markus36 Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 So, the long story is I had a short relationship with someone I was head over heels in love with (but it would never have worked, there was distance involved) – and it’s taken me nearly a year to get over her. About two months ago, I met someone, and we’ve been seeing each other – I really like her, she’s funny, sweet, she’s just right for me, and we’re on the verge of getting serious – I don’t know if I love her yet, but I can see it could become something really good. Then at the weekend, I was in Barcelona on my own – walking along, and I see this incredibly beautiful woman looking at a map – I ask her if she’s lost – we chat, we go for coffee, then for dinner. She invited me back to her apartment, but I didn’t go in, but I know how it could have progressed. Since then, she’s facebooked me, and made it clear she’s interested in me – she’s in Paris, I’m in UK. It was like something from a movie. This woman is so beautiful and I’ve had my head turned. So, this new Frenchwoman has definitely got me over my ex – 100% - but now I have the problem that I have a silly crush on someone who lives in France, when things were going well with my new girlfriend. What should I do? I’m being unfair to my new girlfriend, aren’t I? But, it could go so well.
Treasa Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 Please break up with your current girlfriend. She deserves to be with someone who is only into her.
Author markus36 Posted April 24, 2013 Author Posted April 24, 2013 I think you're right - I shouldn't be having my head turned by some other woman - the timing is terrible. We were getting on so well, and I had no intention of meeting some other woman and basically going on a date. I feel terrible.
PogoStick Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 You're not going to realistically have a relationship with the French girl right? Only keep her as a friend if you can maintain your boundaries. The same goes for your girlfriend. Can you maintain your boundaries?
Author markus36 Posted April 24, 2013 Author Posted April 24, 2013 I guess the French woman is a fantasy - met in a foreign city - had the perfect evening, and is probably about as beautiful as it gets. We had one evening together - but my point is if I felt the way I should about my girlfriend, I wouldn't be having these strange feelings for this other woman. The frenchwoman messaged me, sounds really keen to see me again, but I know it's a fantasy. Two months in with my girlfriend, I should be blind to other women, shouldn't I? I understand it's quite common to have crushes when you've been married 10 years, and so you wouldn't throw away a marriage for a crush in a foreign city, but what about two months - is it fair on my girlfriend?
AMusing Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 Your poor girlfriend. I doubt you'll find a woman on here who won't advocate you breaking up with her (for her sake), or at least coming clean with her. You didn't basically go on a date with another woman, you DID go on a date. You get kudos for not being a total jerk (i.e. not sleeping with the French woman, and at least acknowledging you aren't being fair to your girlfriend). But then you proceeded to keep in contact with the French woman? Come on, you seem like a smarter guy than that. The most moral thing to do would be to break up with your girlfriend before she becomes more invested in you and you break her heart, then you can decide what to do about the other woman. The second most moral thing would be to admit to the French woman you have a girlfriend, cease all contact with her, and then focus your attention on your current relationship. I think you know this though.
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