poisonwine Posted April 23, 2013 Posted April 23, 2013 it's been 3 months since we broke up and he's been taking his Thursday to spend time with me to start reconciliation. We dated for 2 years, I really feel like he's making the effort and I want us to get back together soon but, he's told me that he rather wait until the summer when he finishes classes. It's really hard to wait. Advice? Any positive wisdom?
Treasa Posted April 23, 2013 Posted April 23, 2013 Summer is in less than two months. Would you rather not be with him at all?
thefooloftheyear Posted April 23, 2013 Posted April 23, 2013 it's been 3 months since we broke up and he's been taking his Thursday to spend time with me to start reconciliation. We dated for 2 years, I really feel like he's making the effort and I want us to get back together soon but, he's told me that he rather wait until the summer when he finishes classes. It's really hard to wait. Advice? Any positive wisdom? I dont get it...Why wait for summer? I thought women found it unattractive for a man to be indecisive? TFY
LoveB86 Posted April 23, 2013 Posted April 23, 2013 it's been 3 months since we broke up and he's been taking his Thursday to spend time with me to start reconciliation. We dated for 2 years, I really feel like he's making the effort and I want us to get back together soon but, he's told me that he rather wait until the summer when he finishes classes. It's really hard to wait. Advice? Any positive wisdom? So when school starts back in the fall, he will possibly back out again? Sounds like someone is unsure. I would let him be and let it go. He doesn't sound stable imo.
LovesHangover Posted April 25, 2013 Posted April 25, 2013 You broke up but are now working on reconciliation, so taking your time is prudent. You have the opportunity to assess yourself and your previous relationship (the good, the bad, and the ugly) and what led to your breakup. It is important that you each fully understand what happened and why it happened. You both can use this as an opportunity to learn about yourself and from your mistakes with each other. After which, you get to create a new relationship. One where you're completely honest with each other expressing what you want and what you plan to do this time around to build a strong relationship and make it work. Set up agreements. Make plans. Enjoy each other's company. What's great about this is you have a better idea about what you're getting into before you begin again. You can have fun with creating something new. You already feel like he's making the effort, so what's the rush? Are Thursdays is just for sex or are you actually working on your relationship? You really need to communicate with him to fully understand how he feels and why he wants to wait. It could be any number of things (1. He wants to focus on finishing the semester so he'll be less stressed and can focus on your relationship, 2. He is apprehensive because you broke up before and is testing the waters, 3. He's trying to figure somethings out, or 4. Fill in the blanks etc., etc., etc.), but you'll never know unless you ask him. No one else can speak for him. Furthermore, just as you would want him to respect you and your wishes, you need to respect him and his. You should express how you feel about the situation as well as do what is best for you. For example, you can say, " Honey, I love you and I really want to understand why you want to wait?" or "I know I want to be with you and I'm ready right now to move forward together, so I want to know why you're holding back." You can't and shouldn't try to force him back into a relationship before he's ready. If you understand his reasons, you'll know why waiting is important to him. You also have to do what will be best for you in this situation. Only you know what is truly best for you. Learn to trust your gut. Say what you have to say, so that he has the opportunity to respect you and your wishes as well. In other words, you have to put your cards on the table as he has put his. I wish you the best of everything! Hope this helps. All the best, LovesHangover
Recommended Posts