jenn_64 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Hi there, it has been two months since the break up. My ex has not contacted me in two months. Last thing he said to me was we had to move on with our lives but it wasn't goodbye it was "see you later." I haven't seen him or heard from him since. He has disappeared on social media. Needless to say I still have hope we will come back from this and learn from our mistakes? Does him not contacting me mean he has moved on already?
all_cats_rgray Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 "see you later" means I'm going to go **** around and I know you want me so when im down ill **** you and dump you. Okay that sounds bitter.. But really WHO does that. WHO leaves someone hanging. I'll tell you the type of person that does that. Its a immature dick that wants to keep you around well they "figure" stuff out? THIS is BS. ITS A DICK move. AKA, hes a DICK. Yes he has moved on. If he does not want to be with you and work on your relationship, he's moving on. 2
tinker683 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Hey, No...it just means that you two aren't talking to each other so that you can both have time to let it go. It sounds to me though like you're still clinging judging from what you wrote. The way I see it, you have two options 1) Let it go. Realize your relationship is over and begin the long, hard process of moving on. 2) Break NC and attempt a reconciliation which could potentially result in getting back together....or in him rejecting you and you getting crushed again. Do whatever it is you feel you need to do. I broke NC 3 times and the 3rd time I discovered she was with someone else and that *REALLY* hurt. But...I'm glad I did though. It was horrifically painful but I needed to learn, via hard knocks, that total NC really is the best way to go. But that's me.
Author jenn_64 Posted May 4, 2013 Author Posted May 4, 2013 "see you later" means I'm going to go **** around and I know you want me so when im down ill **** you and dump you. Okay that sounds bitter.. But really WHO does that. WHO leaves someone hanging. I'll tell you the type of person that does that. Its a immature dick that wants to keep you around well they "figure" stuff out? THIS is BS. ITS A DICK move. AKA, hes a DICK. Yes he has moved on. If he does not want to be with you and work on your relationship, he's moving on. Friends and family say the same as you. He did say he was tired of being hurt and felt "abused" by me. At times I think that was a bunch of bullcrap because I was always there when his family did messed up things to him. He's not the sweet guy I once knew anymore. He seemed fine up until the Friday he exploded and broke up with me.
Author jenn_64 Posted May 4, 2013 Author Posted May 4, 2013 Hey, No...it just means that you two aren't talking to each other so that you can both have time to let it go. It sounds to me though like you're still clinging judging from what you wrote. The way I see it, you have two options 1) Let it go. Realize your relationship is over and begin the long, hard process of moving on. 2) Break NC and attempt a reconciliation which could potentially result in getting back together....or in him rejecting you and you getting crushed again. Do whatever it is you feel you need to do. I broke NC 3 times and the 3rd time I discovered she was with someone else and that *REALLY* hurt. But...I'm glad I did though. It was horrifically painful but I needed to learn, via hard knocks, that total NC really is the best way to go. But that's me. Yes, you are very right. Sadly, a part of me is still holding on. I really feel like things weren't supposed to end this way. Those options make sense. However, I should mention I broke NC about a week and a half after the break up in hopes of getting back together. Maybe it was too soon or something but he rejected me saying he meant it when he broke up with me and we had to move on with our lives. He said to stop contacting him because it was just hurting him more. He also said that message would be the last message he would be sending me. I haven't heard from him or seen him since that. I also have respected his wishes and not contacted him since.
Silly24 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Sometimes you know you need to move on and that's not possible when you still see/talk with the "ex". I know I'm moving on and I cannot interact with him ever again.
Author jenn_64 Posted May 4, 2013 Author Posted May 4, 2013 Sometimes you know you need to move on and that's not possible when you still see/talk with the "ex". I know I'm moving on and I cannot interact with him ever again. That's what I'm scared of the most. That he is thinking what you just said right now. I still have hope though.
cavalier99 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Of course he has moved on. He basically told you hes never contacting you again and it is OVER. Believe him. You are but a passing thought right now. Sucks huh?. Unfortunately that is how it is. When they leave it is because they want out and are relieved. Like woooo hoo!!!!. I finally did it and ended it. Lol The last thing they want is to get back together. Sorry this sounds harsh but the best thing you can do is kill ALL HOPE. Hope will totally mess up your recovery. Stay NC and kill hope and youll get better. The goal now is indifference not thinking about if they will come back. Rock on! Cav
Author jenn_64 Posted May 4, 2013 Author Posted May 4, 2013 Of course he has moved on. He basically told you hes never contacting you again and it is OVER. Believe him. You are but a passing thought right now. Sucks huh?. Unfortunately that is how it is. When they leave it is because they want out and are relieved. Like woooo hoo!!!!. I finally did it and ended it. Lol The last thing they want is to get back together. Sorry this sounds harsh but the best thing you can do is kill ALL HOPE. Hope will totally mess up your recovery. Stay NC and kill hope and youll get better. The goal now is indifference not thinking about if they will come back. Rock on! Cav Yes, all of this is true. Just found out through a mutual friend that he totally thinks of me in a negative way and it talking a lot of smack about me. Sucks because he accusing me of using him and other horrible things that we both know deep down are a bunch of lies. I was a good girlfriend.
cavalier99 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Yes, all of this is true. Just found out through a mutual friend that he totally thinks of me in a negative way and it talking a lot of smack about me. Sucks because he accusing me of using him and other horrible things that we both know deep down are a bunch of lies. I was a good girlfriend. Sorry Jenn. Im sure you where a great GF. And doesnt seem fair that they would talk sh*t. unfortunatley they often justify the BU in their mind to be able to pull the trigger. who knows later he may feel guily or even just remeber the good parts. But it really doesnt matter. Thats why NC is sooo important. Better to not know anything. BUs just plain suck. On the postive side you can use this as motivation to move on and kill any false hope. Youll get there. Cav
Author jenn_64 Posted May 5, 2013 Author Posted May 5, 2013 Sorry Jenn. Im sure you where a great GF. And doesnt seem fair that they would talk sh*t. unfortunatley they often justify the BU in their mind to be able to pull the trigger. who knows later he may feel guily or even just remeber the good parts. But it really doesnt matter. Thats why NC is sooo important. Better to not know anything. BUs just plain suck. On the postive side you can use this as motivation to move on and kill any false hope. Youll get there. Cav Yeah I feel like he is justifying the break up in his mind that way to help him move on. I know this will definitely help me move on with my life.
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