Its long but heeelp!!

[Kur-Bee]

Ok so 6 months ago. I was really good friends with this guy named Luke in my office, hes 29 and i'm 24, over time we became really good friends. I was seeing someone for 6 months and he was in a 3 year relationship with a young child. Eventually I got offered a promotion so moved companies but we stayed in touch. Luke was going through a bad time in his relationship, (gf had gotten pregnant too soon and they were only staying together for their child.) Soon after we both ended up declaring we were developing feelings for each other so decided it was best to end our friendship before anything happened.

 

4 months later we bumped into each other while out on a Saturday night with friends. We chatted briefly and it turns out we were both now single me 3 months him 2 months, ended our convo there. He text the next day and after a couple of days we met up for a drink to catch up. Had a really great time for the whole night and eventually kissed before leaving, such an anticipated kiss since realising our feelings and it was so worth the wait.

 

We've been going on a number of dates for 2 months since, things have been going amazingly. He texts first everyday and we do have too much contact i'll admit, he was arranging a trip away for my 25th birthday in July and he also kept mentioning how much he wanted me to meet his little boy. We went on a date on Sat 13th we had a great time but I got really drunk, I ended up bringing up where this was going. I could tell I scared him off so much. He basically told me that he was only out of a relationship and didn't want to jump into another (understandable looking at his failed one). But then start bringing up stuff about the 5 year age gap, how it was fun and how he has priorities with his child which I could never understand (ive been nothing but patient, understanding when it came to his child). Nothing was resolved but I ended up going back to his place anyways.

 

The next morning he said he just wanted to forget about it, that we were fine and it was just the alcohol speaking. Things seemed fine and we hung about his for a few hours before I went home. I decided i'd take a step back and give some space and I didn't hear from him for a week. He text to see how I was and we sent texts back and forward. A couple of days later I started a conversation on facebook which was fine but it felt different. Its now been 4 days and I haven't heard anything. He went from texting/ringing everyday to nothing.

 

Have I scared him off completely and should I just walk away or is there anything I can do?

Edited April 25, 2013 by Kur-Bee

[outsidethebox]

After two months of dating why is eveything based on whether he texts you or not? He texted everyday. You asked where it was going, he answered, and you decided to "take a step back and give him some space". You mention starting a thread with him on FB.

 

Have you been texting him and not getting replies? He needs to know you're good after asking that question and instead you went NC depending on what "giving him space" means.

 

You may not want to resume based on your question and his answer. You may want a relationship sooner than he does. You need to decide that and let him know.

[Kur-Bee]

I think we just fell into the routine of him being the one to call and text first as his work schedule is hectic and random whereas mine is set hours Mon- Fri. So he'd call when he got off etc.

 

He's also the type that if I was to text he'd respond anyways even just to be polite. From the day afterwards he knew I was good but I decided to go NC as I didn't want to text him too much and come across even stronger and scare him even more.

 

I just assumed and hoped that it was the way in which the question of where it was going was brought up wasn't the best and that scared him more than the question itself.

 

Until then I was actually fine with our pace and enjoying just dating him, it was him arranging trips in the future and bringing up meeting his son etc that got me over thinking and questioning where it was going.

 

I can just tell things feel off and different the couple of times we've been in contact since.. I just hoped there was some way to redeem it and go back to the way things were.. One can dream though!!

 

Thanks for your reply!

[outsidethebox]

Just let him know everything is good. Do your part to maintain staying in touch and letting him know your feelings. I can't imagine that he wouldn't like that after two months of dating and daily texting.

 

Good luck to you.