BLS Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 Well 5 weeks post break up. 17 days NC. Was a 2.5 year relationship. I've started making new lady friends in the past few days and they're all generally nice people. I feel as if one or two may be interested in me. However I have two problems now; 1. I've forgotten just how to tell to what degree a girl's digging me (if at all!) 2. I find them slightly below moderately attractive (on all fronts, including personality, looks, etc) I am still not over my ex, but I feel better than I did a month ago. I'm not sure if these girls can be helpful in getting over it or just make me more upset. Should I proposition a date with one of these ladies or just continue talking/flirting with them?
ViciousCycle Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 I think people have varying views on this. Some think casual dating, or even hooking up, can benefit you in moving on. Others, like myself, would tend to think that you shouldn't date unless there's some sort of potential with the person. The biggest lesson I learned after my previous relationship is not to settle anymore. I don't want to date just to date. I don't want to be with someone just because it will boost my ego or make me feel some comfort. That is all temporary and just puts a band aid on the larger problems I have. More importantly, it will delay me from finding what I truly want. On the other hand, there aren't a lot of cures for loneliness that I have found. So I wouldn't fault you if you wanted to date someone even if you weren't 100% into it. 2
lonewalker Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Glad u r following his logic. Just to add. They r also humans. Have the same feelings as us. Feel hurt too. Imagine the pain when someone else used u as a tool for theirbhealing and u pour ur heart into a relationship with them. Clearly u can feel the pain. So dont try this on others. Becoz they will feel the same hurt as u. Just make sure u r on the right footing before getting into another relationship again. No matter how hurt u r, dont hurt others who has done nothing to deserved this just becoz u feel like ****. 1
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