Pompeii Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 I want to know how true is this? I've heard from several people that if a girl really likes you, she will let you know in one form or another. I find it safe to assume that a girl has never liked me because I have never gotten any signs of interest from a girl. Anyone have any experiences confirming or denying this?
carhill Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 In the end all that matters is the one who liked you enough to hold your hand and look into your eyes as you pass into the nether. All the rest, in my life experience, is nebulous and transitory. That's OK. I paid my debt to the person who taught me that. You won't know, not for sure, or no woman will have ever liked you. Good luck.
zebracolors Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 To an extent, Nyseto has a point, we often hide what we're feeling because sometimes we're not sure about you guys either;). But speaking for myself (and recent experience), if I'm interested in exploring the possibility of more than just friendship, but maybe not sure how he is feeling, I might go to reach for his hand like if we're walking around. Its a just a simple gesture of affection and trust but it quietly asks him if he trusts you. But that gesture doesn't need to mean anything more than that but its a good sign that she likes your company. And also (as Carhill mentioned) I try to keep eye contact, to show how interested I am, that I really care about what he's saying. Women are often told that a guy will usually make his intentions known pretty clearly and that if she really is interested, she'll need to make it clear. But if he is not sure how the girl is feeling, she doesn't know how he feels..potentially tragic scenario no? At some point, don't you think someone has to make the move to indicate where his or feelings are.
Esoteric Elf Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Anyone have any experiences confirming or denying this? Not true. Otherwise the "he loves me, he loves me not" game would not have been conceived.
Star Gazer Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 It is true, but you cannot sit on your hands and do nothing. You must do the approaching. Her response and receptivity is how you will know. 1
Lst11 Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Sometimes girls are only friendly but this doesn't mean that they don't like you. Just be confident in yourself and act
Feelin Frisky Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 No. I had chicks suddenly present their lips for kissing who I thought hated me. I was gob-smacked. I also heard admissions of crushes I never had a clue of. One I was friendly with and even asked out once but she said no. Then years later I found out that she said she always wanted me. Damn. I wanted her. So, the answer is no. You can't always tell and women don't all act the same way in how they show or don't show interest. 1
Author Pompeii Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 Damn. I was afraid of these answers. I feel like I would mistake interest for non-interest and non-interest for interest. For example, if a girl is friendly to me, I just think that she may be interested in me but then I quickly dismiss it out of my mind because I feel like she would be more overt in her actions towards me. When a girl really likes a guy, I feel like she would try and do all efforts to link up with him. That's why I don't really want to go after girls and find out that I'm wasting my time and possibly messing things up. There are definitely a few of my friends that I would go after if there were no residual consequences. Then there's always the thing about getting friend zoned. I've seen a lot of my friends have girls go after them and I feel like if a girl was into me then the same would happen.
tbf Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 I've seen a lot of my friends have girls go after themA starting point. How did your friends act and how did the girls act? Can you detail any patterns?
ThaWholigan Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 Damn. I was afraid of these answers. I feel like I would mistake interest for non-interest and non-interest for interest. For example, if a girl is friendly to me, I just think that she may be interested in me but then I quickly dismiss it out of my mind because I feel like she would be more overt in her actions towards me. When a girl really likes a guy, I feel like she would try and do all efforts to link up with him. That's why I don't really want to go after girls and find out that I'm wasting my time and possibly messing things up. There are definitely a few of my friends that I would go after if there were no residual consequences. Then there's always the thing about getting friend zoned. I've seen a lot of my friends have girls go after them and I feel like if a girl was into me then the same would happen. Some girls will absolutely make some kind of moves or obvious tells - they are usually the more outgoing of the lot. I used to think like you too - no girls ever showed any outright interest in me as far as I was concerned (save for a few times when I was a lot younger). Then as I started to get more socially aware, people would always tell me that there were girls who liked me and I couldn't see it. Maybe I just wasn't as adept at reading interest. Hell, I'm still pretty bad at it. I can read all the body language in the world, take all the subtle interest cues and all of that, but there is a large part of me that suggests that the only surefire way to know if a girl likes you is if she puts your dick inside her . I digress - there are ways you can tell, I've gotten better and noticed all the times in my past that girls were interested, and it was simply their mode of expression that gave it away. Girls are probably into you and you don't know it. That's not your fault, trust me. It happens. Sometimes you do have the unfortunate task of taking the risk and finding out without knowing - but at least half the time you won't know unless she makes it known pretty obviously.
Author Pompeii Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 A starting point. How did your friends act and how did the girls act? Can you detail any patterns? Well, I've seen different types of scenarios. One of them is just a regular hanging out scenario. A girl would express interest in friend, girl asks friend questions, girl makes regular effort to get closer to and learn more about friend. If friend is interest, he will reciprocate. In a bar scenario, a friend will be hit on by a girl or something. Friend will probably reciprocate. I've known friends who have gotten blowjobs in bathrooms, have gotten same-night lays within hours, and have made out in minutes with girls. That is why I feel as if if a girl was into me in some way, shape, or form, I would certainly know.
Author Pompeii Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 What does that mean? I guess what he's trying to say is this notion of "assuming rapport" which means that you go into an interaction with someone assuming the best possible outcome. Except in this case, the outcome is attaining the girl's undivided attraction because you're such an "awesome guy". This technique at its core level is nothing more than an ego protectant/anxiety decrease. It's a nice state of mind to have when you're going up to have a conversation with a girl and it may give you that extra kick, but if you don't really have the will to do so, then you will fail.
