Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 I met this girl in chat room on Omegle and we exchanged Email and added each other on Facebook. We seem like we share some common interest and she said she is coming to the US in 2 years by then she would have enough money to leave Poland, she is planning to go to college here in the US. Since I never been on a date with anyone before this might be my opportunity to be with someone despite I would have to wait 2 years before she can come here. Have anyone try to build a relationship with someone that is outside the United States? Some of you ay say how come your not meeting women local to you? My reason is straight forward, American girls never seem interested in me. I get a few that look at me but they don't say nothing, like or how you doing anything. It's hard to meet girls at school because I'm taking 4 courses with the same group of people so I don't have much opportunity people who are single. Plus you need to have a car, house and good money. From what I read online European girls don't really care about those things. Most of this stuff I read from online and the way things are for me, I beginning to believe those blogs. No wonder why I never dated and never been in a relationship.
outsidethebox Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 I think it's safe to say it's not that they don't care, but getting citizenship in US (or maybe western Europe or Australia) is part of achieving that. And getting citizenship is marrying someone here. I am an admirer of those women, especially Ukranian, and not dissing it. We all have an interest in a better life if possible.
Ninjainpajamas Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 I've dated women from very different cultures, as well as European women and had a long-term relationships as well. The first thing you need to realize is there is always a difference in culture, although you may relate on a lot of levels, you have been brought up in entirely different countries and parts of the world. So there is more to learn than just the personality when it comes to understanding the person, values may be different or viewed differently and there may be some conflict in that...you may share different opinions on real life stuff, you also have to take into consideration religious influence if either of you are religious. I'm not familiar with Poland, other than Germany and Russia gang-banged it from the back and the front at the start of WW2. So I think it would be interesting for you to do a little research into that and even listen to the language, browse some videos on youtube or something, interact with that community...just for fun and to feed your adventurous spirit. And then work your butt off if you'd like do a little run away meet in Poland with your potential lover, there's nothing keeping you from visiting the country...albeit expensive and you'll need some money saved up to do that...but if you really want to get it done, maybe you could make it happen before hand? But look, you're not even at that point yet. I'm merely entertaining the idea for you to open up your perspective on this, and give you something to invest your energy in before you start planning on a 2 year wait and developing further into this potential romance. Two years is a long time, and it can be done but sometimes getting your feet wet will tell you how much you realistically want to do this. Sure you can just wait for her to come down for college, she may or may not even be able to get into school where you are at, there may be some other complications as well. And also realize that you might not even connect the same way physically once you are in person, It's different learning about someone over the internet and then meeting them in real life and having it come into practice, there's a difference in body-language and behavior that doesn't come through online. Chemistry is a factor as well. However I will say personally If I've connected with someone online then I am likely to connect with them in real life the same way, but that's just my personal experience, I've heard it go down differently for others. The values can be very different in terms of the typical American woman...yes they can be less materialistic, less vain, less about "image", but it's all subjective too...you have to pay attention the culture of that country to get a better idea, it doesn't mean they won't have any expectations from you as a man. European women tend to be independent as well, they might drink and smoke from a young age as it's not as taboo, and that can cross over to sex or how they get into relationships in their culture...these things can affect compatibility, however honestly, they are not deal-breakers for many or even possibly preferred, just something to keep in mind. IMO you need more life experience and relationship experience, I'm giving you an overkill of information because I doubt you've considered all of these things. If you think it's going to be easier to be in a relationship, your first relationship because maybe girls from your own culture aren't compatible with you and things would work better from someone who is maybe from somewhere else and is, and maybe that's the problem...you've got another thing coming to you.
