rickyg Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 hi guys, this is my first post and i'm really looking for some advice about my ex. We broke up exactly a year ago and were dating for a year. Our relationship started amazingly well and we were quick to fall in love. The problems started arising 4-5 months into the relationship where I changed and started becoming overly possessive and controlling. My ex was a very social type of girl and made friends very easily whereas on I found it more difficult which in turn made me very jealous and cause unnecessary arguments. I took her for granted and made many fake promises saying that I would change but it never materialised and we ended up breaking up. Around 6 months past and I had dated many women but nothing progressed past a first date. Looking back this was mainly my fault as I was still very much in love with my ex. I decided to contact her, and she agreed to meet up. We met each other regularly for 2 months however, I knew she had her guard up as I was not getting any signals that she wanted to go any further than just meeting up as friends. Stupidly I became impatient and frustrated, and decided that this was not going to happen and said it would be best if we both parted ways. So, another 5 months past and I did not think about her much and I still carried on dating other women thinking I was ready to move on. However, a couple of weeks ago I was having very vivid dreams about her and things started playing on my mind again. Again, I decided to text her to see how she was and we decided to meet again. At this point I wasn't even sure what I was going to say to her when I did see her but I just told her the truth that I was thinking of her and wanted to know if she was ok. She also met my mum and baby niece on the same day and I could tell from her facial expression that some memories were coming back to her as she had a good bond with my mum and niece. We said our bye's and then I knew that I somehow had to get her back. I realised my previous mistakes and I knew I had changed to be the person that she needed me to be. The day after I decided to ultimately do the most stupid thing someone could do which was ask my friend to ask his gf (who was very close to my ex) for their advice. He said that he will ask his gf during the week but within a couple of hours I realised this was something I had to do on my own so I told him not to ask his gf. I didn't thing anything of it until the next day my ex called me fuming that I had spoken to her friend and told me she didn't need the extra stress in her life as she just started a new business and bought a new house. I did tell her that I didn't want to rush things and I just wanted to be friends but she told me to move on. The day after I texted her asking if she would agree to meet just to say our byes face to face rather than doing it through text. Its been a few days and she hasn't responded. Throughout all of the time we have not been together I have tried to move on and I am physically in the best shape of my life but I just cant seem to see past her, we had a very intense relationship and were looking to become engaged when we were together, this is just something that I cant seem to move on from. I still feel as though she has feelings for me but has surpressed them so she can get on with her life. Is there anything I can do?? (sorry for the long winded first post!)
Pisces13 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 There is nothing you can do. The only thing you can do is try your best to move forward with your life. She broke up with you, therefore it is on her to reach out to you about reconciliation, if she want's as much. People on here will you tell you otherwise, but I think that it is ok to keep some hope that one day things will work out for you guys, but what it comes down to is not letting that hope over rule your life, that is what you need to be weary of.
Kobe2345 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 Let go, Learn from your mistakes and Improve yourself and Focus on you, Move on as you two will never get back together... However, if both of your paths does cross once again, she will see the new improved you..
Author rickyg Posted April 26, 2013 Author Posted April 26, 2013 Let go, Learn from your mistakes and Improve yourself and Focus on you, Move on as you two will never get back together... However, if both of your paths does cross once again, she will see the new improved you.. I do get where you guys are coming from, I'm just a little confused why she agrees to meet when she has no intentions of taking things a bit further. It is her birthday next week, I was seriously contemplating getting her a card but I guess that's not a wise idea?
Simon Phoenix Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 I do get where you guys are coming from, I'm just a little confused why she agrees to meet when she has no intentions of taking things a bit further. It is her birthday next week, I was seriously contemplating getting her a card but I guess that's not a wise idea? It's not a very good idea at all.
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