jusjus Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Ok, Ihave been dating this girl for 4 months now. Right from the outset she stated she wasn`t looking for a relationship as she wants to be able to enjoy herself and not be tied down. I accepted this but 3 months later I started falling for her (strange because I wasn`t that into her at the beginning) and brought up the idea of being together. She got all embarrassed and said nothing (many would say `there`s your answer`) so I asked her to think about it . A few days later I asked her if she would kindly give a response and again she said "I`m not looking for a relationship - lets just carry on as we are " Then for some stupid reason I started asking if she was seeing other guys or if she wanted to see other guys to which she replied "no". So, she wants to be together just not with a label. She is not very forthcoming on physical intimacy either we have hardly kissed and everytime I try, she reluctantly makes it last a second or two. Where do I stand????
TaraMaiden Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Ok, Ihave been dating this girl for 4 months now. Right from the outset she stated she wasn`t looking for a relationship as she wants to be able to enjoy herself and not be tied down. I accepted this but 3 months later I started falling for her (strange because I wasn`t that into her at the beginning) and brought up the idea of being together. She got all embarrassed and said nothing (many would say `there`s your answer`) so I asked her to think about it . A few days later I asked her if she would kindly give a response and again she said "I`m not looking for a relationship - lets just carry on as we are " Then for some stupid reason I started asking if she was seeing other guys or if she wanted to see other guys to which she replied "no". So, she wants to be together just not with a label. She is not very forthcoming on physical intimacy either we have hardly kissed and everytime I try, she reluctantly makes it last a second or two. Where do I stand???? `there`s your answer`
kassy Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Reframing the same problem is not going to result in different responses. I would find it difficult to say you have been dating her. To be honest it sounds like she sees you more like a puppy to string along. You are getting NOTHING from this. MOVE ON. She doesn't even want to kiss you. Kissing on the cheek doesn't count after about 14. Ok younger. Why are you persisting with this? Have you had a proper girlfriend before who you were physically intimate? Are you particularly religious? I'm not trying to be mean just trying really hard to understand where you are coming from. Do you struggle with dating?
Archgirl Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Ok, Ihave been dating this girl for 4 months now. Right from the outset she stated she wasn`t looking for a relationship as she wants to be able to enjoy herself and not be tied down. I accepted this but 3 months later I started falling for her (strange because I wasn`t that into her at the beginning) and brought up the idea of being together. She got all embarrassed and said nothing (many would say `there`s your answer`) so I asked her to think about it . A few days later I asked her if she would kindly give a response and again she said "I`m not looking for a relationship - lets just carry on as we are " Then for some stupid reason I started asking if she was seeing other guys or if she wanted to see other guys to which she replied "no". So, she wants to be together just not with a label. She is not very forthcoming on physical intimacy either we have hardly kissed and everytime I try, she reluctantly makes it last a second or two. Where do I stand???? It sounds like she just wants you for the companionship and isn't very attracted to you. You can accept this role but it's not going to result in a relationship, we don't pick men just because they are persistent, like it's not the last one standing we marry. I'd recommend trying to talk about the lack of intimacy and what she wants out of your association instead of focusing on you want. Be prepared for not hearing what you want to hear though.
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