Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 Your Ex and Sing's Ex are losers, right? What does that say about you and Sing since you decided to date, enter into a relationship with them, sleep with them, fall in love with them, etc. and stay with them for a long, long time? Sing dumped a guy before the Ex therefore she is a loser who didn't see the guys value and know his worth... Why are you talking to her and helping her out? According to you she was / is a loser, right? I love how people have to tear down and destroy all the good times, memories, special moments, etc. and their Ex... To feel better about themselves. In my case... My self-worth, self-esteem, validation and approval comes from within so I don't have to go the route. Since I actually LOVED the person I was with... I hope they find the happiness and whatever it is / who they are looking for. Some people on here are going to be very, very bitter, gender haters and angry when they get in the there late 20s after all the dating / LTRs / Break ups you will experience. We are all entitled to our own opinions, but there's no need for insults. And I never said my ex was actually a loser and my ex before him was not either, just not the one for me. Unfortunately I had to learn the hard way that my current ex wasn't either. He has every right to date if he wants to, but he didn't have to lie to me and say he needed to be alone if he just wanted to end the relationship, the truth is fine, I'm a big girl I can handle it. I'm going to be corny and quote Sarah Jessica Parker from Sex & the City: "Most women aren't angry, irrational psychos. We just want an ending to a relationship that is thoughtful and decent and honors what we had together."
Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 I agree he didn't have to mislead you on the reasons why he broke up BUT... A Break Up is still a Break Up not matter what reason they give (truth or not) and the relationship is over. In the future, when someone dumps you... Assume it's over for good! Don't think it's a break, a timeout, fight for him, chase him, plead with him, beg for him, wait around, etc. Oh I learned my lesson, for sure!
ThatJustHappened Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 TJH can I get the plane ticket to hawaii? Hashtag willingtodoanything :-) Only if you're willing to sleep with my ex...
ThatJustHappened Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 Actually that did help, but I'm sorry you got dumped on your bday...that's the worst! It must have felt good to shoot him down when he came crawling back though? Honestly, at this point I don't even care. It doesn't feel good or bad, I'm just completely indifferent. Although I do hope he has herpes..
Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 Honestly, at this point I don't even care. It doesn't feel good or bad, I'm just completely indifferent. Although I do hope he has herpes.. I can't wait to get to indifference... 1
ThatJustHappened Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 I can't wait to get to indifference... You will. I thought I would NEVEREVEREVEREVEREVEREVER get there..he was the love of my life, I'd never get over him..blah blah blah. Now I laugh at my younger self for not realizing what a complete tool bag he is. I wasted 5 years of my life on that asshat!! Blech!!! I had a light switch moment. Suddenly a switch flipped in my head and I just stopped caring. That will happen to you too. It will shock you when it does because you won't even see it coming. When it happened to me, I kept poking at it like an old bruise to see if it still hurt, and it just didn't. 4
Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 You will. I thought I would NEVEREVEREVEREVEREVEREVER get there..he was the love of my life, I'd never get over him..blah blah blah. Now I laugh at my younger self for not realizing what a complete tool bag he is. I wasted 5 years of my life on that asshat!! Blech!!! I had a light switch moment. Suddenly a switch flipped in my head and I just stopped caring. That will happen to you too. It will shock you when it does because you won't even see it coming. When it happened to me, I kept poking at it like an old bruise to see if it still hurt, and it just didn't. Asshat may be my new fav word lol Yeah I can't wait, that will be a good day! 1
Am4Real Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 Wait, wait, wait...I want that too! We are all entitled to our own opinions, but there's no need for insults. And I never said my ex was actually a loser and my ex before him was not either, just not the one for me. Unfortunately I had to learn the hard way that my current ex wasn't either. He has every right to date if he wants to, but he didn't have to lie to me and say he needed to be alone if he just wanted to end the relationship, the truth is fine, I'm a big girl I can handle it. I'm going to be corny and quote Sarah Jessica Parker from Sex & the City: "Most women aren't angry, irrational psychos. We just want an ending to a relationship that is thoughtful and decent and honors what we had together." 2
Mack05 Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 Only if you're willing to sleep with my ex... hhhmmmmmmm.......okay........................I'm going to need some beer 1
destroyed4sho Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 yeah just read ur OP. That is why I never believe the external circumstances excuse or i need space bs. sorry this happened but it is a good step towards getting over him. I always felt your posts lacked anger and were a bit hopeful...Glad you can move on. 1
lavenderlove Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 "If he's stupid enough to let you go, be smart enough to walk away." I like your signature. It sums up my situation...and yours. 2
iouaname Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 sing, I think you and I have both had big weeks in kind of helping to get over them. I read your posts previously and it seemed like you were kind of in the same boat as I was, hoping that he would come back and realize his mistake. I think now both of us realize what kind of people our ex's are and can hopefully move on a bit quicker! I know that it feels like a slap in the face, but it was probably the push needed to get out of the 'waiting around' slump... Also - the thread title is wrong, you're not an idiot! 1
ThatJustHappened Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 hhhmmmmmmm.......okay........................I'm going to need some beer Oh he'll get you drunk..don't you worry about that. He'll also feed you..he's actually a really good cook. That's probably why he still gets laid at all since his personality stinks like a dirty diaper. 1
Mack05 Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 Oh he'll get you drunk..don't you worry about that. He'll also feed you..he's actually a really good cook. That's probably why he still gets laid at all since his personality stinks like a dirty diaper. See it's a moral dilemma. I am the straightest man on god's green hurt. I've never been with a guy and have never even remotely thought about it BUT Hawaii... Anyway I bet I am a better cook 2
Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 yeah just read ur OP. That is why I never believe the external circumstances excuse or i need space bs. sorry this happened but it is a good step towards getting over him. I always felt your posts lacked anger and were a bit hopeful...Glad you can move on. destroyed- Absolutely. Finding out about his new chick really is a blessing in disguise. Otherwise I would have probably spent more months crying over him while he's screwing her and laughing about how pathetic I am. I just hate the thought that he's most likely calling her his "Mrs" and saying all that crap about being together forever! But I know I need to push those thoughts away and focus on my healing. How are you doing?
Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 sing, I think you and I have both had big weeks in kind of helping to get over them. I read your posts previously and it seemed like you were kind of in the same boat as I was, hoping that he would come back and realize his mistake. I think now both of us realize what kind of people our ex's are and can hopefully move on a bit quicker! I know that it feels like a slap in the face, but it was probably the push needed to get out of the 'waiting around' slump... Also - the thread title is wrong, you're not an idiot! Thanks I appreciate that. And its time we get out of this boat and land on new shores! lol
Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 Hey sing, I'm sorry you had to find out about it, I'm also in a similar boat, JUST this weekend I was telling my friend I felt like I'm moving on, and that same friend ran into him the next day randomly and I creeped him and found out he has a new girl. My ex also broke up with me via text, thought I will say I was overseas, and he could have still done so on Skype. Even when I was back, he didn't want to say it to my face. Pathetic.. It really hurts sing but think about it: is this the kind of love you want for yourself? If he really valued you, why would he not have enough respect to say it to your face? Also, it's either that he didn't value you in the first place, or he is rebounding. Either way, you're better off! Your post reminded me so much of my own experience at the moment, because I too want someone older. It sucks when you FINALLY feel like you're moving on and something just pops up, just the other day I posted on LS also about moving on and it feels like a regression to square one all over again. However, I think Mack gave great advice about understanding your flaws, and it's easy to feel like you weren't adequate because of all the rejection.. but I read recently "Your value does not diminish just because someone does not understand your worth". So I think these losers just don't have the capacity to understand a good thing, and in the end it's their loss. Even if he doesn't realize how much he lost, the fact that he doesn't have the capacity to appreciate you and your worth means that HE is unworthy of your time, so don't think otherwise.. Stay strong, you've already come this far, and sooner than later you won't be hurting xx It def hurts knowing their with someone else, especially when you remember how they promised you the world. But our ex's will never replace us, they can only down-grade! 1
Addison312 Posted April 17, 2013 Posted April 17, 2013 WOW. I've been secretly thinking that if anyone on this board and their ex would have a chance of working things out, it'd be you and that douche-hole. I am SO sorry he ended up being this way. I just don't understand....and it makes me wonder if my ex broke up with me for someone else. Ouch. Sing, I agree with the others that the huge gleaming silver lining is that you won't ever look back. Your life is 100% yours and now you can heal and find someone perfect. I know you will because you're a good egg. God bless you. 1
Author singme2sleep Posted April 17, 2013 Author Posted April 17, 2013 WOW. I've been secretly thinking that if anyone on this board and their ex would have a chance of working things out, it'd be you and that douche-hole. I am SO sorry he ended up being this way. I just don't understand....and it makes me wonder if my ex broke up with me for someone else. Ouch. Sing, I agree with the others that the huge gleaming silver lining is that you won't ever look back. Your life is 100% yours and now you can heal and find someone perfect. I know you will because you're a good egg. God bless you. I know, me too!! My best friend said to me a few weeks ago, that she really thought I had found The One. And thank you, that's very nice of you. Bless you too Addison!
LostOne1 Posted April 18, 2013 Posted April 18, 2013 I know, me too!! My best friend said to me a few weeks ago, that she really thought I had found The One. And thank you, that's very nice of you. Bless you too Addison! The times I have heard that haha.. people are always like you looked like the couple that would be together forever... But I guess looks can be deceiving 1
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