A realization, and positive thinking techniques

[ana0pera]

I've been pretty miserable for a while lately and then the other day, while I was sitting under lemon trees at my University (oh how I love California) wearing sunglasses so that no one could see the tears welling in my eyes, it hit me, WTF is wrong with me? Why am I allowing myself to drown in a pity party?

 

I realized that I have so much to be happy for even though there is a lot of sorrow in my life too. I've been feeding off of my own negative energy for over a year, and also the negative energy of others who don't think they're good enough. I realized that I have to stop this and do what I came here to do, live the life I've wanted ever since I was a little girl, the life I've fought so hard and worked so hard for that is within reach. The only thing holding me back now is myself. Not poverty, education, or even other people. The only thing holding me back is myself, my negativity.

 

I started to play a game with myself, that I call "Things I have that others do not." What I often did while wallowing in pity and sorrow is think about all the things I don't have. Like I don't have the body I want, or the ability to be with my then-bf every day, or a lot of friends here. With this new game though I focus on everything I do have, from little things to big things.

I have received a world-class education at some of the best Universities in the world and I didn't have to pay a penny for it.

 

I've been to countries many people will never go to, walked in forests and on beaches that might not be here in a few decades.

 

I've seen animals that come straight from story books.

 

I've never been homeless or feared being homeless.

 

I've never gone hungry.

 

I have a very loving, if not slightly overbearing, family that would always

accept me no matter how hard I am on myself.

 

I've held fossils that are millions of years old.

 

I have a body that many women are jealous of even though I myself am not always happy with it.

 

the list goes on and on. I am keeping a journal of these kinds of thoughts as they come to me, and I take time to update it each night.

 

The idea is to have it as a sort of epi-pen for when I start being negative, I can pull it out and reflect on all the things (serious and silly) that I have that others do not. Will quickly put life back into perspective, I hope.

 

I would highly recommend this to anyone who is negative. There is always someone who has it worse than you and knowing that is humbling. It's easy to forget though. I can't speak for everyone but I know that I have a tendency to overdramatize my problems and that doesn't make them any less real, but in the grand scheme of things it isn't the end of the world. I just need to grab the reigns harder to regain control of my life.

 

Has anyone tried this positive thinking technique? Or have other ones to suggest? Feel free to add to this list things you have that others don't, it could be fun to compare

[dougmccoy]

this is a very great idea. makes me realize how blessed i am

[Cutiepie1976]

Every morning, when I first wake up, I think of three things that I should be thankful for.

 

I also find yoga a great way to recenter and refocus myself, in particular, that five minutes at the start and end of each session, when you're just meditating. It's funny, when I first started practicing yoga, I often skipped the meditation at the end.

 

Finally, it's just very hard for me to feel like I have it bad, no matter what my luck may be. I had multiple opportunities to work and live with the destitute in the developing world when I was a student. It was one of the best gifts I ever received. It gives you perspective. Many of us are truly blessed. Ironically, the people with nothing tend to be the happiest and most content people, the ones who remain optimistic and "can-do" in attitude when faced with a daunting challenge...and the ones willling to give you the shirt off their back...quite literally, if they think you might benefit. No FML thoughts or rants about how unfair life is for them. They just focus on what they can obtain through their own hard work, ingenuity, and perseverance. Some inspiring success stories. So yes, thankful for the reminder they give me.

 

Thanks for starting this thread! Great topic!