StayOrLeave Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 I apologize for the lengthy post but hopefully some of you will take the time to read the post and chime in with some input: Heres some pretty brief overview on the situation: Was introduced to this girl by her sister who is in my pretty immediate circle. We hit it off and kissed a bit on the first night. A week or so later we hung out again and this time we messed around more. When I was introduced to her I knew she was joining the military so we did not start a relationship even though she asked me to start dating her several times (while drunk). She went to basic training and we were writing pretty often. I was going to go to her graduation but time/money did not work out. She went on to the second phase of training where she had access to her phone and we would constantly be talking. She came home from training for a week or so before she gets deployed overseas. We hung out a few times and again asked to start dating but we didnt because of the whole long distance/pointless manner. I see her off at the airport and then dont really hear from her anymore. I thought it was due to the overseas/getting situated. But then about 2 weeks into it I find out shes dating someone else. After about a month or so she contacts me apologizing and whatnot and we start talking again. After about a week of talking again, she breaks up with the other guy and says she messed up and really wants to be with me. I gave her another chance and this time we actually started dating. We would constantly talk via text solely due to phone/computer issues. We finally got the computer issues figured out but she blew me off a few times. We ended up breaking up after 2 months because she couldnt handle the long distance/had to focus on her job. At the time she told me there was no one else and that the sole reason was the distance/work and we could try again later down the road when she wasnt overseas. About a month goes by again where we didnt talk. She then messages me saying that she still sleeps with the stuffed animal I gave her every night. I kind of blew it off and just responded with short answers while she tried to make a conversation asking how I was/what I was up to. We texted a total of 5 texts over the next 2 weeks. Then this weekend I saw a picture of her dorm room with the stuffed animal and since I was drunk I commented about it and she said it was her "favorite snugglebunny <3 :)" Then again since I was drunk I messaged her saying I missed her and she said she missed me too. Then about 24 hours later she tries to start a conversation again and I was short answered. Another day and she messages me again saying how much she misses me. And we have a small conversation, again with short answers and very delayed responses on my end. During this last conversation I end up being a little curious and went digging and I found out shes dating another guy thats overseas with her and this made me furious and which brought me here as Im not sure what I should do now. My options I feel are these: 1) Tell her off/tell her that we shouldnt talk anymore and she should focus on her work and her relationship (she doesnt know I know about it) 2) Cut all contact cold turkey 3) Play along with it and act like I dont know Id like to go with 1 or 2 but I also dont want to make things awkward with our group of friends/her sister. Or when she comes home. Suggestions?
wisernow Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 From what you've written, this relationship is casual at best and the times any real interest is shown involves one or both of you being drunk. I would just press on with your life. The odds of you two having anything meaningful or long term seems remote, based on immaturity and physical distance.
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