questionlife Posted April 25, 2013 Posted April 25, 2013 Why do some women reject a guy just because they believe a rule that they shouldn't have sex on the second date? Don't they know it hurts his feelings to be rejected even though she says that she wants to have sex?
Ninjainpajamas Posted April 25, 2013 Posted April 25, 2013 Physically/sexually she may want to have sex...emotionally and to protect herself she may not be ready. You shouldn't take this as a personal attack, this isn't about your ego or ability to get her into bed (well it kinda is, but that's not the point!). She wants to take things at a slower pace, once some women engage into intimacy like that then they may start losing control becoming these obsessive psychopaths ...therefore to protect themselves and try to control their "insanity" for loooooove...they try to build more trust, to be comfortable and feel secure. Others just open their legs like ::wham!::, like the popo coming through the door cause you got a meth lab in the basement! 1
veggirl Posted April 25, 2013 Posted April 25, 2013 Your feelings are hurt because a girl wouldn't fk you on the 2nd date? I think you need thicker skin. 2
Maleficent Posted April 25, 2013 Posted April 25, 2013 Why do some women reject a guy just because they believe a rule that they shouldn't have sex on the second date? Don't they know it hurts his feelings to be rejected even though she says that she wants to have sex? Women.are.not.sex.toys. Get a blow up doll? 4
Maleficent Posted April 25, 2013 Posted April 25, 2013 I think he's saying he got rejected because he has a rule no sex on the 2nd date. ....hmm - could be. Can we get clarification on that? lol
Author questionlife Posted April 25, 2013 Author Posted April 25, 2013 Well he wrote that even though they want to have sex with him it still hurts when they reject him. Yes, exactly! Because of some rule they've read in a book somewhere...
Silly24 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 Why do some women reject a guy just because they believe a rule that they shouldn't have sex on the second date? Don't they know it hurts his feelings to be rejected even though she says that she wants to have sex? Good point...she should put out no matter. You're ego is requires it! 2
SJC2008 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 It's because the're actually women out there who want to be wanted for more than, have have more to offer than their vag. 3
Author questionlife Posted April 26, 2013 Author Posted April 26, 2013 Good point...she should put out no matter. You're ego is requires it! It's because the're actually women out there who want to be wanted for more than, have have more to offer than their vag. She said she wanted to have sex, but couldn't on a second date... I'm just wondering why women follow some rules instead of what they say the want?
spiderowl Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 You expect sex on a second date, even though you hardly know the girl? Why not try being human and getting to know her a bit? She might feel you respect her then. She might even start to feel you care about her rather than just want to use her? And you think your feelings are hurt? How do you think she feels being treated like sex is all that matters to you? 2
Hopeless80 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I'm not going to have sex with any guy until I'm ready and feel a real connection with him. It has nothing to do with rejecting that person specifically, but more to do with respect for myself. 1
Silly24 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 She said she wanted to have sex, but couldn't on a second date... I'm just wondering why women follow some rules instead of what they say the want? Sex is lovely, so wanting it isnt' so hard or unexpectted. Now good sex requires trust and she doesn't know you after a few dates. We all put up our best presence during the first dates and it takes a while to get to know someone. It's not all that difficult to comprehend... How old are you?
outsidethebox Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 actually isn't she rejecting herself? You're supposed to be happy to cause her such a conundrum. Be happy. 1
BluEyeL Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 Damned if you do, damned if you dont. . That's how I feel, so instead of reading dating books, now I started to read books on how to live alone and celibate and still be happy. That's the only solution I see. 20 yrs of sex are more than other people had, so I should say that part of my life could be over and should work to accept it. Mr Soul, that's what's depressing. 3
BluEyeL Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 You keep saying this. Please explain. To me personally, the fact that the general expectation is that sex happens very quickly when dating, and both men and women reinforce this style is depressing. I absolutely cannot and will not have sex before emotional intimacy, and for that we need more than 3 or 4 dates. Posters above explained why this is conflicting. Yes, you can end up having a long term relationship that started with sex at dates 1-3, but after how many partners with whom you did ONS or FWB? I'm not up for that at all. If I'm divorced, it doesn't mean I want to go through that. I need somone like tricolors, who is my new idol here So, Mr. Soul, the fact that the only solution I see right now to this conflict in values is to learn to live happily celibate, while still holding some hope that that could change, is a bit depressing. 3
SJC2008 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 She said she wanted to have sex, but couldn't on a second date... I'm just wondering why women follow some rules instead of what they say the want? Oh, my fault. She doesn't want to come accross as easy which I can understand. If you like her just go on some more dates and it'll happen. 1
sillyanswer Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 Dating seems infinitely easier for women. They really have nothing to complain about it. Free meal: Check Countless suitors: Check Determining when and if there will be sex: Check (You're generalizing and so will I...) but they want a relationship.
sillyanswer Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 And since it's really all a numbers game; they have it far easier. I'm sure we've done that particular topic before, but I'll just summarise it by saying that this wasn't universally agreed upon. 1
BluEyeL Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 Dating seems infinitely easier for women. They really have nothing to complain about it. Free meal: Check Countless suitors: Check Determining when and if there will be sex: Check Not sure everyone cares to have a free meal, countless suitors and sex; if these are the goals, yeah, it's easier, but these largely seem more like a man's goals (not every man). In other words, you say that it's easier for women to achieve what YOU, Mr. Soul, want, but is it easier to achieve what THEY each want? Don't think so. And you personally don't seem to have any problems with countless suitors and sex, you just don't get the free meal on top of those 2
BluEyeL Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 I just want a comped dinner. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK? I would definitely give it up if the girl bought me dinner. I'm a cheap date, I guess. :laugh: At least you're funny. 2
Hopeless80 Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 Dating seems infinitely easier for women. They really have nothing to complain about it. Free meal: Check Countless suitors: Check Determining when and if there will be sex: Check Well, clearly I'm the exception to this rule! I couldn't care less if I have to pay my fair share on a date. In fact, I prefer it that way. As weird as this may sound, I don't want a guy who's going to treat me like some goddess. It's just not who I am. I'd rather be more on an equal level. I don't have countless suitors and frankly, I wouldn't want to be hit on at every turn either. I'm not one who finds that type of thing to be very flattering. Quite the opposite really. As for sex... well, I'm not about to give it up to any guy before I'm ready. I couldn't care less if he gets offended or not. There's a thing called self respect. I will always put myself first in that aspect. On the other hand, if I wanted sex and the guy I'm with wasn't ready I'd be more than willing to wait until he is. I certainly wouldn't get offended by it. If you find it that offensive go home and watch some porn to release the frustration. 4
pteromom Posted April 26, 2013 Posted April 26, 2013 She wouldn't have sex on the 2nd date, but she wanted to? She sounds smart to me. The fact that she wanted to says good things about you, and gives you hope for good sex in the future. The fact that she said NO to her desire to do it shows maturity and self-awareness on her part. It only takes being burned once or twice for intelligent people to start making different choices. If she's slept with a guy and he ended up doing the pump-and-dump when she wanted a relationship, you can understand why she wouldn't just jump into sex just to be hurt again. 3
SJC2008 Posted April 27, 2013 Posted April 27, 2013 Dating seems infinitely easier for women. They really have nothing to complain about it. Free meal: Check Countless suitors: Check Determining when and if there will be sex: Check Datin is not easier for women Mr. Soul come on now. It is a proven FACT that dating is just as hard if not harder for women. Source: Loveshack.org 3
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