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 I've dated women from very different cultures, as well as European women and had a long-term relationships as well. The first thing you need to realize is there is always a difference in culture, although you may relate on a lot of levels, you have been brought up in entirely different countries and parts of the world. So there is more to learn than just the personality when it comes to understanding the person, values may be different or viewed differently and there may be some conflict in that...you may share different opinions on real life stuff, you also have to take into consideration religious influence if either of you are religious. I'm not familiar with Poland, other than Germany and Russia gang-banged it from the back and the front at the start of WW2. So I think it would be interesting for you to do a little research into that and even listen to the language, browse some videos on youtube or something, interact with that community...just for fun and to feed your adventurous spirit. And then work your butt off if you'd like do a little run away meet in Poland with your potential lover, there's nothing keeping you from visiting the country...albeit expensive and you'll need some money saved up to do that...but if you really want to get it done, maybe you could make it happen before hand? But look, you're not even at that point yet. I'm merely entertaining the idea for you to open up your perspective on this, and give you something to invest your energy in before you start planning on a 2 year wait and developing further into this potential romance. Two years is a long time, and it can be done but sometimes getting your feet wet will tell you how much you realistically want to do this. Sure you can just wait for her to come down for college, she may or may not even be able to get into school where you are at, there may be some other complications as well. And also realize that you might not even connect the same way physically once you are in person, It's different learning about someone over the internet and then meeting them in real life and having it come into practice, there's a difference in body-language and behavior that doesn't come through online. Chemistry is a factor as well. However I will say personally If I've connected with someone online then I am likely to connect with them in real life the same way, but that's just my personal experience, I've heard it go down differently for others. The values can be very different in terms of the typical American woman...yes they can be less materialistic, less vain, less about "image", but it's all subjective too...you have to pay attention the culture of that country to get a better idea, it doesn't mean they won't have any expectations from you as a man. European women tend to be independent as well, they might drink and smoke from a young age as it's not as taboo, and that can cross over to sex or how they get into relationships in their culture...these things can affect compatibility, however honestly, they are not deal-breakers for many or even possibly preferred, just something to keep in mind. IMO you need more life experience and relationship experience, I'm giving you an overkill of information because I doubt you've considered all of these things. If you think it's going to be easier to be in a relationship, your first relationship because maybe girls from your own culture aren't compatible with you and things would work better from someone who is maybe from somewhere else and is, and maybe that's the problem...you've got another thing coming to you. Nope I never considered about none of things you mention, I would need to look in further. I read online about Russian culture so I'm a somewhat familiar with them. I wouldn't mind dating a Russian woman.
BluEyeL Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 I'm from Romania. The cultural differences are not that great, like between US and Asia for example, and those differences that exist are in general in the men's advantage. But there are all kinds of people everywhere, good and bad, and one cannot generalize about one person based solely on their culture, so it really depends on character. My greatest cultural problem is that Americans seem to all have dogs, and I don't give a hoot about football. Oh... and the church going is so widespread in the US compared to my home country. That about sums it up. 1
carhill Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Live a little. Poland is an interesting country and a stone's throw from a number of other countries with marked social, travel and cultural opportunities. The easiest way to gauge a lady's interest is to set up a meeting and visit. I've only been to Poland once, and just to catch a train to Lviv (Ukraine) from Warsaw. Wouldn't mind going back again. There's something about spring and miniskirts in Eastern Europe 2
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 I'm from Romania. The cultural differences are not that great, like between US and Asia for example, and those differences that exist are in general in the men's advantage. But there are all kinds of people everywhere, good and bad, and one cannot generalize about one person based solely on their culture, so it really depends on character. My greatest cultural problem is that Americans seem to all have dogs, and I don't give a hoot about football. Oh... and the church going is so widespread in the US compared to my home country. That about sums it up. LOL... I never met any Romanian people but I would like to. I'm a open person to all backgrounds. As far Poland go I will have to think about this as someone said 2 years of my life could be wasted.
BluEyeL Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 California is full of Romanians I've lived in Davis, CA, for 5 years. CA is the best state!
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 Nice.... I'm wondering if I'm getting too excited about this girl way in Poland.
FitChick Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Plenty of Poles in the US. Why some people think poor people in other countries are less materialistic than we are is beyond me. Why do you think they want to come here?
