d0620 Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 After he sent me a text telling me not to contact him anymore. 30 days of NC, he contacted me. I waited 10 days to see him, because I knew in my subcontious mind that breaking NC would take me back to square one, but the fantasy that he recognized how much I love him and he couldn't be without me forced me to give it one more try. (Notice I said fantasy) I convinced myself that we had a relationship for these 9 months, but in reality I was basically at his conveinance. He is emotionally unavailable and it wasn't until I reached an all time low of self esteem and looked at the hurt feelings of the man who helped me through the pain is where I realized how important it is to cherish people feelings and how love shows through actions. Its not that complicated, we can see and feel love. If you don't see it or feel it then its not there. Last night, he took me to dinner and I poured my heart out to him. I told him how much I loved him, how I would do anything for him, and all I wanted was for him to be the best man he could be and be faithful to me. I got no real response, except that he understood my feelings and he feels he is giving me the best he can and I should be happy because its more than what he has given anybody else. He then proceeded to call me emotionally needy and spoiled. He seemed to get a kick out of the fact that I was going crazy in order to earn his love. I realized that as much as its going to hurt, that it hurts worse to stay. I realized that he doesn't care about love, he cares about sex. We have had several conversations so he knows where I stand. There is nothing left for us to talk about and clearly its hard for me to walk away. My only question to the posters is: Was it wrong for me to block him without telling him? Most importantly: he already knows what I want, so if he ever decides he wants to provide me with that, then is my belief that he will know how to reach me because he knows where I work and he knows my email, where I live etc. I read this article, which finally led me to my decision. Are You Second Rate? Why He Chose Her Instead of You | Feisty Woman Female Player vs. FWB: Zero Contest | Feisty Woman
Lostint Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 Good for you for having the strength to walk away.
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