ohaimark Posted April 10, 2013 Posted April 10, 2013 (edited) So, long story short, my girlfriend and I broke up about two weeks ago. The breakup was precipitated by her depression issues, her sense of lost identity and school stresses, and was brewing for a little while. The breakup was fairly mutual, although she needed the split more than I did, and she wants me in her life once things settle, and vice versa. About a week after the breakup, I went to get my stuff from her place, and it was very apparent then that neither of us really wanted things to end (she seemed anxious to know when I was coming beforehand, she was on the verge of tears when I was there, said she was sorry the breakup had to be this way, and texted me about one item we forgot hours after I left. I almost came back immediately after I left, but I didn't). I know she was very conflicted about the breakup, and she said this was the first time she's ever ended things with someone she still has feelings for (paraphrasing). I also went on a blind date last night (we were set up by a friend who knew we were both recently out of a relationship/fling), which led to some enjoyable making out, but I just missed my ex a ton after. Right now, I'm figuring out how to get some things in my life back in order (picking up some old hobbies, taking charge of my crap job situation), but I'm debating how long I should wait before I reach out to her again. I'm currently holding myself to about 6-8 weeks of no contact. It's entirely likely she'll reach out first, but I'm not sure whether I should wait until her semester is over in case she doesn't. Is that too long? Too soon? If I made the first move, even after months, would I come off as weak? How should I make that move? Should I care how she handles those personal problems? What are your thoughts? Edited April 10, 2013 by ohaimark
icsvortex Posted April 10, 2013 Posted April 10, 2013 wait for her, if she wants contact she will call or text you. Especially if you guys happens to run into each other somewhere, do not stop and talk. Let her reach out and text or call you......if she cares she will. You may wait for a week a month or up to 6 months, go out and live your life....that's what she is going to be doing.
youngnlove89 Posted April 10, 2013 Posted April 10, 2013 So you go out on a blind date and make out with a girl you don't know? Wow, I hope to god my ex didn't do that. Immature. You need space right now. You are confused frankly. And by space I mean ALONE time. No girls right now, just you and yourself. Think about things. Get it together. When you are in the right state of mind, talk to your ex, but don't do it now. It will be too emotional and messy. Sounds like neither of you know what you want. Time, my friend. You need time, not more girls or more drama.
Author ohaimark Posted April 10, 2013 Author Posted April 10, 2013 (edited) Trust me, I felt very immature after the makeout, its not the sort of thing I usually do; I'm ending that before it goes any further. She was a very nice girl, but otherwise, the conversation went nowhere, and all I could think about was how much more I have in common with my ex than this girl. Edited April 10, 2013 by ohaimark
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