juicygirl Posted April 30, 2013 Posted April 30, 2013 I can't shake this feeling I got dumped when I was 5 weeks pregnant with my second baby. Their dad moved away to another country and didn't even come to see our new baby when she was born. He had a lot of excuses because he suffers from depression and it ended after he was told he had suspect bipolar type 1. When we founded out I tried to support him because he said he'd get help and through out the relationship he had unexplained rage but after the diagnosis it all made sense. He wasn't working when we was together,would sleep alot not bond with baby etc it got back. He left to with nothing. amongst other things. He family made the effort to come and visit the our two kids and I said he can come but he decline and went around telling people I was stopping him. When he dumped me, then sent me a lot of threatening and abusive messages, which is weird coz he dumped me,but I changed my phone number because I was pregnant and couldn't take no more.I got adviced and we went to courts, I gained a temporary no contact order and we has access hearing for the kids with he never turned up to but he was gained access if he wanted it.We have mutual friends and I haven't moved so he could always reach me for the kids.We had arrangements with the kids, but he broke them ,said it was all my terms and his not being controlled by me etc I told him pick what day he wants but he wanted to come and go when he pleased etc. Now our baby is 9 months and still hasn't met her. His got a new career grr when we were together I tried everything to get him to do something, anything and he refused and now his training to be a sky diving instructor. His new girlfriend is perfect for him too, she's into science like him and training to be a doctor, she has a son and he always wanted a boy, she throws parties and just seems great. I saw it on facebook, I only looked to see his sky diving photos and saw more then I bargined for. He made me feel rubbish about not having loads of friends and being able to have big fancy parties. In the beginning of our relationship we did things together , then I felt like he just disappeared. I was with the baby and he was out with whoever doing whatever. The new girlfriend is a student doctor so must be smart, I just feel like the poor sad single mum on benefits. I'm re training in september but compared to them I look like a no body. I've been getting out the house more but I haven't met anyone nice in terms of dating. I saw them today on holiday all loved up after two months of dating, she puts everything on her facebook. She is very much like me but almost a better version, she's foot loose and fancy free, partying travelling and really in love with him,,My mum said she looks like you but she's just chinese? Why her grr it's like she has my life and his being better for her but how can he just go off and forget us I feel awful and I hate facebook it's hard not to look now I was doing so well before but when his birthday came around I broke down and started this mad facebook stalking. It's been 17 ish months when does it stop hurting?
bluecrabroll Posted May 1, 2013 Posted May 1, 2013 It ends when you go through the pain, accept it and be neutral about it all. You are a strong woman who is raising 2 children. In order to raise them proper you need to be stronger than what you are now. Avoid Facebook, keep your mind occupied on your kids and invest in them. You have 2 people with you now who will for sure love you very much and shall never betray or hurt you. Facebook augments peoples happiness, I honestly think if you were happy then there is really no need to brag about it on social media. Live for you and your kids and not through him. 1
Author juicygirl Posted May 5, 2013 Author Posted May 5, 2013 (edited) I'm still struggling I think I had delay grieve as I was pregnant, then angry and now I feel the loss after seeing their happy holiday facebook photos of him holding her hand, killed. I've stopped looking I'm going to try my hardest not to, but it's too easy as she lives her life on facebook and post everything, she's one of those people. I know in time I'll be fine. It's all hit me by surprise as we recently started talking again for the kids after a year of no contact. I also don't want to be the bitter ex. Time will heal me. Edited May 5, 2013 by juicygirl error
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