Kan Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Known this girl from an online game for 5 months. Enjoy playing together, have a lot of common thoughts and interests, and have the same humour. I've felt in the past she might like me but I was in a relationship and never gave any hints to her that I liked her. Relationship ended a few months back and I stopped gaming for a while. Just started playing again and this girl messages me immediately when I log in for the first time in months. We talk a lot and she teases (like she usually does) and tells me how she missed me. Just before we are logging off for the night she talks with me more and then asks me for my real name as well as tells me hers. Next day I log in again and she is teasing me like usual. We have a great time again and at the end just before logging off she asks for my Skype which I give. The next day we talk on skype for about 2 hours during which we exchange pictures and a LOT of flirting. She tells me I am cute, makes all sorts of sexual jokes and things seemed to be going really good. We end on a funny note and log for the night. Next day I send her an image joke half way through the day on skype but she never responds and I never saw her online when I was. I've been very busy so the day went fast and didn't hear from her. Day after that I again never see her on skype (but don't send any more messages to her) and finish the day by logging into the game. She is online but not talking, not interacting with others and not teasing me. She wasn't interested in playing with us (a small group that usually we all play together) and she was just playing solo. I message her and ask if how she is and she says she isn't feeling well. I say "that's too bad, hope you feel better soon, try to get some rest since it's late" and she says "thanks, you're right, I'm just about to head off". We exchange a few jokes and then she logs off without saying bye. I'm very confused because we seemed to hit it off and she was obviously very interested in me. Why ask for my real name and exchange pictures and then suddenly go cold? Or am I really over thinking this?
PogoStick Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 You're overthinking it because she's a person you don't have a real relationship with. 2
outsidethebox Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 It isn't just you, she was solo and told you she wasn't feeling well. She initiated getting each other's contact info, now it's your turn. Send her a private message telling her whatever cool stuff gamers tell each other that is equivalent to want to hang out with you. Even if you can't because of distance. Tell her anyway.
Author Kan Posted April 13, 2013 Author Posted April 13, 2013 You're overthinking it because she's a person you don't have a real relationship with. I know and that's why I am unsure about it. I was hoping to get to know her more and talk to her, and that she would want that with me too. It isn't just you, she was solo and told you she wasn't feeling well. She initiated getting each other's contact info, now it's your turn. Send her a private message telling her whatever cool stuff gamers tell each other that is equivalent to want to hang out with you. Even if you can't because of distance. Tell her anyway. The distance is workable and we spend a lot of time online together anyway so it doesn't concern me that much. I know that she keeps her name/gender/voice/picture a secret and I can understand why, as she is extremely attractive and would get hit on by every single guy on the internet if they knew. Also that's part of the reason why I was surprised at her sudden coldness, because she definitely was showing lots of interest both before and after we were talking more. I guess I was just kind of expecting that she would be eager to learn more about me and I would have more opportunity to learn about her before I'd make that date. I know I left her very curious about some things as a tease for the next time we would talk, and she was very surprised (in a good way) when she saw what I looked like which really stepped up the flirting from her.
Divasu Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 I guess I was just kind of expecting that she would be eager to learn more about me and I would have more opportunity to learn about her before I'd make that date. But, isn't that how you learn about the other person, through dates? You know, spending time together doing things with each other. That sort of thing. Sometimes, it actually works! Okay, maybe not on the first date, so you go on a second date, and then on a third date et cetera, et cetera. 1
Author Kan Posted April 13, 2013 Author Posted April 13, 2013 (edited) But, isn't that how you learn about the other person, through dates? You know, spending time together doing things with each other. That sort of thing. Sometimes, it actually works! Okay, maybe not on the first date, so you go on a second date, and then on a third date et cetera, et cetera. Haha, good point I guess online dating is new territory for me. My idea of a date was always to see someone in person but the 6 hour drive makes that challenging during my busy schedule right now. I'll try to think of something creative. Edited April 13, 2013 by Kan
Divasu Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Haha, good point I guess online dating is new territory for me. My idea of a date was always to see someone in person but the 6 hour drive makes that challenging during my busy schedule right now. I'll try to think of something creative. I didn't realize you were that far away from each other. Yes, that throws a bit of an obstacle into things. You don't want to know all about the other person before you meet, it's much more organic and fun when you get to do that sort of thing together one-on-one. But you're talking to someone who is more "old school", when I first started dating in life and in relationships, we didn't have online anything.
Author Kan Posted April 13, 2013 Author Posted April 13, 2013 (edited) I didn't realize you were that far away from each other. Yes, that throws a bit of an obstacle into things. You don't want to know all about the other person before you meet, it's much more organic and fun when you get to do that sort of thing together one-on-one. But you're talking to someone who is more "old school", when I first started dating in life and in relationships, we didn't have online anything. Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. My last relationship was a 2h drive long distance and we didn't know much about each other when I started making the drive to go on dates with her, even though we interacted mostly through instant messenger prior (after I met her though a mutual friend). Even though I've grown up in the online era, I still prefer to see people in person to get to know them. As you said, it's a lot more fun that way. I guess in this case just because of the distance involved it's quite an investment of time to make that trip, so my natural inclination is to find some time to talk to her online to get to know her simply due to the fact that we wouldn't be able to go on physical dates frequently. However, her going cold put a wrench into that plan, and made me doubt a bit whether she has any interest after a single day of talking (which I perceived to be a good day). Edited April 13, 2013 by Kan
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