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Always listen to your gut


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Posted

I posted a short bit ago about my reservations about dating someone who was moving at lightening speed, and had also seriously dated a stripper in the past.

 

Ninjainpajamas was actually pretty spot on when he guessed that it wasn't my only reservation about him. There were other red flags, such as his lack of a relationship with his family, the way he spoke about his mother, getting dismissed from his PhD program because he "doesn't handle criticism well", and other things he would say that would catch me off guard and leave me scratching my head.

 

Well, I broke up with him when I just couldn't see things progressing any further and all of these things combined became too much to ignore. He had actually purchased an engagement ring after only dating me a few months. I couldn't wrap my mind around it. He would also make snide remarks about the fact that I drive a luxury vehicle and went to a breeder instead of the pound when I got my beloved golden.

 

To say he fell went off the deep end is an understatement. I was called every nasty name in the book. He became verbally abusive. He said that I was "selfish" for "eating his food and drinking his wine" when I stayed at his house. He sent a string of emails one right after the other, saying he loved me in one, and that I was a nasty cunt in the next. He even accused me of stealing his shampoo. :lmao: I can't make this sh*t up.

 

From now on - I'm never second-guessing myself again. I just KNEW there was something off about him but I thought I was being silly and just looking for reasons not to like him.

 

Always listen to your gut.

  • Like 6
Posted

Yikes. Good thing you got out when you did.

Posted
I posted a short bit ago about my reservations about dating someone who was moving at lightening speed, and had also seriously dated a stripper in the past.

 

Ninjainpajamas was actually pretty spot on when he guessed that it wasn't my only reservation about him. There were other red flags, such as his lack of a relationship with his family, the way he spoke about his mother, getting dismissed from his PhD program because he "doesn't handle criticism well", and other things he would say that would catch me off guard and leave me scratching my head.

 

Well, I broke up with him when I just couldn't see things progressing any further and all of these things combined became too much to ignore. He had actually purchased an engagement ring after only dating me a few months. I couldn't wrap my mind around it. He would also make snide remarks about the fact that I drive a luxury vehicle and went to a breeder instead of the pound when I got my beloved golden.

 

To say he fell went off the deep end is an understatement. I was called every nasty name in the book. He became verbally abusive. He said that I was "selfish" for "eating his food and drinking his wine" when I stayed at his house. He sent a string of emails one right after the other, saying he loved me in one, and that I was a nasty cunt in the next. He even accused me of stealing his shampoo. :lmao: I can't make this sh*t up.

 

From now on - I'm never second-guessing myself again. I just KNEW there was something off about him but I thought I was being silly and just looking for reasons not to like him.

 

Always listen to your gut.

 

:eek: Whaaaaaat.

 

If I had known about the other things, I would have told you hell not to the previously dating a stripper thing.

 

He reminds me of the douchebag I used to date last year.

 

His loss, and I'm glad you left!

Posted (edited)
I posted a short bit ago about my reservations about dating someone who was moving at lightening speed, and had also seriously dated a stripper in the past.

 

Ninjainpajamas was actually pretty spot on when he guessed that it wasn't my only reservation about him. There were other red flags, such as his lack of a relationship with his family, the way he spoke about his mother, getting dismissed from his PhD program because he "doesn't handle criticism well", and other things he would say that would catch me off guard and leave me scratching my head.

 

Well, I broke up with him when I just couldn't see things progressing any further and all of these things combined became too much to ignore. He had actually purchased an engagement ring after only dating me a few months. I couldn't wrap my mind around it. He would also make snide remarks about the fact that I drive a luxury vehicle and went to a breeder instead of the pound when I got my beloved golden.

 

To say he fell went off the deep end is an understatement. I was called every nasty name in the book. He became verbally abusive. He said that I was "selfish" for "eating his food and drinking his wine" when I stayed at his house. He sent a string of emails one right after the other, saying he loved me in one, and that I was a nasty cunt in the next. He even accused me of stealing his shampoo. :lmao: I can't make this sh*t up.

 

From now on - I'm never second-guessing myself again. I just KNEW there was something off about him but I thought I was being silly and just looking for reasons not to like him.

 

Always listen to your gut.

 

I am glad you got out of this situation drseussgrrl, and I salute you for doing it quickly.

 

I am a bit confused though. Is this the guy you met out with friends a few months ago? Good-looking and smooth but a very caring devoted dad. He sounded like a great guy (which is why I stood up for him in your last thread)....

Edited by Imajerk17
  • Author
Posted
I am glad you got out of this situation drseussgrrl, and I salute you for doing it quickly.

 

I am a bit confused though. Is this the guy you met out with friends a few months ago? Good-looking and smooth but a very caring devoted dad. He sounded like a great guy (which is why I stood up for him in your last thread)....

 

No - I liked him but there was no chemistry. We only went out twice. Super sweet dude though. But, I highly suspected he might be gay. LOL

Posted
I am glad you got out of this situation drseussgrrl, and I salute you for doing it quickly.

 

I am a bit confused though. Is this the guy you met out with friends a few months ago? Good-looking and smooth but a very caring devoted dad. He sounded like a great guy (which is why I stood up for him in your last thread)....

 

Yeah, is this the same dude who was the doctor and wanted to take you on a trip?

