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How Much Does Dating Affect Your Life?

MrCastle

By MrCastle
in Dating

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MrCastle Established Member

MrCastle

Posted
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I realize this is a dating forum, and we all have our reasons for signing up, but in real life, I don't give this stuff much thought, at all.

 

Sure, when I have highs, I'm in a better mood, and when I have lows, I'm bummed out, but overall I don't think about dating all that much in my day to day life. Only when I come on here to answer threads.

 

I'm more preoccupied with my art, and hanging out with friends, catching movies, overall just living life. Dating happens when it happens. I don't really stress women.

 

I guess what I'm asking is, how big of a role does dating play in your life? Is it all you think about? Does it consume you?

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BluEyeL Established Member

BluEyeL

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It did affect my life quite a bit, that's why I closed my online profile. It still affects it in the aftermath, but less.

fortyninethousand322 Established Member

fortyninethousand322

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I guess what I'm asking is, how big of a role does dating play in your life? Is it all you think about? Does it consume you?

 

Depends. I can keep myself busy by writing, watching sports, playing sports, watching movies, working out, etc.

 

But, the moment I start thinking about it (either randomly or I happen to see some girl somewhere or I happen to read something online) I tend to get obsessed and consumed by it.

 

It's feast or famine I think with me.

TheZebra Established Member

TheZebra

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I think coming on here and reading some of these threads affects me more than any man out there right now lol. So many clueless people... so little time.

 

But yeah, I'm not focusing on dating right now. If I meet a datable guy doing what I'm doing then that's great, if not, there's always porn :lmao:. I find that if you don't invest too much into it you don't get unnecessarily attached in the beginning, since you're not spending hours upon hours thinking about it.

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Treasa Established Member

Treasa

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I absolutely don't want a boyfriend or anything more. I don't really think about dating. I come here to talk to people I like and hopefully share the occasional bits of wisdom that stray into my mind.

 

I'm far too focused on things I'd like to do to make my life better. I don't really have enough time for a boyfriend anyway.

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ltjg45 Established Member

ltjg45

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The last thing on my mind is trying to date.

 

Even if I do try, I don't see me succeeding so why bother?

 

I got bigger issues to worry about like finding a job and losing this belly.

Eternal Sunshine Established Member

Eternal Sunshine

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I only think about it when there are some good options or I am dating someone.

 

Otherwise, no, I come on LS out of habit mostly :D

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Jane2011 Established Member

Jane2011

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I'd say it consumes me a lot when I'm single. But in recent years I've been able to both be single / obsess about being single AND be productive with work, hobbies, etc. Last year around this time I was single and doing a lot of academic work.

 

I'm not happy single, in general. But at the same time, I remain picky and won't go out with just anyone and am "able to be alone." I just stay alone and grumble about it :p

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Imajerk17 Established Member

Imajerk17

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I have a full life that I love.

 

My "charge" for 2013 if you will, is to learn to love myself more. I just get way too down on myself when I screw up and I put others opinions of me (due to that one interaction) before my own. I admit that this is something I truly need to get better at.

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Star Gazer Established Member

Star Gazer

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Dating, or really, finding time to date, pretty much takes over all of what little free time I have. If there's anything that consumes me, it's balancing it in my schedule. It's hard!

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Eggplant Established Member

Eggplant

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Falling in love drove me insane. I couldn't concentrate, eat, nor sleep. I couldn't stop laughing. I was truly crazy, truly high. So much adrenaline. Always an ultra-cautious person, I had no fear. I could have walked in front of an oncoming train. Thrown away my whole life. Easily. It's only happened once, however. Otherwise, I'm fairly low-key.

married2school Established Member

married2school

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Outside of school and hobbies, I don't have a whole lot of time to date. I originally joined here yesterday after this came up on Google when I didn't trust some advice my best friend was giving me. :laugh: Decided what the heck. Otherwise though, I've mainly used OLD in the past year to make new friends since I moved. If it leads to something great, if it doesn't, no big deal.

Star Gazer Established Member

Star Gazer

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It consumes much, much less of my life than it used to. And it's become much, much more enjoyable and just EASIER as a result.

 

I've preferred my own company over that of anyone else these past months since I spend so much time alone. I have to be very intrigued by a man to have him take up a decent share of my time.

 

Like 13 hours on the phone? ;)

 

I think it affects your life more than you're letting on... :p

carhill Established Member

carhill

Posted
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I guess what I'm asking is, how big of a role does dating play in your life? Is it all you think about? Does it consume you?

 

To the extent that I dated after my exW and I split up, it was a small part of an otherwise involved life. If I got or get 'excited' or 'consumed', it's with the friends who stuck with me through thick and thin and with whom I have loving and satisfying relationships. Dating was merely 'getting to know' a potential new person. Nothing more, nothing less. I suspect it will remain that way for a long time to come.

