Art_Critic Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 Are you being too picky? Sorry but yes. I don't think the OP is being too picky.. have you ever watched two people who text too much communicate ?.. let me help you.. they don't... Verbal communication is essential in a relationship and if it starts out without any then where is the expectation that communication bar will ever be raised.
Estate Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 (edited) I don't think the OP is being too picky.. have you ever watched two people who text too much communicate ?.. let me help you.. they don't... Verbal communication is essential in a relationship and if it starts out without any then where is the expectation that communication bar will ever be raised. This guy simply sent a text asking her out as far as we know. So yes, some people like to be "old fashioned" and like a guy to call but this is 2013. If I just met a girl, I'll shoot a few texts back and forth and if she's up for meeting, great. If she expects me to "work" for her when I don't even know her and wanting to make the effort by meeting her IN PERSON then I find it very unattractive when she starts acting this way. I'm a busy guy, I meet lots of people. If I want to meet a girl and keep my Friday night open to meet and get to know her, I don't have time to spend hours on the phone with every girl I meet. I want to meet them IN PERSON and get to know them that way. The phone is only a tool get set up a meeting, not a way of getting to know them. I find talking on the phone for long periods to be weird anyway. I hate communicating with people I'm not speaking to face to face. Some women have a terrible sense of entitlement. If I like a girl, I ask her out. Get to know her there. If I like her more after that I'll want to see her again in person. Phoning, texting, emailing... none of that helps to actually get to know someone and I don't see why some women expect men to overdo things for them when they don't even really know them. Edited May 4, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1
lovinglife1 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 Unfortunately this is the way of the world. Infact some people actually DON'T like to talk on the phone before really knowing someone. Being "irked" by a text invite is just being old fashioned. I know some people hold other to "standards" but this is a social norm now. It doesn't reflect anything on his part. Would I do it? Yes, early on everything is done via text. Calling someone for a date is something that was done when you had no option but to call a girls housephone and her dad would answer. This is 2013. It actually "irks" me more when girls actually get upset over this. When I know the person and have a reason to have a phone conversation, I will call them. Is there a difference between those two ways of asking someone out? Nope, absolutely not. Are you being too picky? Sorry but yes. I agree; texting to ask someone out is a social norm. I prefer it actually! I am always on the go or busy at work, and don't have time to talk on the phone! It's much easier if a guy asks me out via text because it takes only 10 seconds to reply, not 10 minutes of small talk while he gets up the nerve to ask me out. I save the verbal communication for our dates. The phone calls also come later, when I am getting serious with someone. I am old-fashioned as well, but you have to know when to compromise. I rather save my old-fashioned standards for the bedroom (ie, I don't sleep with just anyone and when I do, it takes time to get there.) OP, if I read correctly, you rejected his in-person verbal offer for a 2nd date during the first date. Yes, you had other plans, but in his eyes it was still a form of rejection. He probably tried again via text because rejection is easier that way. From what I've read, I get the feeling you aren't really into this guy and anything he does in the future won't be good enough. Cut your ties and don't waste another minute of your time or his.
Taramere Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 ladies, just throwing this out there. For a second date (note, he did not call or text for 5 days after our first date, this really irked me) would you accept via text? Yes, I wouldn't have a problem with it. The only time texts annoy me is when people attempt to have long winded conversations with me via texts as I find texting a bit too fiddly and annoying to be conducive to long chats - but a quick question or a suggestion to meet up via text is fine. I don't really get why it wouldn't be. 1
jeni4566 Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 I would make a joke about it, something along the line if he asks me out via text:"I would love to see you, but would love it even more, if you called to ask me, so I get to hear your sexy voice..." Maybe too much Anyway, I'm just having fun this morning on LS.
bac Posted May 4, 2013 Posted May 4, 2013 ladies, just throwing this out there. For a second date (note, he did not call or text for 5 days after our first date, this really irked me) would you accept via text? men, would you ask a new girl out via text? does it reflect your level of interest? Also, perhaps my xx chromosomes are parsing thru words- but is there a difference between "do you want to meet for dinner?" and "can i take you out for dinner?" Maybe this is the new thing, but as a professional woman in her 30's I'd much prefer someone to call and explicitly ask me out. Am I asking too much? Am I over-thinking this entirely too much? Sure, you accept the date. Let him know that you are really excited about the date. And, you should flake the fake date.
PogoStick Posted May 5, 2013 Posted May 5, 2013 Many women don't like the pressure of a "date" and prefer to be asked to "hang out", even those in their 30s. I went out with a girl 3 times, kissed and held hands every time, yet according to her it was never a date. A rose by any other name is still a rose. Right?
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