gd1039 Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 Are there many people out there that still prefer to wait until a relationship has been established for at least a few months before getting sexually involved or is everyone getting their freak on early (days weeks) after they start dating someone?
humph.. Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 I have slept with 2 guys in my life and both times, i waited about 3 months before sleeping with them. Prior to sleeping together though we did fool around and do other stuff that was still pretty intimate..but that happened after dating for a little while too, i wouldn't get sexual (on any level) with someone on the first couple of dates. for me, it was a conscious decision to wait to have sex both times, to establish a level of emotional involvement and trust...and to know the guy cared enough about me to want these things too.
swtbonita Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 me and my bf waited 7 months, i was 21.. i was a virgin he respected that.. and we're still together 3 years later.. but I would assume i would also wait if i wasn't a virgin.. because i don't want to risk the consequences of jumping in bed too fast.. i like to know that the guy is serious... and would be there if i got pregnant... i want to know if he has been checked for stds.. and i have to know we're doing it for the right reasons...
Jilly10340 Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 It depends how much I like the guy and where I think the relationship is going. I'll never sleep with someone I'm just dating, we have to be in a relationship. The first time I had sex I waited for 6 months. Granted I got started very young and I don't wait nearly that long now, not by a long shot. I do make sure I know how many people he's been with, if he's ever been checked for HIV, things like that before hopping in the sack with him. I think that there's no normal amount of time. It's whatever you're comfortable with and making sure you're safe.
ps123 Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 It depends on the situation, but I generally dont wait too long. Im in my mid 30s and usually date women my age or older. I figure, we're both adults, and if I like the person and she likes me, I really dont see the point in waiting too long. I usually wait between 2 and 4 weeks. I wont just jump into bed with anyone. It has to be someone Im dating and someone I see potential with. I also wont sleep with anyone on the first or second date. Third is pushing it, but I generally wait until at least the 5th date.
Author gd1039 Posted September 24, 2004 Author Posted September 24, 2004 humph - yes i suppose I should have included my own thoughts so here they are. Well, for what its worth, I am a guy and in college. Anyways, I think humph and swtbonita had some good points that agree with how I feel. I prefer to wait until the relationship is establised along with trust and emotional involvement (copying from humph). To me, sex isn't something to do just for fun. As a bad example, I ride my skateboard or my motorcycle for fun, I get sexually involved with someone because we care about each other. So, in the scheme of things, I like to wait until I know its a solid relationship.
savethedrama4allama Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 I won't have sex until they're my boyfriend. Though that can happen rather fast. I just have to know that the commitment is there.
DJ_Dork Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 Originally posted by gd1039 humph - yes i suppose I should have included my own thoughts so here they are. Well, for what its worth, I am a guy and in college. Anyways, I think humph and swtbonita had some good points that agree with how I feel. I prefer to wait until the relationship is establised along with trust and emotional involvement (copying from humph). To me, sex isn't something to do just for fun. As a bad example, I ride my skateboard or my motorcycle for fun, I get sexually involved with someone because we care about each other. So, in the scheme of things, I like to wait until I know its a solid relationship. you think like a woman. are you one of those pussy-whipped types?
savethedrama4allama Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 He just sounds mature to me, DJ DORK.
Jilly10340 Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 yeah, just because he doesn't sleep with everything that walks doesn't make him any less of a man.
Author gd1039 Posted September 24, 2004 Author Posted September 24, 2004 Originally posted by DJ_Dork you think like a woman. are you one of those pussy-whipped types? Your kidding right? Just because I don't have to have my d*ck inside of something to have a good time doesn't mean anything. Believe it or not, there are more important things to do than get laid. And thanks savethedrama, I actually get alot of people that tell me I am mature for my age.
Fayebelle Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 I have to care about the person in a romantic sense- in my wild days- I had a one nt stand- I found it unfullfilling and not something I'd care to repeat So we have to have mutual feelings and a commitment- I don't think you can count how many days, wks, or months it takes to establish that- each relationship is different. I've had BFs for 6 months and never felt close enough to sleep w/them. Then again my current BF and I moved in 2 months after we started dating. It all depends on the relationship.
jqbnchick Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 well me personally i said i would never have sex with a person i wasn't in love with that theory changed unexpectedly 2 month ago ive been with three guys my whole life (im 21 ) my first was my boyfriend/bestfriend/fiancee n bestfriend for 3 yrs and and we had been together in a relationship for 1 yr before we had sex my second was my second love we were togther for 8 month b-4 we had sex we was together for 3 yrs and this last guy well it was a mistake the first night we met we had sex (technically) i was drunk to the point of not even being able to talk move or anything. so i decided to have sex with him after that in order to know what it was like to know why men go ahead and have sex with so many females and not feel anything for them the sex with this last guy was incredible ( partly because he is 7 yrs older than me) and my ex learned everything with me but regardless it wasn't the same i feel dirty used betrayed. its not the same feeling as when your in love with that person so in conclusion me for my personal experience i would never have sex again with someone i didn't love love=x amount of time
YellowLioness Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 He's just bitter and angry at women. At least, that's what I get from the rest of his posts. Dork, if you want to go sleep with alot of girls, go for it. It won't make you a better man.
Author gd1039 Posted September 24, 2004 Author Posted September 24, 2004 Originally posted by YellowLioness He's just bitter and angry at women. At least, that's what I get from the rest of his posts. Who, me?
Jilly10340 Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 He'd still be a man, just with a wh*re on the end of it.
YellowLioness Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 Silly gd, not you. Dork! I don't like what's he says. Sorry you thought it was you!! *hug* As for me, I waited...was it three days? Before my now fiance and I had sex. We weren't dating. Let's see, that was August 10th of last year, and we started dating on the 31st of August of last year... But, there is a long story in that. We sort of had the love at first site thing going on. Still do, actually. But, he's the only guy I've been with in a year. I think it's important to know right off the bat whether you are sexually compatible with someone.
DerangedAngel Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 I don't wait long. But, yes, some people still do. -DA
kellydontwanttasleep Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 i wait till i see the test results
alicia24 Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 i've been dating this guy for a few months and we have kissed./ he shows nothing but respect for me.
faux Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 Originally posted by gd1039 Are there many people out there that still prefer to wait until a relationship has been established for at least a few months before getting sexually involved or is everyone getting their freak on early (days weeks) after they start dating someone? My girlfriend is a twenty-two year old virgin. We have discussed sex far ahead of time, and she would feel comfortable waiting three more months (The twenty-ninth of this month our relationship will be three months old). I've never done this before, and I think it would be good for me. I want to be able to share something that is supposed to mean something with a person I really care about, and have been through a lot with; I've never had that before.
Kat Posted September 24, 2004 Posted September 24, 2004 my partner and I waited around 3 mths. I had never waited before It was the best thing we ever did. It mades us a lot closer, imho. That doesn't mean that we didn't get hot and heavy and so close it wasn't funny
honey2005 Posted September 25, 2004 Posted September 25, 2004 I've never had sex even though I've had several serious boyfriends. I can't see myself having sex with someone after dating them for only a few months. I'm really a long term kind of girl and I think I'm going to wait until I'm married.
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