  • Author
Posted
Yeah, is this the same dude who was the doctor and wanted to take you on a trip?

 

Nope. I only went out with each of those dudes a few times, and inevitably they fizzled.

 

The dad, I'm pretty sure, is gay. :p

  • Like 1
Posted
Yeah, is this the same dude who was the doctor and wanted to take you on a trip?

 

I'm actually remembering a guy after that Treasa. She met the doctor (who wanted to take her on that trip) online I believe, while she met the dude I was referring to when she was out with her friends like a month after she met the doctor.

 

I got the feeling that her chemistry with the doctor was sort of lacking and she was talking herself into giving the guy a chance, while her chemistry with the dude she met out with her friends was instantaneous.

  • Like 1
Posted
Nope. I only went out with each of those dudes a few times, and inevitably they fizzled.

 

The dad, I'm pretty sure, is gay. :p

 

OK. (Wrote my last post before I saw this one...)

Posted

I'm surprised he didn't dump you for stealing his shampoo! JUST kidding:)

 

Snide remarks are a huge red flag IMO. I had a thread here about that and some agreed with me and some thought I blew it out of proportion. TBS his remarks seem worse. I'm glad you had the strength to walk away!

  • Like 1
Posted
I'm actually remembering a guy after that Treasa. She met the doctor (who wanted to take her on that trip) online I believe, while she met the dude I was referring to when she was out with her friends like a month after she met the doctor.

 

I got the feeling that her chemistry with the doctor was sort of lacking and she was talking herself into giving the guy a chance, while her chemistry with the dude she met out with her friends was instantaneous.

 

At least she's never lacking guys wanting to be with her. :laugh:

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
At least she's never lacking guys wanting to be with her. :laugh:

 

Ha. Thanks girl. But at this point I'd go for quality over quantity. WHERE THE EFF IS HE?! :laugh:

  • Like 1
Posted
Ha. Thanks girl. But at this point I'd go for quality over quantity. WHERE THE EFF IS HE?! :laugh:

 

**** Where's Waldo. Where's Mr. Awesome?

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Posted
Right here...except for the obvious hurdle of me becoming phobic of relationships.

 

Ha. Details, details.

Posted
Ha. Details, details.

He has his own telenovela-thread. Stay away from him, he's bad news LOL

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Posted
He has his own telenovela-thread. Stay away from him, he's bad news LOL

 

Oh yeah! I've been following. I check for updates more than I check my FB feed at this point. LOL

  • Like 1
Posted

When it comes to gut, I'm a huge proponent. My theory is that it's a manifestation of the unconscious mind, where the unconscious mind processes at lightening speed, notices patterns and anomalies, sifting through copious amounts of information that the conscious mind skips or ignores for variable reasons of which emotional/hormonal responses play a huge factor.

 

It's part of our "reptilian" brain where any lag in response might have meant death, during our ancestral times.

  • Like 4
  • Author
Posted
women have weak guts. a man wouldve known in an hour. it took you months.

 

To be fair - I have been known to pass on guys for much less. I figured I would give this an honest shot, thinking perhaps I was too picky and judgmental, and maybe commitment-phobic.

 

It turns out I'm not. And please with the whole, a "man" would have known. I have guy friends who are caught up with some real pieces of work who aren't going anywhere.

 

I made a clean break, and THAT was when the verbal attacks started. I should have trusted my gut.

Posted
women have weak guts. a man wouldve known in an hour. it took you months.
Considering how testosterone is an empathy suppressant, science doesn't support your presumption unless you have unusually high levels of estrogen.
  • Like 3
Posted
Considering how testosterone is an empathy suppressant, science doesn't support your presumption unless you have unusually high levels of estrogen.

 

I love you.

  • Like 1
Posted
considering i'm in the real world and not a science lab. lol.
Or maybe high levels of estrogen and/or low levels of testosterone? Either could account for having high empathy, sufficient to judge another within hours.

 

The other possibility is projection, where the subjective observer's inner world is projected onto others. "If I'm capable of X, for certain Y is capable of X".

Posted
again, its the real world and not a science lab. men have common sense thus they can judge within hours. women buy men's whacked sales pitches because they can't get over the way he talks to her or his nice eyes. men don't fall for that.
Considering how men are more visual, as proven through many studies of which some include fMRI imaging of sexual arousal patterns, once again you don't align with the majority of men. That's not common sense. That's called fantasy.
Posted
chemistry major? you should date within your major. have at it with chemitry, math, computers, fancy schmancy digital imaging. at the same time i'll be using street smarts, while you spend months on book smarts. street smarts win.
Have you ever dated men?
Posted
as i said, you've been a chemistry lab too long. no wonder when a women takes four full months to figure out a man's a creep its a major accomplishment. i don't agree with homosexuality if that's what you want to know, though to quiet down their agenda i'd give them domestic partnerships.
Once again, have you ever dated men?
Posted
for all your love of science and logic. i don't agree with homosexuality but you keep asking if i'm a homosexual. this is why men can figure it out in hours when women take months. its a lack of seeing what's under your nose.
So you're a man who has never dated men, who presumes to know what it's like dating men, regardless of individuality of men. Got it. Carry on. ;)
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