ashleym08 Posted May 1, 2013 Posted May 1, 2013 ive been with my bf for about a year, he had been asking me to move in with him for a long time and a few months ago i agreed. thats when things got really bad. in the beginning he was really sweet and putting his all into our relationship. saying i love you all the time, cute texts/phone calls, hand holding, flowers, playing, etc. im aware we passed the honeymoon phase and that things change the longer a couple is together. he used to talk about us getting married someday soon and he would talk about our future all the time. and since we've lived together that subject has yet to be brought up. we have had our share of little fights and everything but the past few weeks has completely changed. ive noticed over the past few months he hardly ever says i love you, he doesnt really touch me unless he wants something... he treats me like a roommate instead of a girlfriend he claimed to want to spend his life with. ive tried talking to him about this several times before. without getting upset i would tell him there are issues we have that we should work on. that we need to learn to compromise and try to see where the other person is coming from. ive told him specifically what is bothering me without accusing him of anything and i honestly want to work things out. but everytime i'd try to talk about our relationship problems he'd just stare at me...and not say anything...and before im even done talking he'll go back to watching tv and ignore me. we've both been very hurt from previous relationships and i get that maybe he doesnt want to get hurt. but we've talked about that subject. and he's the one who asked me to move in with him for MONTHS before i said yes because i wanted him to really think about it and make sure he was ready. i think ive been putting off the inevitable for a long time because i do love him with all my heart, but he breaks mine more and more every day. i know he's not perfect and neither am i. but how can i stay in a relationship with someone i love if they don't care about us? i thought about it and realized i had two choices: i can either accept that this is how he is and learn to live like this, or i can end it. i told him last night i needed a break. i cant fix this by myself and he's not even willing to talk to me about any of this. maybe he really just doesnt care anymore...
TaraMaiden Posted May 1, 2013 Posted May 1, 2013 His communication skills are schytt. Some men don't talk very well. If you can't talk to him - then tell him with actions. I suggest you move out, but if he tries to reconcile, be cautious, and suggest you have to work through this together. Suggest counselling, suggest therapy, suggest living apart while you do this. But maybe he won't care. Maybe he will be indifferent to your moving out. And then, you will have your answer.
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