all_cats_rgray Posted April 28, 2013 Posted April 28, 2013 WHEN has it ever gone well. I always think, it will go okay when I'v fallen in love and no longer feel anything for said ex. I'm just bringing this up.. because i f u c k ing miss my ex so much. I feel like if i where to talk to him, the night would never end. And we would have a great time. I know this is a hopeless train of thought. BUT my question is : when you break NC? please tell me how it when. Cause some times I have this idea in my head that we will have a great time. And even if nothing happens from it. We will some how be at peace and understanding. ? So please can anyone tell me their breaking NC stories !!!!!!!!!!!!
shiver23 Posted April 28, 2013 Posted April 28, 2013 Mine's in process. I'll give you an update when (or if) I get a response.
crimsoncurrent Posted April 28, 2013 Posted April 28, 2013 This is not a breaking NC story because, for over 100 days, I maintained NC, but I can relate to your thinking. Since NC, my perspective has changed so dramatically, especially my views on sex and relationships. If my ex and I were to meet, like you, I imagine we would have this elaborate conversation of what we learned and how we've changed during our time apart. But, in my case, because my actions decided the end of the relationship, I wonder if my changes would even matter to her anymore. Sometimes, I'm under the assumption that my thoughts and feelings are of interest to her, but with nearly 4 months of NC, I'm sure it's completely contrary. So, here's a thought experiment: how would you reaction if you broke NC, telling your ex everything, but your ex acted completely indifferent to your feelings and thoughts? How would that make you feel? If you can't even imagine, I would suggest you not break NC.
Am4Real Posted April 28, 2013 Posted April 28, 2013 There are tons of posts in these forums about the horrific experiences of persons who broke NC. There is this tiny-weenie number of positive experiences. That makes the general unscientific odds of "thousands to one" against the notion of a successful outcome. Because the stories you are asking about are a long drawn out synopsis that generally point to the same conclusion as my preceding paragraph, why not simply "trust the odds" and not make contact. But do your own research here on LS if it will make you feel better.
shiver23 Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/389475-these-times http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/390377-these-times-part-deux There is what happened for me. This is definitely an exception, and I know lots of people have been severely hurt by breaking NC. It really comes down to how you two as individuals have reacted to the break up and how you cope with it.
GB25 Posted May 3, 2013 Posted May 3, 2013 Mine has been just short pointless exchanges, bc I feel like neither of us wants to spill the beans on how we feel. Its like an old mexican duel. Example: Her: Hey how you been? Me: Been good, you? Her: No Complaints That was one time after 1month NC- Her: Hey did we order the red or white sauce mussels from the italian place we used to go? Me: It was the red sauce Her: mmm ok i gotta order that again, omg sooo good. Me: You there right now? Her: Yes That was after another 1 month NC Get my drift- pointless exchanges with 0 meaning
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