Ninjainpajamas Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Plenty of Poles in the US. Why some people think poor people in other countries are less materialistic than we are is beyond me. Why do you think they want to come here? They want to come here for the opportunities and to better their lives if they are from poor countries. Some also want to come here for the mystique and majesty of the world renowned United States, especially in California here in Los Angeles where every day weather is frustratingly dull and sunny, palm trees slap you in the face everywhere you go, and movie stars run the streets in abundance. You can spend hours just frolicking through the sandy beaches, kicking sand up in the air while laughing merrily like a kid with down-syndrome. And we won't mention the Mexicans that steam-power this factory of dreams, the endless traffic and half of your existence you may spend in it. So if you want the best mexican food, you're in the right place. Most people have an idealized and romanticized idea of traveling and the world and it's exacerbated for the US. When really, it's just everyday people living and working just like everywhere else. However I think it's important to travel, it opens your eyes and expands your mental horizons of society and people/human beings. I feel sad for those who have never experienced it. People are quite materialistic here when they are from poor countries. Immigrants or foreigners tend to work tirelessly to solidify a prosperous future, especially dem damn Asians, I swear if you took Asian's out of the university population in this country, enrollment would be cut in half, you damn people are motivated!..but they still can't speak English or drive, wtf!!? "Why did u cum for? you hit me w yo cah...you pay me now, you give me discount!" All you pacific islanders will just end up in nursing, let's face it. The Mexicans mainly participate in making babies, but they're the beating heart of California, no fruit, no vegetables, no fast food, restaurant staff, car wash, and we want to send them all back across the border? pfft! No American would do their job, they'd rather be behind a desk than the under the rays of the beating sun, especially the lazy mexican-americans! And don't get me started on them Persians/Armenians! More gold and cologne than you can shake a Kebab at! and when it comes to business "Gimme good price!, I have special price for you my friend...here's where I rip you off". And those Indians "Please come again.." If you look at Ghandi he was a straight computer nerd, so it's no surprise what profession his people chose. You'll either love or hate the curry, and you'll wish they took half of the cologne and body fragrance from the Armenians (they could definitely spare it). And the blacks...long, long, long lines out of Chicken N waffles...but it's damn good! don't knock it till you try it! Just don't go to cities named Compton or Inglewood after the street lights come on folks, especially if you're whiter than brand new bedsheets, you'll look like a star in the night sky down there and the black men here looooove white women! But you'll have some of the greasiest most butt-nasty fried chicken of your life, but it's good...just not for your heart, no salads or any of that. All in all, that's what makes Los Angeles, California truly "magical"....hell I should be a spokesperson!
rocketman122 Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 All I can say is Polish girls are SMOKING HOT!!! that white pale skin...ooowa! some pieces of azz. git yours man. good luck. Oh,btw take Bulln with you when you go
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 (edited) Plenty of Poles in the US. Why some people think poor people in other countries are less materialistic than we are is beyond me. Why do you think they want to come here? They typically don't worry as much as American women do I been told. I know this guy who is getting married to a Ukraine lady and got her a ring and said she had no problem with it. He said with his ex wife she was picky about the ring by the brand name. He said she said it was a cheap brand name. That is the kind of stuff that pushes me away from dating women here. Most women here want guys to have a nice car, home and lot of money. All of us are not bless being wealthy especially in this economy. This is the reason why I can never date anybody. Living at home and finishing up my last year of college makes it harder to find a date. So that is when its time to look outside the USA for people who are not highly materialistic. Both men and women are materialistic, we all want something, but we all cannot have it. I think this is where most Europeans differ at from what I heard and read. He said American women through marriage worry about your income while a typical Russian or Ukraine just don't want a drunk man that abuse her and not checking out other women. Relationship should be built off by income it should be about the love the person shows. That is why in the wedding vows, through rich or poor. Wedding vows these days don't mean s**t at least here in America. Edited April 18, 2013 by Locust
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 All I can say is Polish girls are SMOKING HOT!!! that white pale skin...ooowa! some pieces of azz. git yours man. good luck. Oh,btw take Bulln with you when you go LOL!!!!
