richard9 Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Ever consider that your level of happiness was raised during your relationship and to move on now they are gone is to accept your circumstances that they are not coming back, and more importantly accept that your happiness level will not be as high as when you were with them but this is where you are now. I think there is a little comfort to knowing and accepting this and realising that it is not the same as it was and that you can learn to appreciate what you have left. Just some random thoughts. 1
Am4Real Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Many us find ourselves gravitating between denial and acceptance. At first we deny it is even possible, then we accept it but only for short period while we enter stages of denial. As they alternate the acceptance phase becomes longer, kind of like the coming days of summer here in the northern hemisphere...it's now a matter of time as the length of acceptance will eventually take over...stay strong and work through these alternating phases. 3
Author richard9 Posted April 13, 2013 Author Posted April 13, 2013 Many us find ourselves gravitating between denial and acceptance. At first we deny it is even possible, then we accept it but only for short period while we enter stages of denial. As they alternate the acceptance phase becomes longer, kind of like the coming days of summer here in the northern hemisphere...it's now a matter of time as the length of acceptance will eventually take over...stay strong and work through these alternating phases. I think once the acceptance is there that the happiness level has dropped we can learn to build a tolerance for our reduced level. Its not to say we wont feel that happiness level again, its saying this is where I am and I accept at this point in time my life will not be as it was when I was with my ex. I do understand what you are saying about phases but I do try to seek continuity through adjusting my mindset. I accept my happiness now will not touch how it was with my ex, this is what I have and I must build a tolerence to my new happiness level and accept it is where I am.
Feelin Frisky Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Of course. I can't say I'm happy in accepting it though. I revel in that I didn't commit legally to someone I'd wind up in divorce with. It's impossible to tell who will be bad for you though. I wish there were a way to know that right away--but you'll know it when the "tell" comes.
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