mortensorchid Posted April 23, 2013 Posted April 23, 2013 Back in Jan/Feb, I connected with this guy through Facebook through some banter and eventually an IM chat. We had arranged to meet at some point, then he sent a text message on the day we were supposed to get together and said he could not make it because he had to work that day. I said I understood, work is work. He texted back "Thanks, glad you're not angry about it." I was expecting him to contact again and take a rain check for another day/time, but that contact did not come. I moved on. Then one day about a month ago, he emailed me through Facebook asking if I wanted to get together for this thing in another city. I said thank you but no, because I would not feel all that comfortable traveling to another city with a person I do not know. He said "Ok, it was a long shot, but I thought I would throw it out there." After that, nothing. Just today I got a text message from him saying he had just gotten a new job and soon he would be able to take me out for a real date soon. I don't get this. By his 3rd attempt he thinks that I am going to meet him? I have not responded to the text, I doubt very much I will, but if he asks again what do I say if anything except "I figured you had just moved onto something else"?
FlyerFan54 Posted April 23, 2013 Posted April 23, 2013 That is rather odd. Seems to me that he's trying to get some tail. If he was interested in meeting you, he would have arranged another meeting after the first attempt. The second attempt is a major red flag. You normally don't ask people to travel to another city when you haven't met them. I'd be weirded out by that. Do as you did the first time. Move on. At least respond by saying you appreciate it but are not interested. If he were interested enough, he would have found a way to either make it the first time, or work something out. That's just my opinion anyway.
Author mortensorchid Posted April 23, 2013 Author Posted April 23, 2013 I agree, Jack Sparrow. Just for the heck of it, I looked at some of his other Facebook posts of the recent past and he had been lamenting that he was longing for some girl here or there. I have no idea who he is talking about, and I thought the text itself was odd all these months later that he would send one. Still, for some hope springs eternal. I somewhat understand his motivations, but it would be best for me not to respond to it. Chances are he will blow me off again, and even if I did actually meet him face to face he would blow me off after the meeting.
mtber75 Posted April 23, 2013 Posted April 23, 2013 He's probably very shy and try to be all cool with his long shot LOL! The man been thinking of you for all this time that's why he keeps trying. If your not interest, just give him a firm reply back saying your not interested as a courtesy.
whatsdone Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 He's probably very shy and try to be all cool with his long shot LOL! The man been thinking of you for all this time that's why he keeps trying. If your not interest, just give him a firm reply back saying your not interested as a courtesy. I was thinking this at first...that he could possibly have reservations about meeting you because he is shy. However he did not make a prompt effort to ask you out after he flaked on the first one has me thinking he may not be interested. Also his second attempt at asking you out...he already knew that it was a long shot and was already probably expecting you to turn it down. Its his way of showing effort but still not following through because he knew it was a high no-go. He might just be the type of person that wants the attention really. Giving you crumbs here and there but just wants to know that you are interested but plans on not doing anything with it.
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 24, 2013 Posted April 24, 2013 It's simple. If he asks you out on a proper date one of these days, all you need to do is decide whether you feel like going, or you do not. So far, it hasn't happened. Why are you spending any time on it at this point? 1
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