DollWelch Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 I find it safe to assume that a girl has never liked me because I have never gotten any signs of interest from a girl. Here is a tidbit for you: Most women will not show signs of interest once knowing you. Such is life. So, with that said, it is your cue to approach every woman you like. Don't wait until she shows interest in you. Note: I am not saying blindly approach every woman. Approach the ones you are comfortable approaching and show a hint of flirtations.
PogoStick Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 One way is to look at actions rather than words. If she agrees to see you she's interested, simple as that. Does she agree to a 2nd, 3rd, 4th date? That's a pretty big sign. Does she come inside or invite you in at the end of the date? Does she linger with you for 5 minutes at her car door at the end of the night? Does she let you take her on a walk, alone in the dark? Actions = signs!
Author Pompeii Posted April 15, 2013 Author Posted April 15, 2013 One way is to look at actions rather than words. If she agrees to see you she's interested, simple as that. Does she agree to a 2nd, 3rd, 4th date? That's a pretty big sign. Does she come inside or invite you in at the end of the date? Does she linger with you for 5 minutes at her car door at the end of the night? Does she let you take her on a walk, alone in the dark? Actions = signs! Well, I wouldn't know, considering I've never been on a date.
Estate Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 I want to know how true is this? I've heard from several people that if a girl really likes you, she will let you know in one form or another. I find it safe to assume that a girl has never liked me because I have never gotten any signs of interest from a girl. Anyone have any experiences confirming or denying this? It's really on the man to take control. Some girls will tell you straight out, Some will show clear signals, Some will show small signals, Even more time than all of the above, they are waiting for the man to be a man and take control. Why do guys want girls to make the move? You know that fear you're feeling of approaching her? Imagine how big the fear is for HER to do the same?
Imported Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 It's really on the man to take control. Some girls will tell you straight out, Some will show clear signals, Some will show small signals, Even more time than all of the above, they are waiting for the man to be a man and take control. Why do guys want girls to make the move? You know that fear you're feeling of approaching her? Imagine how big the fear is for HER to do the same? Now imagine how big the fear is for HIM to do the same! This can go on forever. Until someone mans up. That is why we have that phrase..."man up". Because women do not. Given a tough situation where someone has to do something, a women usually looks towards a man and the man is expected to man up. That is OK with me. There are great benefits to this deal. And honestly, after a while....there is no fear and it seems strange there ever ways. 1
Estate Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 Now imagine how big the fear is for HIM to do the same! This can go on forever. Until someone mans up. That is why we have that phrase..."man up". Because women do not. Given a tough situation where someone has to do something, a women usually looks towards a man and the man is expected to man up. That is OK with me. There are great benefits to this deal. And honestly, after a while....there is no fear and it seems strange there ever ways. Exactly! That's the reason it's called MANNING UP! You have to be the man and do it. Waiting for someone else to do it isn't very manly is a really good reason you won't get any success.
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 Here is a tidbit for you: Most women will not show signs of interest once knowing you. Such is life. So, with that said, it is your cue to approach every woman you like. Don't wait until she shows interest in you. Note: I am not saying blindly approach every woman. Approach the ones you are comfortable approaching and show a hint of flirtations. I was about to "like" this, but I just can't because of the last part. OP should approach every girl he likes, regardless of whether or not he feels comfortable (if anything, he should go out of his way to get out of his comfort zone).
Author Pompeii Posted April 15, 2013 Author Posted April 15, 2013 I was about to "like" this, but I just can't because of the last part. OP should approach every girl he likes, regardless of whether or not he feels comfortable (if anything, he should go out of his way to get out of his comfort zone). Eh, I know I should get out of my comfort zone but if I approached every girl I "liked", I would waste a lot of time.
runner Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 Eh, I know I should get out of my comfort zone but if I approached every girl I "liked", I would waste a lot of time. no, not really. i can usually tell in about 10 mins if my approach is going anywhere; and if not, no worries, just wish her a great day then carry on like its no big deal. wash, rinse, repeat.
Necris Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 TITCR. If you really like a girl, don't let something as small as her initial lack of interest stop you. My attitude: "This girl is in love with me. She just doesn't know it yet." That just sounds like you are setting yourself up for failure, besides we all know that's an obvious lie, how many girls have you approached thinking what you just said and it turned out to be true? Anyway I think if you are interested in someone it is good to approach them even if you don't get signs from them. Now of course this isn't going to be very successful. Look at me for example I've had literally 0 success though I do make the initial approach despite never getting signals. Sometimes though I mistake any sort of kindness or awareness of me as interest but sadly its never true. But one good thing that comes out of this is that you then know for certain she's not interested after you are rejected.
JuneJulySeptember Posted April 22, 2013 Posted April 22, 2013 I want to know how true is this? I've heard from several people that if a girl really likes you, she will let you know in one form or another. I find it safe to assume that a girl has never liked me because I have never gotten any signs of interest from a girl. Anyone have any experiences confirming or denying this? People have what is a "maximum, oh my god hot" limit and a ... "minimum standard" that they will consider. For most women, the minimum standard is actually fairly high. I mean, if you are an average white man, and of average height and build, you can meet it usually, but not everybody is that. That is likely why you have never gotten interest from women.
carhill Posted April 22, 2013 Posted April 22, 2013 Also, 'like' can take many forms: 1. The one OP is inferring, attraction 2. A brother 3. A friend 4. Situational attention 5. A profit center 6. That you like her etc, etc. Their words/actions in the moment pertain to that moment and may appear and be completely different in the next moment. One may get a sense, in one moment, that 'she likes me', but that is one moment and one perception with an array of possible 'likes' in play. Then, poof, it's gone, into the nether of billions of moments in an otherwise short life. IMO, don't dwell on it. Good luck.
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