picaso28 Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 So seccond online date, goes ok but don't make move. She texts though saying enjoyed it but pressure of first kiss is killing her. I reply with let me make it up to you, dinner at my place which she agrees. Text her asking her for date she is free. No reply. Text today about a film we spoke about but couldn't remember name, she replies with cool, will check it out. Blown off?
ComeUpOutDaWahta Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 Lookin' bloody well like it, sir. Sorry man.
PogoStick Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Just ask her straight up, Do you want to get together again or you just not feeling it?
veggirl Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Well did you ask her for an actual date or just a vague dinner in the future? Ask her, "do you want to come over on Xday for dinner" and see what she says.
phineas Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Well did you ask her for an actual date or just a vague dinner in the future? Ask her, "do you want to come over on Xday for dinner" and see what she says. Honestly he shouldn't have to but this is the problem with dating today. Both parties think they have to be distant when it comes to interest lest the other person views them as "needy". Men need to learn they can be direct about what they want & can avoid the "needy" by disregarding the woman when she doesn't offer it. Women when need learn that when a man offers an open invitation to do something they can respond with when they are free & not seem needy either. So much wasted time with the back & forth. also for the love of god. STOP PLANING DATES OVER TEXT. CALL CALL CALL CALL. Text is for confirming plans & dirty talk/acquiring nudes. 2
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 So seccond online date, goes ok but don't make move. She texts though saying enjoyed it but pressure of first kiss is killing her. I reply with let me make it up to you, dinner at my place which she agrees. Text her asking her for date she is free. No reply. Text today about a film we spoke about but couldn't remember name, she replies with cool, will check it out. You Blown off? No kiss on the date to an offer to hook up at your place? Can't say I'm surprised that she no longer responds. 4
Andy_K Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 No kiss on the date to an offer to hook up at your place? Can't say I'm surprised that she no longer responds. Agreed. When a guy invites a girl over to his place, whatever the pretense, it's opening the door to sex. You can get away with that as early as a first date if you've got the right dynamic between the two of you, but if you didn't even kiss on the first two dates I'm 99% sure that's way too big a step at once. It's incongruent with the interaction the two of you have so far & the persona you're projecting. On the flip side, cooking dinner for a girl you've never even kissed may well come across as a bit trying-too-hard. So the upshot is, whichever way she interprets your intentions, you're not onto a winner. 3
morbot_k Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 So seccond online date, goes ok but don't make move. She texts though saying enjoyed it but pressure of first kiss is killing her. I reply with let me make it up to you, dinner at my place which she agrees. Text her asking her for date she is free. No reply. Text today about a film we spoke about but couldn't remember name, she replies with cool, will check it out. Blown off? Ask her out for a specific date and time. Don't make her do the thinking. If she says she can't that date. Offer up an alternative date. If she says she still can't. Ask her when is a good time. I've done this, thought I was being blown off. Gave up. Then randomly texted a few weeks later and it was as easy as pie. Sometimes I got not reply. Girls...especially attractive ones...get a lot of texts and offers to hang out. So sometimes it's random. You definitely have to make it enticing and be specific. Of course, if she was really interested, she's probably be engaging with you more. But that doesn't mean you should give up just yet.
Lst11 Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 Sounds like this. Sorry man. But you will find something better
Author picaso28 Posted April 13, 2013 Author Posted April 13, 2013 Didn't put in my post but after date she text saying pressure of first date kiss is killing her. I read this as a sign she wants me to make a move. So I replied saying why I never but then said how about sharks, pictures and dinner at my place.... Thid is what we discussed doing for third date. She replied with so up for sharks, pictures and dinner....good sign right? Now reason I said dinner at my place is to show her I am sexually attracted to her, was worried the lack of kiss gave her wrong idea. She didn't really text much before first and second dates though but just have gut instinct she has lost interest. Think I will just call her on monday and ask her if she wants to hook up for date 3 next Sunday. At least will know one way or other. 1
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 It was in your earlier post. Teasing someone about not kissing you is generally not an open invitation to be propositioned for a bang at your place. Sorry. It's a helpful suggestion that you can kiss her when you next go OUT, because she realizes you're probably very shy and nervous. Good luck with this hookup you plan! Ms. Rosy and company will stand by at the ready just in case. 2
Author picaso28 Posted April 13, 2013 Author Posted April 13, 2013 Mmm but thing is she actually said several times she wanted to see my place....just have to see what she says, not the end of the world if its a no. Ms rosy doesn't really do it for me, more of a blow up doll fan. Lol 1
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 Haha. Glad you have a sense of humor. I wasn't there. I'm limited to what you provide in each post. At any rate, given that she responds to other texts but is unwilling to provide a date/time for this visit, odds are against it happening. Not saying you shouldn't keep trying. Just advising that your expectations be realistic at this point. Dating gets frustrating otherwise. Good luck!
