solution out for yourself.

 

because nobody can do it for you.

 

but one things' for sure:

What you're doing now, isn't working.

And continually doing it, expecting a result, is what insanity is all about....

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

"I'm giving it my all yas"

 

"sooner or later

well , like right now

it 'll collapse

and it has

even with no expectations I know it cant go on forever"

 

"and it's tearing me apart"

 

so what do i do?

aM

 

 

Leave "IT" be. Expectations formed in your mind are the IT that is bugging you. Some people call this chemical hallucinatory desire love - and when the IT (the target of out affections - i.e., your wife or ex-wife) and the IT's behaviors do not conform to the expectations of the IT we have designed in our mind (which is normal - as we tend to idealize the people we chemically fall in love with), then there is a disconnect. That is frustrating, and can cause people to do crazy, crazy things! (See popular culture TV show citation below).

 

So, what do you do about IT?

 

Knowledge is key. There is a logical explanation that I just provided to you. I propose that without expectations of the IT, the IT cannot rule your mind. That is the premise I have been operating with and it is working really well for me. What this means is, that you must stop wanting the IT. If you stop want the IT, there is no expectation you can have from the IT, therefore, the IT cannot dissapoint you.

 

[As such -- I think you can agree you do not need the IT to live, correct? You were alive and functioning before you ever met IT. Removing the IT from your mental equasion is math, subtraction, plain and simple when you desolve and resolve IT].

 

I have posted about the addictive qualities of the IT in an earlier post - I think I might have compared the IT to smoking or intervenious drug addiction. If a herion addict continues to put a needle of heroin in their arm, I will they stop their love for herion? If you continue to stimulate your brain's "love" endorphin chemicals by having sex and other contacts with your wife - how do you think you will get past the IT factor?

 

The aformentioned is exactly why the No Contact method is so effective. When you cease contact with the IT, the memories and stimuli to your brain chemicals fade -- it is that simple. No contact makes it much easier to stop having expectations - which you indeed have to have if you are human. But the more distance you put between you and the IT, the less information your brain has to invent expectations. If you "put the petal to the metal," so to speak, and become extremely deliberate and motivated in getting the person out of your head, the IT factor will be history.

 

Techniques I am using:

 

1. NO CONTACT - ABSOLUTELY NONE. (With kids, use a thrird party.)

 

2. Stop Wanting. (Homer)

 

3. Mindfulness ("Letting Go" - when thoughts enter my head)

 

4. GAL (Getting a Life)

 

5. The List (Short bullet points on my phone list that highlight moments/events in marriage that make me cringe - humilation, embarrassment, physical assault, abandonment, horrific verbal assault, etc.). Note: Brain chemicals can override these bad things - so one needs to always have a little review once in a while if the IT factor comes up.

 

6. Owning the Reality of the IT's Character (this may or may not be relevant to you. - Here, you might insert instead, Owning the Reality of Why You Cannot Be Together).

 

Of course, Homer, Homer, & Homer.

 

I hope these thoughts can provide some direction. Yas

 

PS I'm not saying it is easy. And there will be relapses. As the IT may try to yank your chain when you stop contact for real - somehow, I think they feel something in the Universe when you are really serious about eliminating them from your system. I'd like to know Tara's take on that! Anyway -- that has recently happened to me (I saw him do a drive-by while my new couch was being delivered). IT kind of psyched me out, because I have some paranoia, but I recovered.

 

Citation: There was a good TV show on about this concept that inspired me for this post. The show is called "Perception" Season 2, Episode 2: "Alienation." The manic professor guy discusses all the "brain love chemical" business in detail. I always learn a lot from that show.

Edited by Yasuandio
  • Like 2
Posted (edited)

aM - have you ever jumped out of perfectly good airplane just for the hell of it?

 

When you are free-falling, you can't take the weight of baggage with you..you will hit the ground way too fast and not survive. Now the person jumping with you would prefer you left the baggage on the plane, doesn't always happen. Thud!!

 

In mid jump..you can let go of some baggage...so when you hit the ground, it's on your feet...but you never forget where you came from or the challenges. You don't get there until you really heal...can't not have expectations if you are lying to yourself.

 

^^^^^^^^^^^^ Let me rephrase...you had "Hope"...those are expectations.

Edited by trippi1432
  • Like 1
Posted

aM, basically, what you're being told is that what you're doing isn't working.

Change what you're doing - completely.

The 180.

 

Cut off all and every contact with your ex.

All of it.

No exception.

Stop.

Leave.

Desist.

Break it off 100%

 

Got it?

 

No whingeing, no whining, no protest, no argument, no contradiction.

 

Just do it.

  • Like 2
Posted

A long time (ex) poster here did all of the NC stuff; physically eliminating the ex from their life. Yet, on occasion this person would revive the "Why?" questions and mix in hearty dose of "No one will ever love me again" pity.

 

In a series of PMs I asked why not let go completely? Why spool up the emotional merry-go-round every once in awhile for no apparent reason? In the end, this person admitted "that" was all that remained from their relationship; the memories, and the effect it had on them. Giving "that" up would be like the person never existed. The years gone, blanked out.

 

I suspect we all keep a part, no? Even after becoming indifferent?

 

If deep down you're afraid of forgetting her aM, don't be. Like it or not we all live under the same rules of nature. In this way yes; we're only human.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted (edited)
If I told you, you wouldn't do it anyway (hint.... Signature....).

So you'll have to figure a solution out for yourself.

 

because nobody can do it for you.

 

but one things' for sure:

What you're doing now, isn't working.

And continually doing it, expecting a result, is what insanity is all about....

 

my sig has nothing to do with my situation that i`m in

then again maybe it has everything to do with it , but i hope not

i`m not outwardly looking to be with her to be happy

its an inward thing that i have to resolve

with or without her

being with or without her will not change the way i feel

she makes me no more happy than sad

 

it`s my state of mind

aM

Edited by aMguilts
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