Star Gazer Established Member

Star Gazer

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:p Sure, that was a good bit of time. But I don't obsess over dating like I used to, and therefore it doesn't impact other, more important aspects of my life. I can sleep through the night (when I'm not choosing to stay up :laugh:), my work isn't affected, etc. I've learned to compartmentalize.

 

It's kinda cool to have witnessed so many (myself included) make these improvements. :)

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Eternal Sunshine Established Member

Eternal Sunshine

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:p Sure, that was a good bit of time. But I don't obsess over dating like I used to, and therefore it doesn't impact other, more important aspects of my life. I can sleep through the night (when I'm not choosing to stay up :laugh:), my work isn't affected, etc. I've learned to compartmentalize.

 

I used to obsess when a guy doesn't respond to my text for 5 minutes :laugh:

 

I feel like a completely different person now.

  • Like 4
HoneyBadgerDontCare Established Member

HoneyBadgerDontCare

Posted
Posted
I realize this is a dating forum, and we all have our reasons for signing up, but in real life, I don't give this stuff much thought, at all.

 

Sure, when I have highs, I'm in a better mood, and when I have lows, I'm bummed out, but overall I don't think about dating all that much in my day to day life. Only when I come on here to answer threads.

 

I'm more preoccupied with my art, and hanging out with friends, catching movies, overall just living life. Dating happens when it happens. I don't really stress women.

 

I guess what I'm asking is, how big of a role does dating play in your life? Is it all you think about? Does it consume you?

 

I think about it pretty often. I would say my thoughts vary between 4 things: dating, my job, my business, and having as much fun as possible. So it's probably ~25% of my thoughts.

 

Unfortunately, my current mentor is a VERY hot girl. So it might be a bit more than that now. :p

candie13 Established Member

candie13

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I spent the last two years allowing it to drive me crazy. I was very hung up on finding a guy to meet my emotional needs, because it was easier to do that, than to confront my fears by myself.

 

So, as it quite often happens, I've hit a new low which allowed me to get in contact with myself. After that, I couldn't really be less interested in dating... and it's at that moment that I met the most interesting men :). I am dating one of them right now.

 

Does it still not take a toll on my life? For sure. I am sh*t scared. But, I am working on myself every day. I feel another break through coming up next. Maybe I'll just get myself free from the man I am seeing now and go celibate for a year or two. Dunno. But something is up, that is for sure. And it's not about the men, about dating or about anything outside me. I'm finally dealing with myself. Hard work. But I gotta sort my sh*t out, it's taken me 32 years already, I guess I am a bit late, haha!

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jma500 Established Member

jma500

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I don't let it consume me. Would i like a girlfriend, kids, and a wife? Most definately! Will it happen? Unknown. The only thing that consumes me is photographic arts.

somedude81 Established Member

somedude81

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My complete and utter lack of any dating life has absolutely destroyed my confidence and self-esteem while also causing me to go into a long term depression.

 

It affects everything I do. Everything from struggling to get enough motivation to study and focus on homework to not even wanting to get out of bed.

 

I'm constantly thinking about which girl I want to ask out next, how it's going to suck to get rejected by her and having to find another girl to get rejected by.

 

Yeah I say that "dating" consumes me. That probably won't change till I stop being lonely.

sweetkiwi Established Member

sweetkiwi

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I suppose dating has always been a part of my life. Sometimes it seems forced. Those are times I overanalyze. The natural fun times are more common however.

 

I've come a long way in the past few years. Letting go of the past. Forgiving others and myself. Truly loving myself and not settling for things. Its led me to my current relationship. One I never expected but I can't remember why I put up with men who didn't treat me so tenderly.

  • Like 1
mesmerized Established Member

mesmerized

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Sometimes it affects me a lot, sometimes I just don't think about it. Recently I find that it has been on my mind a lot. But yeah, coming to this place often does not help lol

  • Like 1
curlygirl40 Established Member

curlygirl40

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If I had to put a number on it.... I would say 10% of my time.

 

Between monitoring OLD profiles, returning e-mails, flirting with guys via text, actual dates, reading and posting on LS and working out at the gym so I look good naked, 10% of my time. :-)

 

But what goes on during that 10% of my time does not affect the other 90% of my life as far as my moods, etc.

pbjbear Established Member

pbjbear

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It comes and goes. But I know that it's not to be. I can't connect on the emotional level. That part of me died a while ago.

 

Can I ask how it died?

tuxedo cat Established Member

tuxedo cat

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When I'm dating someone I really like it kind of consumes me. That's how I've always been.

 

When I'm single I almost never think about guys.

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