MoreThanThat Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 I posted before about a guy I met through business online. We're local half the time (and by end of this year, will be in the same home base). We met online in January and did a business deal. A lot of exchanges but all business related. We were supposed to meet early March but I had something come up and had to cancel. A few days later, I left town and shortly after our business transaction was concluded. Simultaneously we got into regular daily exchange (Skype, phone, text, email, chat) throughout the day. It became more personal but no lines were crossed. I asked him a couple weeks ago if this was just a friendship for him and he said he hadn't considered more given we hadn't met but he wasn't closed to possibilities. Shortly after he had a business trip and although our communication has been normal, I've backed off a good amount in terms of frequency of contact. I really do like him and if chemistry is there, I can see this being something more. But I felt odd spending so much time with someone where things are up in the air. Last weekend he had asked when I was returning. I didn't know then. He asked me to tell him when I knew. A couple days later I told him. Non-responsive. Nothing regarding meeting or even showing enthusiasm. We both had a busy day and little contact throughout. I felt frustrated and when we next talked that day, I asked him didn't he want to meet me. He said he assumed we would. Then mentioned coffee and tell him when/where. I suggested 3 days after I arrived at a place near him since I'd be in the area with a mutual friend. He can't do it that weekend (prior commitment and a valid one). He then says let's do dinner during the week and to tell him when I was free. Although I was glad to see him change coffee to dinner (we've had 6 hour telephone conversations), I felt a little offput about the lack of enthusiasm. He is VERY alpha and I keep expecting him to be more aggressive. We both have busy schedules but he's got joint custody of 2 kids and has them quite a bit. I turned around and said - why don't you give me a couple of options and I can confirm I'm free. When he didn't immediately respond, I said I'm not getting in for a couple of weeks so why don't we wait for time to get closer. He said okay. Argh! By contrast to this situation, 3 men I barely know (only one who I've met) who found out my arrival time asked me out right away. Two of them are actually ones I think could be interesting possibilities and all 3 seem to be great men. I'm just so confused right now. From the get go, I've felt like I should move on. My gut is usually right but it's conflicted here. I hate the idea of multi-dating. I don't know if I should just wait to see what happens or if I should go ahead and set up dates with the other men. I had begged them off saying give me a few days to get my schedule arranged for business and all were understanding. I don't even know what will happen when I meet the guy in person - there may be no attraction at all.
flopply hat Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 Go on the other dates, why not. In my opinion you may have pushed him when he wasn't ready and he has backed off.
Author MoreThanThat Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 Go on the other dates, why not. In my opinion you may have pushed him when he wasn't ready and he has backed off. Wasn't ready for what? We've been in limbo for over a month because of not meeting. He's a very outgoing/social person. I have initiated *maybe* 5% of our communications and have never called him - it's all been from his side.
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