rocketman122 Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 (edited) Plenty of Poles in the US. Why some people think poor people in other countries are less materialistic than we are is beyond me. Why do you think they want to come here? because women who come to the US get Americanized and many of them lose that special something they had when theyre there after some time. the innocent naivety they had is gone cause the women there are a bad influence on them. I saw that with my dads ex wife. she was russia. started mingling with american women and things went downhill and she became a bitch. and this: while its not true for many, it is true though. Im gonna be when im at! Edited April 18, 2013 by rocketman122
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 (edited) because women who come to the US get Americanized and many of them lose that special something they had when theyre there after some time. the innocent naivety they had is gone cause the women there are a bad influence on them. I saw that with my dads ex wife. she was russia. started mingling with american women and things went downhill and she became a bitch. and this: while its not true for many, it is true though. Im gonna be when im at! That is messed up. He should kept her in check. Edited April 18, 2013 by Locust
ExpatInItaly Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 Most of the responses here seem to focus only on cultural issues (and there are a LOT of stereotypes being thrown around here...shame). I know that your question was about culture...but really...you plan to wait two years for a girl you've never met? A lot can happen in that time. She could meet someone. You could meet someone. She might never come to the US. Those are all very likely possibilities. Please don't hold out too much hope for this; you're both young and should enjoy your lives in the moment. Young people dream big and often have no idea about the the steps and hard work required to make those dreams come true (ie relocating abroad) I'd say go right ahead and continue the friendship. But from a realistic standpoint, don't expect too much. You could wind up wasting your time and getting hurt
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 Most of the responses here seem to focus only on cultural issues (and there are a LOT of stereotypes being thrown around here...shame). I know that your question was about culture...but really...you plan to wait two years for a girl you've never met? A lot can happen in that time. She could meet someone. You could meet someone. She might never come to the US. Those are all very likely possibilities. Please don't hold out too much hope for this; you're both young and should enjoy your lives in the moment. Young people dream big and often have no idea about the the steps and hard work required to make those dreams come true (ie relocating abroad) I'd say go right ahead and continue the friendship. But from a realistic standpoint, don't expect too much. You could wind up wasting your time and getting hurt Yes you are correct 2 years is a long time to wait for someone. But at this time I'm currently a college student last year in school working part-time and I live at home without a vehicle. See the issues American women want men with high paying job, I working toward that but I don't have it yet. Waiting years to get high income just to date an American woman is the same waiting 2 years for the Polish girl to come. I feel that American women will not date me anyways because my current situation. If I was to date a European woman I won't have a problem because they are not as materialistic as American women are.
BluEyeL Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 I'm also concerned with the fact that you want to wait 2yrs just to meet this girl. She might move on in the meantime. I'd say it's not a good plan.
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 I'm also concerned with the fact that you want to wait 2yrs just to meet this girl. She might move on in the meantime. I'd say it's not a good plan. I know. That is why I been on Omegle and trying to see if I can meet someone who is closer to me. At least lives in the San Francisco Bay Area. I know its better to meet people in person but its hard to break the ice int oa conversation. Omegle is fairly easy because people are on Omegle for thing and that is to meet someone. I'm a college student full or girls but they all are about they own business so I know I would get ignored and I don't have a reason to approach them because I don't know what they like and interests are. Sometime I see girls on a bus or train I would liek to meet but I cannot saying anything or else they may think I'm some weirdo or creepy ass dude. I don't have much options here. I know San Francisco has events but I don't know when they have them and by the time I do its already on going and I be like I didn't know this was going on. Again even I attend an event I'm sure I would approach anyone woman, and would not say anything unless she said something first to me. If I see a girl speak first to me then I'll know its safe to talk to her knowing that she won't feel I'm a creepy or weird. That is why I use Omegle.
BluEyeL Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 When you are in class at your college, I'd look for a girl I like, but who also looks a bit shy (not the noisy, outgoing ones who travel in packs), and I'll start sitting next to her in class, walking with her from building to building, offering help with homework or asking quesitons about homework. And if she seems to respond, after a month or two, ask her to go out to celebrate an exam or something. That's how my ex husband approached me in college. Later, when I moved into the US alone without him (in 1999) for the first 6 months since my arrival and was going to UC Davis for grad school, that's also how another guy tried to court me. So that's how it's done in college if you are shy. Not online.
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 When you are in class at your college, I'd look for a girl I like, but who also looks a bit shy (not the noisy, outgoing ones who travel in packs), and I'll start sitting next to her in class, walking with her from building to building, offering help with homework or asking quesitons about homework. And if she seems to respond, after a month or two, ask her to go out to celebrate an exam or something. That's how my ex husband approached me in college. Later, when I moved into the US alone without him (in 1999) for the first 6 months since my arrival and was going to UC Davis for grad school, that's also how another guy tried to court me. So that's how it's done in college if you are shy. Not online. I would do something like that but then I feel that she might think do I have some else better to do then walk with her to another class. I guess I had horrible experience where I actually encountered this sort of stuff. I talk to girls in my class at school but they all taken so not much to do there. I have some shyness but I'm not too shy its just the fact that its hard to break the ice because I don't know what to say and that girl may wonder why am I talking to and trying to talk to her. I guess I'm over thinking what the out comes could be. I would like to meet a girl in school, but not too sure if I can pull that off.
Author Locust Posted April 18, 2013 Author Posted April 18, 2013 I also read online that American women are much more materialistic than European women. Given the fact I'm still working on my career yet and don't have my own place yet, I think it will be hard with American women as they expect so much. This is one of the reasons why I want to be with someone from Europe rather than America. If there are American women who will except me for me instead of materials than I will stick within in my own country.
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