thr1986 Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 I have been with someone for the past year. We very quickly hit it off amazingly. I absolutely, positively, love(d) her like nobody i've ever loved before. I got a new job across the country and she moved with me. We talked about the future, a family, marriage, everything and I was completely on board with it all. I started to realize however, a couple of months ago, that she lies ALL THE TIME about small things. She would lie about what she ate for dinner the night before, or who she was going to lunch with (even if it was not someone she needed to lie about). I started looking into pathological liars traits and she is a perfect fit. She has been married two times (before 25 years old) (her and I are both 26). She says that her most recent ex husband was cheating on her and he had his own porn site. She said she was on his computer and in the history found his site with pictures he was taking with other girls, ect. It just seems a little bit outrageous. All the reading i'm doing about the condition of a pathological liar says that this type of behavior is common. They may claim to have been treated poorly in a previous relationship, but usually they were the one who did the dirty deeds. its all beginning to make sense now. She has strange relationships with older wealthy men. I think she has probably been unfaithful to me with them. The final straw was when I overheard her on the phone with a friend back where we just moved from telling him that I was abusive and that she needed to get out of here. When I asked her what she was talking about to him she did not have an explanation and just started to cry and then went on to tell me she wanted to be with me and loved me and didnt mean anything she said to him. BOTTOM LINE I just need to leave her as she has a SERIOUS problem with who she is and her lieing is out of control. I still love her though and honestly I would give anything for her to be normal and for us to spend our life together. It just breaks my heart. I have tried to talk to her about her lies but she gets so defensive and denies it all so quickly that I can never get anywhere with her. It genuinely just crushes me to have to not talk to her everyday anymore and ignore her. Im having a really tough time.
GG3 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Here's a question. If you are wrong about her being a liar then you could be emotionally abusive. How do you know for sure that she is lying about the things you say she is lying about?
HumptyDumpty Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 telling him that I was abusive and that she needed to get out of here. Wow. That's quite a chunk there! Did you talk to her about this in detail? I mean, if I'd be a handsome guy and I'm accused of this....first of all I would want to know why! I mean, a girl can go to the police for this, so it's not something one would joke about! Yeah, know the reason, since everyone reacts differently! I'm more the emotional type so some jokes can hit me quite hard! There's not only physical but mental abuse too... Well, I suppose you did everything right and you treated her like a sweetheart! Then... That's cruel what she is doing to you (and I'm not talking about her ex-husbands, they don't count in this story)! I believe this can be a serious illness so she def needs a treatment! What did her family say if you had the chance to hear them? I guess that everything you do would be wrong, so it's important to stay away from her unless she doesn't seek therapy!
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