Emotional Reasoning vs Logical Reasoning, share your thoughts

[seanmathews3]

Please feel free to share your opinions and thoughts based on your experiences, please respect other people’s opinions if they don’t match yours, everyone has different experiences.

 

 

Im 22 and have had only a handful of relationships, nothing insanely long but they average 3-6 months. I’ve been very focused on my career and education which is why I haven’t been in many and also why they haven’t lasted a very long time, simply put I value my time a lot. They have all ended for different reasons (her/my terms, good/bad terms, relocation, career reasons), the attraction and feelings during these relationships have been strong, only a few had the “L” word thrown in there or close to. But after the break up, during the process of moving on/healing, I’ll start thinking… I know.. *duh-duh-duh-duuuhhh*

 

 

There is always a clash between my emotional reasoning and logical reasoning, and it seems like a never ending game of Pong.

 

 

For my emotional reasoning ( at least for those relationships that were going well and ended on somewhat good terms) – I’ll start thinking of all the good times and strong feelings in the relationship, start wondering if that person could be the “one”, wondering if I would end up finding anyone else in the future who makes me feel like this, wondering if in 5-10 years ill look back regretting letting this one go, or regretting moving on from this one. Looking at it from many aspects; the personality, feelings, comfortableness, humor, sex, goals, values, chemistry, our bond, and wonder if this is as good as it gets and not to pass it up.

 

 

Minutes later, ill look at it with logical reasoning - I’ll think of the few negative parts of the relationship or the person, and I’ll notice certain things that I personally wouldn’t want to see in a long term relationship or life-time partner, or perhaps ill compare them to what my idea of my “future soulmate” is. Also that I don’t want to get tied down and lose a few years just to realize they are not the “one”. I’ll also realize that I am still very young and don’t want to get settled down or take things too serious. I want to finish my education Bachelors/Masters, get my career started, travel and live it up and do crazy things while im young and single, without feeling tied down or restricted. I want to find that “one” person later down the road.

 

 

But at the same time, a part of me wonders if one day it’ll be too late and that I passed up the “one” earlier in my life. ( A clear Pong game example)

 

 

I hope this all makes sense in a way or some of you can relate. And behind the logical thinking, I have quite a few older close friends/mentors (in their 30’s, 40’s, and 50’s), and they all tell me I don’t want to get settled down this young, I wanna focus on my career/schooling, traveling and living up my life, and enjoy being young while it lasts, that I have all the time in the world to find the “one” and get married and stuff down the road. So it’s not just my “inexperienced young” thoughts behind this.

 

 

What are your opinions and thoughts? Maybe you agree, disagree, or have had the same clash go on in your head before?

 

Thanks for reading, I’m excited to see what different views everyone has.

Edited April 16, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Kamille]

I think you're confusing logical reasoning with critical/negative reasoning.

 

A logical person looks at benefits as much as costs/negatives.

 

What you call logical reasoning only focuses on the negatives.

[BluEyeL]

I think he means that sometimes although his mind tells him something, his heart still won't listen. That happens to me too, and I'm old. That's how we get into bad relationships.

[TheGuard13]

Emotional reasoning is rarely "reasoning".