Curlyj Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 Well, I did it. I told my fiance the truth. I feel so sick about it, but I hope it was the right thing to do. It doesnt feel like it right now, but he deserved the truth before we go any further. I dont know what will happen now. We havent talked much...he didnt have anything to say to me right now. He needs some time. I truly do hope him and i can work through this. And if not? Well, it is what it is. I will deal with whatever comes my way. I deserve it all. Ugh.
youngnlove89 Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 Well, I did it. I told my fiance the truth. I feel so sick about it, but I hope it was the right thing to do. It doesnt feel like it right now, but he deserved the truth before we go any further. I dont know what will happen now. We havent talked much...he didnt have anything to say to me right now. He needs some time. I truly do hope him and i can work through this. And if not? Well, it is what it is. I will deal with whatever comes my way. I deserve it all. Ugh. At least you have a clean conscious now. Good for you, I respect that. He has every right to know this before you get married. And I think in the end, he will respect you more for that. You are a strong unselfish woman. That's a good thing.
Author Curlyj Posted May 3, 2013 Author Posted May 3, 2013 I feel pretty selfish. I acted pretty selfish for a long time. But now is my time to fix that! He is such a good guy, its killing me that he is hurting so bad right now.
ThatJustHappened Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 I feel pretty selfish. I acted pretty selfish for a long time. But now is my time to fix that! He is such a good guy, its killing me that he is hurting so bad right now. No...if you were being selfish, he was being selfish too. Maybe I'm misinterpreting your post but it sounds like you think he's a better person than you are but he's not. You both made the mistake. You are atoning for your mistake now and that's admirable. Big hugs and bunnies for you. :bunny:
Goodbye Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 I feel pretty selfish. I acted pretty selfish for a long time. But now is my time to fix that! He is such a good guy, its killing me that he is hurting so bad right now. Good job coming clean! I'm not familiar with your story though...were you an OW to someone while being engaged? Do you hope to still marry your fiancé? I hope things start to heal and you are happy.
dichotomy Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 I truly do hope him and i can work through this. And if not? Well, it is what it is. . I scanned a few posts of yours. This statement seems to echo your feeling in general - you can go one way or the other. To me that says you should end it. If you guy is not "the one" the "alpha male" for you. Then let him go. I think maybe that's why you told him as well - you want him to let you go. Being a nice guy, a good man, and father is not enough - he needs to be the one for you. I could not tell from your posts, but it sounds like while you are engaged to him - you are essentially in a kind of "common law marriage". That is you have kids from/with him and share a house?
Author Curlyj Posted May 3, 2013 Author Posted May 3, 2013 My story is i once dated a MM when i was single. He left his marriage and we have since been together for 10 years and have two children together. We live together, are engaged, and are considered common law. I started seeing a single OM 3 years ago. He ended it about a month ago. And i decided to come clean to my fiance. Hope that helped clarify a few things
Author Curlyj Posted May 3, 2013 Author Posted May 3, 2013 Glad you have the truth out in the open. I am glad too, but this really sucks.
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