Dox Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 I just met this girl online, we've been messaging back and forth everyday for a week now. Yesterday she messaged me and said "Honestly don't know what to say right now as I kind of have a headache. Sorry." she also messaged me a joke before that in reply to my last message. I'm just confused if she had nothing to say and isn't interested why bother replying? I just replied "Lol sounds like a hangover? "When you're better and feel like talking just drop me a text *******" she replied "I don't drink.. So not a hang over. Pretty sure I'm sick." Thats it she hasn't text me or anything. So i don't know if shes interested or not. She did say in her profile that she was shy and never the one to start a conversation maybe shes interested but just having trouble thinking of things to say. Reason I haven't asked to meet with her is because she lives 5 hours away. So anyway, move on or?
creighton0123 Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 Sounds like you let it drag on via email/messaging for far too long. Have you spoken on the phone and made plans to meet up? OLD is great to get things started, but you should treat it exactly how you would treat it if you met in person: talk for a bit, exchange numbers, plan a date, go on a date, plan a second date, go on a second date, etc. Too much emailing back and forth becomes monotonous, boring, and counter productive to romance. You can literally reduce five to ten dates worth of conversation into lengthy emails that take a few minutes to type out. 3
Author Dox Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 Sounds like you let it drag on via email/messaging for far too long. Have you spoken on the phone and made plans to meet up? OLD is great to get things started, but you should treat it exactly how you would treat it if you met in person: talk for a bit, exchange numbers, plan a date, go on a date, plan a second date, go on a second date, etc. Too much emailing back and forth becomes monotonous, boring, and counter productive to romance. You can literally reduce five to ten dates worth of conversation into lengthy emails that take a few minutes to type out. We've been messaging for a week, 7 messages from her and 7 from me, I don't think thats too much. Online dating is a bit different than in person. You're talking to a complete stranger behind a computer. No we haven't talked in person or made any plans to meet. Shes actually 8 hours drive from where I am. But I'd love to meet up. I just don't know how to reply to her last message. I already given her my number and she hasn't done anything. anyone have any ideas on how to reply to that message?
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 You can ask if she's feeling better. If she responds, tell her that you'd enjoy speaking with her by phone, give her your number again, and suggest she call or text you, whichever would be more comfortable for her. Seven messages on the dating site is 4 or 5 too many in my book. The dating site is for introductions, not carrying out a pseudo-relationship as you have been doing. Get off the site. Your focus should be on progressing things towards meeting the person, not racking your brain for new topics for your next message. Besides, it's very easy to offend a stranger when they get your messages in a vacuum and know almost nothing about you. Also, you aren't the only guy speaking to her. It's in your interest to meet promptly. Reason I haven't asked to meet with her is because she lives 5 hours away. So anyway, move on or? Hate to be blunt, but if you're too far away to meet, what was the point? What were you hoping to accomplish with all the messaging? I can't speak specifically to her objectives, or to yours for that matter. Please be aware that many, but certainly not all, people on an OLD site are looking to meet and date, not just have a messaging partner. You should be working on getting to a date. If you can't travel that distance on a regular basis easily, then look at a those people in a more practical radius. That's Dating 101. If she resists moving to an actual meeting, then she doesn't want to meet and you move on immediately to someone who does, rather than wasting time trying to convince someone that you are worth meeting. If you aren't looking to date in the immediate future, but rather just want a text and message buddy, then other online platforms might be a better option for connecting with likeminded folks. Good luck! 2
love1336x Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 lol, yes move on quicklyyyy! She wants to be chase!
Esoteric Elf Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 There was a girl that I messaged that mysteriously had headaches and bouts of dizziness everytime I suggested we go out together. The very same night she wanted to "sleep off the headache" she went out with some chump, and he posted on her Facebook wall thanking her for such a great night, which she promptly deleted. Could be her way of telling you, "I'm not interested anymore". Gotta love online dating.
Author Dox Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 We have a lot of things in common more than any other girls I've talked to online or even any girls I met in person. I know we live to far apart but I would do anything for the right person. I'm not saying she is, but it would be fun to find out. lol. Anyways I messaged her one last time saying it was great chatting with her and i would like to get to know her more and I want to talk to her blah blah blah. So if shes not interested, she won't reply so then I'll move on.
Author Dox Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 If you aren't looking to date in the immediate future, but rather just want a text and message buddy, then other online platforms might be a better option for connecting with likeminded folks. Good luck! I am interested in dating thats why I joined an OLD
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 She may be the most perfect match for you on paper and in messages, but if she won't meet or even chat on the phone, that is worth exactly nothing. Not sure if you're new to OLD. What you quickly realize is you can't determine "connection" until you actually meet in person. Spending a lot of time online is generally wasted time. Not to mention some people have no intention of ever meeting, and are simply catfishing you. Don't let them waste your time. 2
debber01 Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 Good call Cutie Pie. Love that show Catfish and was catfished once myself. I agree--take it to a meet and greet ASAP. If you keep texting without the f2f, it builds expectations, which, after too long in the virtual world, can't possibly be met. You may think you have 'chemistry' online, but until you meet f2f, you really won't know. And after building those expectations online for too long, reality can be quite a disappointment. 1
creighton0123 Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 We've been messaging for a week, 7 messages from her and 7 from me, I don't think thats too much. Online dating is a bit different than in person. You're talking to a complete stranger behind a computer. No we haven't talked in person or made any plans to meet. Shes actually 8 hours drive from where I am. But I'd love to meet up. I just don't know how to reply to her last message. I already given her my number and she hasn't done anything. anyone have any ideas on how to reply to that message? OLD shouldn't be any different than dating in person. Still, most people treat it differently. In my opinion, OLD should be exactly like meeting someone in person. You learn a bit about them, exchange numbers, and schedule a date within a week. Then, once you have that first date, you no longer communicate with them through an OLD site. I digress. Her headache message seemed uber-convenient on her part. I'd move on.
readytodate123 Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 I think she's waiting for you to make the next move. Just ask her if she wants to meet up and see how she reacts. A phone/video call would be awkward but not a bad idea either.
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