flopply hat Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 I've started dating which has mainly been through 'on line'. Chatted to some very interesting people which is great even if I never get to meet them. One guy I chatted to for a while asked to meet me and i was very happy to do so. He is really a lovely person and we get on well. Two problems though, he traveled 150miles to meet with me and appears to be very keen but I don't have an attraction for him. He wants to come and see me again but I feel this is unfair. Would like him as a friend but i don't know the words to use to let him know this....don't like to hurt feelings. Any advice please.
soccerrprp Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 Tell him sorry, but you didn't feel an attraction and that you wish him well in his search to find that someone special. That simple.
grkBoy Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 I've started dating which has mainly been through 'on line'. Chatted to some very interesting people which is great even if I never get to meet them. One guy I chatted to for a while asked to meet me and i was very happy to do so. He is really a lovely person and we get on well. Two problems though, he traveled 150miles to meet with me and appears to be very keen but I don't have an attraction for him. He wants to come and see me again but I feel this is unfair. Would like him as a friend but i don't know the words to use to let him know this....don't like to hurt feelings. Any advice please. Just be honest. Plus, if 150 miles is GU (geographically undesirable), then state that in your profile. I know when I was dating, 20 miles was far enough for me. If I had to drive more than 45 min to see her, then I would rather be alone.
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 I've started dating which has mainly been through 'on line'. Chatted to some very interesting people which is great even if I never get to meet them. One guy I chatted to for a while asked to meet me and i was very happy to do so. He is really a lovely person and we get on well. Two problems though, he traveled 150miles to meet with me and appears to be very keen but I don't have an attraction for him. He wants to come and see me again but I feel this is unfair. Would like him as a friend but i don't know the words to use to let him know this....don't like to hurt feelings. Any advice please. Dating isn't THAT difficult, especially for women. Just tell this guy you're not into him. Then go out with one of the other 50 million guys messaging you on OLD. 1
creighton0123 Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 I had a similar situation with a guy I went on five dates with. While geographically desirable, there wasn't much of a physical attraction on my part. At the fourth date, we made out and hooked up, but even that wasn't pleasurable for me. I was just... really horny. It was more or less about kissing him. I felt zero connection and was, in fact, uncomfortable with it. Still, when we were just talking and hanging out, I had the most amazing time. He would have been a wonderful friend. I was honest with him. He asked me when we would hang out again and I simply said "I'm sorry. You're a great guy and I have been genuinely having an amazing time, but I'm not feeling romantically attracted to you." He understood and we went our separate ways. Honesty in dating is essential. Don't drag things out. They waste your time and they waste the time of other guys who are not interested in friendship.
Estate Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 I've started dating which has mainly been through 'on line'. Chatted to some very interesting people which is great even if I never get to meet them. One guy I chatted to for a while asked to meet me and i was very happy to do so. He is really a lovely person and we get on well. Two problems though, he traveled 150miles to meet with me and appears to be very keen but I don't have an attraction for him. He wants to come and see me again but I feel this is unfair. Would like him as a friend but i don't know the words to use to let him know this....don't like to hurt feelings. Any advice please. You sounds like you're a nice person and don't want to hurt his feelings. But if you don't feel "it" then it's best to just let him know you're not interested. You don't have to be cold, it was one date. Often people just don't even reply to messages but if you don't want to take that route just let him down easy and say you don't see it working out due to distance and other factors. Good luck.
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