Rainbow65 Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 This has been eating at me for so long now a couple weeks.. My boyfriend and i have been together for almost 2.5 years.. And about a month ago I got exteemely drunk and two of my friends helped me and were taking care of me (one girl and one guy, the girl is obsessed with the guy and they were kind of fooling around together before, however the guy has no feelings for her). I ended up puking and they both took me to the girl's house.. I wanted to fall asleep on the couch and let them sleep in the bedroom but I fell off the couch and said that I wanted to stay there basically lying on the floor. Then the girl told the guy to put me in her bedroom, and I didn't want to but he picked me up and put me in the room.. Then I fell asleep in the room but the guy fell asleep beside me.. The door was open and the girl told him to stay there and watch me so nothing happened to me and then she came later a couple hours I believe.. I feel so bad about this that he slept in the same bed as me when I'm together with my boyfriend.. I told my boyfriend and he got a little upset but didn't say much else.. But I feel soooo bad and I don't know why. Nothing happened obviously, except that he was petting my head because i was telling him that i feel like im dying. maybe he gave me a hug. but I feel horrible like this is something so wrong and that I should be like punished for it and that I'm the biggest slut.. I don't know what to do or how to stop thinking about this.. I am 22 and it is interfering with my studying and daily living. I feel like my relationship is "tainted". Please help, I can barely speak to my boyfriend without thinking about this even though he knows about it, I feel so horrible bc I never wanted a situation like this to ever occur.
TheGuard13 Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 So nothing sexual happened? Do you feel awful that it happened...or do you feel guilty because you wanted something to happen with this guy? Sleeping in bed with someone of the same sex when you have a signicifant other is a bit of a no-no, but its apparent that you were pretty much passed out and this guy laid down beside you. That's not your decision, it was his.
Giraffe1 Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 Why do you feel so awful? You didn't do anything inherently wrong. Is there a deeper issue here?
venusianx13 Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 This has been eating at me for so long now a couple weeks.. My boyfriend and i have been together for almost 2.5 years.. And about a month ago I got exteemely drunk and two of my friends helped me and were taking care of me (one girl and one guy, the girl is obsessed with the guy and they were kind of fooling around together before, however the guy has no feelings for her). I ended up puking and they both took me to the girl's house.. I wanted to fall asleep on the couch and let them sleep in the bedroom but I fell off the couch and said that I wanted to stay there basically lying on the floor. Then the girl told the guy to put me in her bedroom, and I didn't want to but he picked me up and put me in the room.. Then I fell asleep in the room but the guy fell asleep beside me.. The door was open and the girl told him to stay there and watch me so nothing happened to me and then she came later a couple hours I believe.. I feel so bad about this that he slept in the same bed as me when I'm together with my boyfriend.. I told my boyfriend and he got a little upset but didn't say much else.. But I feel soooo bad and I don't know why. Nothing happened obviously, except that he was petting my head because i was telling him that i feel like im dying. maybe he gave me a hug. but I feel horrible like this is something so wrong and that I should be like punished for it and that I'm the biggest slut.. I don't know what to do or how to stop thinking about this.. I am 22 and it is interfering with my studying and daily living. I feel like my relationship is "tainted". Please help, I can barely speak to my boyfriend without thinking about this even though he knows about it, I feel so horrible bc I never wanted a situation like this to ever occur. The bolded statement above would lead me to believe that you may have feelings for him, otherwise, why the need to state such a thing? And if so, this must be where your guilty conscience is coming from. 2
AKisBaked Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 Yay my 100th post! But it sounds like your hiding something from us.. if you didn't do anything sexual with this guy and you know that the guy didn't even touch you. Why do you feel so guilty? From a guy's point of view I may be upset and feeling a bit uneasy for what you did. But if you didn't do anything with him that would reassure me.
Author Rainbow65 Posted April 12, 2013 Author Posted April 12, 2013 I don't know why I feel so badly about it. I think it is because I view the bedroom as a place only for me and my boyfriend. I had a crazy period of my life between the ages of 17-20 but now I met someone who I truly love. And the fact that I was lying beside a person of the opposite sex makes me feel undeserving of my relationship. I really don't know how to forget about this I keep thinking how horrible the situation was and helpless about it. Nothing happened at all and I also have no attraction whatsoever for this guy (my friend). There is nothing more to this night it is just that I feel horrible that I slept beside another guy who wasn't my boyfriend.
Author Rainbow65 Posted April 12, 2013 Author Posted April 12, 2013 The bolded statement above would lead me to believe that you may have feelings for him, otherwise, why the need to state such a thing? And if so, this must be where your guilty conscience is coming from. I wrote what you commented on bc I want people to know the whole story and that's how it was.. I love my boyfriend dearly, I would never hurt him. And I would never hurt my girl friend by doing something with my guy friend who she likes.. So just wanted to make it clear that I have absolutely no attraction for this guy.
LeGenDary_Man Posted April 13, 2013 Posted April 13, 2013 (edited) @Rainbow65 You sound like a committed person. Your boyfriend is lucky. Good to know that nothing sexual happened between you and OM. You were in bad condition and your friends watched you. Let your boyfriend know that you are fully committed to him; he may feel relieved that nothing sexual happened between you and OM (if you have disclosed the details). Try to engage in activities that may help you move on from your current emotional phase. Yoga would be a good start. Good luck. Edited April 13, 2013 by LeGenDary_Man
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