PondJumper Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 I posted this in the dating section but now I am realizing this may be a better area... Ok, I have a best GF. We use to live in the same state but I moved about 4 years ago. We still keep in contact and I consider her one of my best friends. She broke up with her fiancé a couple of years ago and they had been together for a few years. I thought they would get married at some point but it quickly turned to postponing the wedding and just basic communications issues. He proposed to her.. she got a big ring, bought the dress but ended up moving out of their place and into her own place. They tried to fix it but inevitably, it didn't work. Fast forward a couple of years and now my friend is IN BLISS with a new guy(read:hormonal bliss) She met this guy on St Patricks day of this year and she is already planning on moving in with him. OMG. As her best friend, I WANT to say something but I feel a resistance there. I have only asked her to not make any life decisions for at LEAST 6 months. Her response was "Eff that! I'm too old for that $hit" and she has said he is the one and that now someone has finally offered her money for her unworn wedding dress, she wants to keep it for when she marries this guy. I have not met him but from what she says, he feels the same way. He is keen on saying "I want to take care of you for the rest of your life" over and over.... that she doesn't have to "worry about anything" and she says they click so much they finish each other's sentences blah blah blah. He has already taken her on a 6 day all expense (first class airfare) flight to Mexico. He pays for EVERYTHING. He seems to like to "throw" his money around a bit and brags about the Lamborghini is going to buy. He is part of a start up and just got promoted. I don't know how much he makes and neither does she (um, isn't this something you should know before you move in with someone?) She said champagne was flowing on the vacation and they were "so good together" She was worried as to what her parents, his parents and her friends are thinking because I am guessing this is all so fast? She JUST bought a condo and hasn't even unpacked the boxes..now they are going to his place. Just for the record she is 35 and he is 33. So, as a 43 year old... watching this... I don't want to be the poo poo friend and I am trying to be supportive here but... how do you tell your friend be careful but not make her mad because she won't "have it" told to her? Maybe they will live happily ever after but... IDK... advice?
steveT95 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 I think you need to mind your own business, you're her friend not her mother. Focus on your own life a bit more and concentrate on yourself, you'll be happier for it. The only way she will learn is by making her own mistakes. It will either go sour and she will be wiser for it (and more likely to find true love next time) or it will go great and she will be happy. It is her life and her choices, if you want to be a supportive friend, support her decisions and be there for her if it goes badly. 1
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