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Do men find shy women appealing or not?


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Posted

What do you think about shy women? Do you find it cute or annoying?

 

What does shy mean to you?

 

Would you rather dae a shy women with little confidence ( not insecure but jus not confident) or would you rather a confident and assertive woman who can take care of herself.

 

Thoughts

Posted

I have a very animated, open personality. So, for me, it would be difficult, not impossible to date a shy woman. :)

 

This is one of the reasons why I speak to my prospective dates over the phone before meeting for a couple of days at least. Want to get a feel of how she is....conversational, open, guarded....

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Posted
What do you think about shy women? Do you find it cute or annoying?

 

What does shy mean to you?

 

Would you rather dae a shy women with little confidence ( not insecure but jus not confident) or would you rather a confident and assertive woman who can take care of herself.

 

Thoughts

 

I'm a little shy but come out of my shell as I know someone.

I find this fine in a woman, maybe at times even a little endearing.

 

If she is overly shy... well... it's not a BIG turnoff but girls like this often have "reasons" for not opening up and eventually tell you they are as they are for having "issues". They tend to attract equally unconfident guys who don't know their way around women and in turn think they are a knight in shining armour who can "save" the girl... usually makes for fairly unhealthy relationships.

 

If it's just a little shyness around new people... its no big deal for me.

If it's something deep rooted, I'd think she needs to resolve the real issue than date me.

Posted

I love shy women, to me they are more attractive than the outgoing social butterfly's

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Posted
I'm a little shy but come out of my shell as I know someone.

I find this fine in a woman, maybe at times even a little endearing.

 

If she is overly shy... well... it's not a BIG turnoff but girls like this often have "reasons" for not opening up and eventually tell you they are as they are for having "issues". They tend to attract equally unconfident guys who don't know their way around women and in turn think they are a knight in shining armour who can "save" the girl... usually makes for fairly unhealthy relationships.

 

If it's just a little shyness around new people... its no big deal for me.

If it's something deep rooted, I'd think she needs to resolve the real issue than date me.

 

 

How is it endearing?

Posted

It really depends on the guy. But in general, more guys will go for the outgoing, friendly ones. But quantity doesn't matter. You only need one great guy at the end of the day. In that case, I don't see being shy being a problem at all, but make sure you find a guy who sees it as a positive thing, not a negative thing. As long as he appreciates your shyness, it's a good match.

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Posted
I love shy women, to me they are more attractive than the outgoing social butterfly's

 

What exactly do you like about them? Do you feel the need to protect them or "save" then? Does it make you feel more manly?

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Posted
If you're not confident aren't you insecure otherwise you would be confident.

I used to be one of those shy guys and I had issues but I fixed a good amount of them.

 

What did you do? How did you overcome your shyness?

Posted
How is it endearing?

 

For me personally, I find shyness endearing because it speaks to a certain humility in a person. Obviously, there are extremes to shyness, which can certainly be a turnoff. As long as the shy woman opens up more once they get to know a person, I personally don't see it as a negative.

 

I'm not speaking for Keenly, but from my own perspective -- I don't feel the need to protect or save them, nor does it make me feel more manly. I've just always preferred someone much more grounded and down-to-earth, and many of the more "shy" women I've met have fallen under that category.

Posted (edited)

I must add that I make a distinction between inherently reserved and "initially" shy. I understand that some are a little guarded when meeting a stranger and that it takes time to open up. I understand that and appreciate that. But, there's also a period of time when you realize if ones "shyness" is an integral part of one's personality. For me, I need and want someone who is open, can engage in conversation regarding a wide variety of topics and interests. I prefer women with a passion for life, a cause, etc. I am involved in environmental issues, healthcare, public speaking, eating healthy, running, extreme hiking, camping...everything I do is intense. So, would really like to find someone like me.

 

That's just me. :)

Edited by soccerrprp
Posted

Shy and insecure are two completely different things. They have nothing to do with each other.

 

I generally like shy women, but it depends on how she presents it. Shy people often come across as conceited or snobby.

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Posted
Shy people often come across as conceited or snobby.

