gd1039 Posted September 16, 2004 Posted September 16, 2004 Please read this link to a previous thread of mine for more info about the situation: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t47437/ And my little update because either I am an idiot, or she is just not interested. So, I ran into this girl outside of class the other day, we talked for a minute but I had to go do some work. Then it hit me that I never asked how everything went when she had to go back home. So, I looked around the library (where I saw her) but she was gone. So I took charge and rang her up to see where she was and if she wanted to meet up for a little bit because it turned out my HW wasn't due until next week. So I go over to meet her for a few minutes, we chat some more and I asked how everything went. Turns out I was right that she wasn't close to her grandma and that is probably why she didn't seem to upset in her message she had left me. So after class the other day I catch up with her in the hall and asked her if she wanted to go to the zoo today since we didn't have school. She said she wasn't sure what she had going on yet but she would get back to me. Guess who never called. The more I think about it I feel I made one fatal mistake. I was so worried about trying to show interest and not fall into the friend category that I rushed asking her on a date. I never actually got to know very much about this girl but I had planned that when we went out I could ask her questions and find out more about her. So I called yesterday and I was going to say how I realized I don't really know much about her and find out more then, but I got her voicemail (didnt leave a message) and she didn't call back (caller ID). So, now I think I either messed up by making the mistake of not getting to know much about her. She had given some signals she was interested in me, but maybe I read them wrong and she just wanted to be friends. So, should I just let it go, call her and go with my idea of just trying to find out more about her (even though she stiffed me today) or wait for class and see if she still sits near me and then strike up the convo?
savethedrama4allama Posted September 16, 2004 Posted September 16, 2004 Oh man, if a guy had asked me to the zoo I would have been all over that, its so cute. Wait for class and then strike up the convo if she sits next to you, IMO. You did the right thing and called but got no reply, and it may be a sign. Unfortunately no one here knows what she is thinking, so just let it ride for a while and see how she acts toward you. You sound like a sweet guy who might be trying a bit too hard. I don't think its anything you did wrong like not getting to know her well enough.
xale Posted September 16, 2004 Posted September 16, 2004 All I have to say is that the title of your post really is what I was thinking to... (don't give up you havent messed it up yet I think..) (well, DON'T GIVE UP!!)
Author gd1039 Posted September 19, 2004 Author Posted September 19, 2004 savethedrama - Yea, I kinda thought the zoo would be a cool idea since I haven't been there in a long time, and its not your cliche dinner and movie. I'll see what happens in class this week and basically let her make a move now. You may be right that maybe I tried too hard, and you are definitly right about me sounding like a sweet guy . xale - Its good to know people don't think I am completely sunk yet. Hopefully things will turn around some this week. I plan on letting her be the one to sit next to me, or walk up to me after class and chat because if she is interested she will probably do one of these. If she isn't interested and I do it, I will look desperate. In any event, I will update later in the week with what (if anything) happened.
blue17 Posted September 19, 2004 Posted September 19, 2004 smart move on letting her do the 'work'...in terms of starting a convo or whatever. By not chasing her.....you do 2 things. 1) You can test whether she is interested. You put forth the effort for inviting her out and such....so you're essentially putting the ball in her court. If she wants to talk....she is perfectly able to. This is much better than chasing her around, where you never know whether she is truly interested or just being polite. 2) Make yourself more attractive by not chasing her. It'll appear like you have better things to do than fawn over her (which you should), and that'll make her a little jealous or envyous that she isn't the center of attention. However, I don't think the excuse of not getting to know her enough is the reason why she became disinterested (or was just being polite). That reason sounds like more of a copout....it could be numerous things...but there is not enough info to be able to tell from your posts. Good luck.
Recommended Posts