CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC Posted May 1, 2013 Posted May 1, 2013 If you go into my older post you can see what I've been through with this girl. Multiple break ups and I always allowed her to come back. This last time I insisted that I was through and wouldn't let her back, well I guess that was easier said than done and we again got back together for about the third time. Anyway, this time she really seemed to be proving herself to me, it really seemed that she was changing and our relationship was growing. This past valentines day she begged and begged for me to get her a promise ring. So I did, and shortly after valentines she went cold on me again for lord knows why. I could not keep dealing with this hot and cold behavior so I asked her what it is that she truly wanted, she told me that she didn't know, and when she received the ring (that she begged me for), it scared her. Things were pretty much ended mutually on that day (although I really didn't want this to happen), I told her that it's unfair for me to keep having to go through this. I guess this time was easier for me being that I've had to deal with it a couple of times already, but I still though about her throughout the day and wondered if she thought of me. I have been in full no contact since February, I have been coming on here daily to read others stories, but didn't feel the need to post anymore of my long dragged out love story. I have been having no trouble at all with no contact and can honestly say it had helped me move on. But just yesterday I found out in a rather ****ty way that she has a new bf. Through all of our past fall outs she had never gotten into a new relationship, so this is really hard for me. You always hear about people jumping into new relationships right after a break up but I never thought she'd be the type to do it. I thought she had a little more respect than that after spending so much time together. I have that knot back in my stomach again and feel like im back at square one. Hoping that continuing no contact will eventually pick me back up, this is the first time im actually not able to sleep at night, constantly thinking about things and its weird cause sleeping was never a problem even after the break up. Well I guess im not exactly sure why I posted this, it's definitely a tough pill to swallow. I guess the main thing I can share is that if your ex leaves you and returns, be very cautious about getting back together. You may be looking for that quick fix to heal the pain youre feeling, but there is no reason that they wont leave you again like they did before.
dreamingoftigers Posted May 1, 2013 Posted May 1, 2013 I had a ex where we fell apart and then 7 months later got back together. I didn't trust him anymore. It fell apart a year later, shortly before what would have been our wedding. I've also had the "they're dating someone else right away" experience. That is a 10x punch to the gut. I don't envy you. It does fade. But it takes some time and self-compassion. Cut people off when they treat you poorly while dating. Rigorously screen your partners because even though it may hurt like Hell now, it'll be exponentially more painful down the line. Never be someone's Plan B. 1
Author CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC Posted May 1, 2013 Author Posted May 1, 2013 I had a ex where we fell apart and then 7 months later got back together. I didn't trust him anymore. It fell apart a year later, shortly before what would have been our wedding. I've also had the "they're dating someone else right away" experience. That is a 10x punch to the gut. I don't envy you. It does fade. But it takes some time and self-compassion. Cut people off when they treat you poorly while dating. Rigorously screen your partners because even though it may hurt like Hell now, it'll be exponentially more painful down the line. Never be someone's Plan B. Thanks for the reply, I guess its kinda hard to take in being that this is my first love. Hope to be able to use it as a learning experience. 1
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