Author picaso28 Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 Yeah love a bit of banter! All part of the game. Yeah I know its hard to summarise here so prob doesn't give you much to advise on. but like you said not very optimistic. She doesn't initiate texts, no reponse asking her for times she is free. Gonna call her monday and get a answer either way. Thanks for advice, yeah it is frustrating!
creighton0123 Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 (edited) Really, though. Pick up the phone and leave a voicemail if she doesn't answer with a date, time and place that you want to meet asking her to call you if she can or can't make it. If she doesn't call you back in a few hours, move on. Edited April 14, 2013 by creighton0123 And a place
Author picaso28 Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 Yeah thanks for advice Creighton, that's what I am going to do on monday. I would do it today but I know she has been away since friday and travelling back today so figure better chance for her to respond once she is back home and settled. Starting to think this dating game is purely about numbers and being upfront from day one. Maybe I hesitated too long with this one
MidwestUSA Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 "Being upfront from day one". You nailed it right there. Such beauty in the simplicity of it all!
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 Starting to think this dating game is purely about numbers and being upfront from day one. Maybe I hesitated too long with this one It's about learning to read the social cues you're given. If you can't do that, you'll strike out.
love1336x Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 So seccond online date, goes ok but don't make move. She texts though saying enjoyed it but pressure of first kiss is killing her. I reply with let me make it up to you, dinner at my place which she agrees. Text her asking her for date she is free. No reply. Text today about a film we spoke about but couldn't remember name, she replies with cool, will check it out. Blown off? Ugh!! this is why I HATE txting! When a man likes me, he NEEDS to call me! We need to hear each other tone of voices, and other stuff that a simple txt does not do. maybe her going to your place isn't something she into... I know when a man invites me to their house for 2nd date. I blow them off. I find it creepy especially not really knowing him well. It's a turn off. Then again I watch a lot of horror t.v, on what could go wrong if you enter stranger house. (rape, murder, other b.s) Call her and ask her to meet at public place.
Author picaso28 Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 Haha yeah maybe your right! She does like the TV show dexter! prob thinks I am serial killer material! Lol Seriously though I said dinner at my place as I wanted to convey I liked her, she text after first date saying first date kiss pressure killing her. I was worried she thought I wasn't into her so overcompensated by asking her to my place. In hindsight prob wrong. Think she just not that into to be honest, give her call tomo and find out for sure. Shame if she is not as I know I could be great for her.
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 14, 2013 Posted April 14, 2013 A kiss on the next public outing wouldn't show interest or attraction? A hookup was needed to show that?? Really?
Author picaso28 Posted April 14, 2013 Author Posted April 14, 2013 Nooo that's not how it was meant to come across but now you mention it maybe I shouldn't have said it! I am cringing! I do actually like her and not after a quick fling. I just panicked she thought I wasn't intersted so that's why I suggested it. I also said go the sea zoo, movies too! Anyway I don't even think this is why she is not that keen. Think she prob dating other men and I'm just not her type.
Cutiepie1976 Posted April 15, 2013 Posted April 15, 2013 Nooo that's not how it was meant to come across but now you mention it maybe I shouldn't have said it! I am cringing! I do actually like her and not after a quick fling. I just panicked she thought I wasn't intersted so that's why I suggested it. I also said go the sea zoo, movies too! Anyway I don't even think this is why she is not that keen. Think she prob dating other men and I'm just not her type. And you should be. So asking someone out on a date isn't showing interest? You need to "make it up" to her and bang her to convey that message? Still trying to understand your thinking on this one...
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