Infomercials Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 So, long story short, approx a month after leaving, Mr. Ex calls and says he wants me back. Although I wanted to say yes more than anything in the world, I feel like a month is way too soon for anything to have actually changed. Yes, I'm making changes...and he is too, but it just seemed to me like this was a recipe for disaster later down the line if we got back together so quickly. I told him (and honestly believe) that this isnt like "the end" for us forever, and he said "I don't think so either - I love you too much for that." So, basically I'm looking for some validation that this was the right decision. It feels right...I want him back, but I want him forever. I think time is the right decision. What I don't know is how much...is it just until it feels right? Is there some time frame that's a "minimum" for this? What gives this the best chance to work in the long term? I feel like I need to hear all of this, or I'll go back to him really soon, and I really feel like that wouldn't really work.
OwlSoul Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 There is no defined timeframe. But yeah, getting back too fast is a bad idea usually. My ex and I were trying to a month ago, but he started feeling the same werid feeling which made him broke up with me 2 months ago. So we're kind of taking it really slow now. He is not dating anyone atm, me neither. Guess it is really moving into a more positive way. Especially with me fixing some stuff about myself. 1
singme2sleep Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 Can I ask why he broke up with you in the first place?
Noma Posted April 11, 2013 Posted April 11, 2013 Couldn't you just take things slow and make sure you take your own space still?
Author Infomercials Posted April 11, 2013 Author Posted April 11, 2013 Well, we're young - both 22 - and have been together for almost six years now. He told me he felt like he didn't know who he was without me, and he needed to figure that out. I believe that he truly loves me, but what I'm unsure of is if we get back together now, how will he ever experience that? I'm afraid those feelings will just come back a few months, years, whatever from now, and I'm wondering if giving space and time now would be the best idea. I don't honestly know about "taking it slow" - I wonder if it would give him what he needs to be sure about things or not?
swiftly333 Posted April 12, 2013 Posted April 12, 2013 I dunno what's "right" but Ill tell you how I feel being on the other side of this equation. I went back to my ex after a month. I have made a LOT of BIG changes in one month! I realized a LOT of things. I know I still have a long ways to go, but you dont have to be alone to continue to grow? right? And I know that if we were to work things out it would have to be taken really slow(he's still not sure if hes willing to try as of yet) I think you can grow along with somebody, as long as you guys foster and not hinder each other's growth. Maybe I am wrong here....
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