 

Really? You believe this?

Posted
Really? You believe this?

 

Shy people can often be perceivedas being snobby or aloof. It certainly doesn't mean that's actually how they are. Unfortunately, some people only go by first impressions and don't really proceed from there.

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Posted
How is it endearing?

 

I just mean that when a girl comes across as a little shy or modest it can seem a little cute sometimes.

Some girls act very brash and forward these days and a girl who doesn't act that way can sometimes be attractive to some guys.

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Posted
What do you think about shy women? Do you find it cute or annoying?

 

What does shy mean to you?

 

Demure == cute.

 

Other forms of shy == makes me disinterested in dating her.

Posted

This is a great question!

 

Personally, I don't work well with shy women. I'm an energetic, loud, outgoing personality which does not tend to work well with them.

 

Shy women can view my personality is overbearing because of how extrovertive I am.

 

However, I'm enamored by shyness. I view them as mysterious, which makes me want to learn more about them. For the most part I'm able to get them to crawl out of their shell after a brief amount of time.

 

But at the same time, if they are too shy...I lose interest VERY quickly. I literally become bored and move on.

 

It's a fine line, but it depends on what I see in the individual that will ultimately make me pursue or not.

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Posted

Honey, just take me with you. After half an hour of me, EVERY guy will want a shy woman. :D I am lacking both a brain-to-mouth filter AND a volume adjust.

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Posted
What do you think about shy women? Do you find it cute or annoying?

 

What does shy mean to you?

 

Would you rather dae a shy women with little confidence ( not insecure but jus not confident) or would you rather a confident and assertive woman who can take care of herself.

 

Thoughts

 

I'd date either type as long as we got along and had enough in common.

 

Shy doesn't bother me...it's when she's royally insecure that it bugs me. Had one girl I dated who would get herself drunk and cry herself to sleep...while I'm laying there next to her! Had one ex also who seriously needed therapy.

 

A shy girl can be quite cute...even ideal for introverted men. Just as long as she's not carrying loads of baggage.

Posted

Shyness is OK. I like some tendency toward submissiveness. But I wouldn't like to discover that a shy g/f actually were afraid of me or afraid to be open. I used to see someone who was actually too submissive. It gets boring to have someone with no pluck whatsoever.

Posted
Shyness is OK. I like some tendency toward submissiveness. But I wouldn't like to discover that a shy g/f actually were afraid of me or afraid to be open. I used to see someone who was actually too submissive. It gets boring to have someone with no pluck whatsoever.

 

What if they're voluntarily submissive when it comes to some certain things? :o

Posted
What if they're voluntarily submissive when it comes to some certain things? :o
That's generally good. It's nice to get cooperation. But there comes a point where one starts wondering just what is going on in her head that she does nothing but yield. I actually saw this fwb for a long time--like 8 years. She lived with a long distance truck driver and wanted some side dick with me. What's a single guy to do?:rolleyes: I did however take breaks in seeing her when I had other relationships that I hoped would be lasting. I'm not a player like that--juggling lies. But it's OK for shy-girl. She just wants some man. That I have to give. I gave her man and more man. :)
Posted

If a girl is shy, how am I supposed to know that she's interested?

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Posted

It's obviously much easier for a female to get away with shyness.. And much more likely to be seen as "endearing", for whatever reason. It is what it is.

Posted
If a girl is shy, how am I supposed to know that she's interested?

 

I think shy girls can be cute just like more outgoing girls. It is just a lot harder to get to know them. It takes a lot of effort to pull them out of their shell.

 

So I don't think whether they are "appealing" is as much of a concern as the approachability issue is.

Posted
I think shy girls can be cute just like more outgoing girls. It is just a lot harder to get to know them. It takes a lot of effort to pull them out of their shell.

 

So I don't think whether they are "appealing" is as much of a concern as the approachability issue is.

As you said, it can be a lot of effort to pull them out and I don't really see a reason to bother.

 

It's hard enough already to tell if non-shy girls are interested and working extra hard to work on a girl that is cold and non-communicative doesn't make any sense.

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