toc200 Posted April 19, 2013 Posted April 19, 2013 So as some may know. I am 2 months into BU, and I've been having some rough times. I live in a small town where I was always bumping into ex gf. We hung out a couple times; trying to keep things amicable. She sent some very lovey dovey texts one night. But apologized in the morning for being too loverish. She left to her home city this weekend and it hit me like a train because I might not ever see her again. This really hurts. Well I have some friends from home coming here and I've recently broken a bone by accident, making work fairly difficult. I could probably make ends meet here but I have no family or close friends here to help me get over her and a false hope that she'll ask us to try again. So I have the opportunity possibly to leave soon with my friends to my hometown. I don't want to feel like I'm running from my problems. I don't want to feel like she's tAking this amazing place from me. But I feel that separating myself from these triggers and being home with family and friends may help me heal. What are your thoughts guys? Am I just running? Shouldn't I be further than this 2 months post BU? We dated for almost 2.5 years BTW, living together for 2.
crustyjojo Posted April 19, 2013 Posted April 19, 2013 Hi - I do not live in my home country and my mum flew out to me after breakup as I was such a mess. She tried to persuade me to go back with her, but I did not want to. Partly, as I felt I had to face and deal with the situation but also as I did not want to feel that I was running away. 5 weeks post BU and into 4th week of NC, I was not coping well or healing. I have decided to go back for a vacation to get away from everything to help me heal. To be with familiar people, to feel safe, and to be able to do things I cant do easily here - like hit the shops. I have to say, since the flight was booked I feel lifted as I have something to look forward to. So in answer to your question, dont feel like you are running away. See it as a step in the right direction to healing
head/heels Posted April 20, 2013 Posted April 20, 2013 Not running, just moving to a place where you will have more support, smiles, helpful advice and will aide you in getting over her and the situation much much faster. GL
LumberJack Posted April 25, 2013 Posted April 25, 2013 It really helps - physically distancing yourself from what's happened. Breakups are traumatic and they bring about a change in your life, even if you choose to keep going like nothing happened. Changing cities might be drastic, especially if you have one of them careers, but you can at least move into a new apartment. For me it made a huge difference. Be strong man & good luck!
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