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How the heck do you recover from this?


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Posted

My back story is posted here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/other-man-woman/389228-he-fooled-me-well#post4834512

 

So my question is this. At this point I just feel numb because I don't really know what to feel and honestly I just don't see the point in moping around about what had just happened. But how the heck do you recover from being played, learning that your whole relationship was a lie, being used, and the thought that you've allowed this to happen? I'm trying so hard not to internalize this whole situation, but I couldn't help but look at myself and think, why?

 

I mean, I have complete closure now, it's as if a huge weight has been lifted off of me because I've had that nagging feeling that something wasn't right these past couple of days. I had been doing well with the whole break-up but at this point I'm just flabbergasted and left wondering how the hell I let this happen and how do I even process such craziness.

Posted
My back story is posted here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/other-man-woman/389228-he-fooled-me-well#post4834512

 

So my question is this. At this point I just feel numb because I don't really know what to feel and honestly I just don't see the point in moping around about what had just happened. But how the heck do you recover from being played, learning that your whole relationship was a lie, being used, and the thought that you've allowed this to happen? I'm trying so hard not to internalize this whole situation, but I couldn't help but look at myself and think, why?

 

I mean, I have complete closure now, it's as if a huge weight has been lifted off of me because I've had that nagging feeling that something wasn't right these past couple of days. I had been doing well with the whole break-up but at this point I'm just flabbergasted and left wondering how the hell I let this happen and how do I even process such craziness.

 

Spend time with any family members and friends who love you.

 

Spend time doings activities that you love.

 

Force yourself to think about today only; don't regret the past and don't worry about the future.

 

Compliment yourself, forgive yourself, be nice to yourself.

 

Just do one thing at a time.

 

Admit that your problem is valid, but at the same time remind yourself that your problem does not involve a death, a terminal illness, a serious physical injury, etc.

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Posted
Spend time with any family members and friends who love you.

 

Spend time doings activities that you love.

 

Force yourself to think about today only; don't regret the past and don't worry about the future.

 

Compliment yourself, forgive yourself, be nice to yourself.

 

Just do one thing at a time.

 

Admit that your problem is valid, but at the same time remind yourself that your problem does not involve a death, a terminal illness, a serious physical injury, etc.

 

Thank you for your reply. And I like the last sentence with putting everything into perspective. I still have my fully intact, fulfilling life with plenty of friends who are there for me. All he has is his harem of women he met online and his cats with no job lined up for him. Once I get all my emotions out I need to remember that no one can ever take from me the worth that I've built up for myself. I can't even shed a tear for him, he's not even worth that. lmao.

Posted
Thank you for your reply. And I like the last sentence with putting everything into perspective. I still have my fully intact, fulfilling life with plenty of friends who are there for me. All he has is his harem of women he met online and his cats with no job lined up for him. Once I get all my emotions out I need to remember that no one can ever take from me the worth that I've built up for myself. I can't even shed a tear for him, he's not even worth that. lmao.

 

It is great that you still have your life fully intact and fulfilling. That is the advantage you have! He does not deserve to have your happiness.

Posted (edited)

Short answer: by focusing solely on your happiness and taking it a day at a time.

 

Sounds like you still have a strong support system. Use that. Focus on your happiness. Learn from and let go of the past while embracing the future. This was only one sucky experience of what's sure to be a more fulfilling life story.

Edited by TearyEyedPride
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